Cock Quality Control

Literotic asexstories – Cock Quality Control by Pabiporffor,Pabiporffor
Authors note.

Ever worried your daughters first time could be ruined by an incompetent boyfriend? Do you wish you could hire a woman to test drive him first? Nicole thinks her friend Holly is mad but is she?

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Nicole needed a fuck, it had been nearly a week since she last had cock and his performance left a lot to be desired. Work and family commitments had hampered her opportunities, but now it was Friday and the hunt was on. At a mere 4′ 10 her 38DD-24-36 figure drew the eye and paired nicely with her flirtatious bubbly personality and natural blonde hair that was always worn up. Tonight her dark red low-cut dress advertised both breast and leg leaving no man in doubt about what was on offer.

At 25, Nicole was experienced, and like most girls, she had a few fuckbuddies she could call upon. But she enjoyed the thrill of new encounters. She had always been impulsive and thinking was never her strong point. While most women would ponder over whether to buy those shoes online and which outfit they’d match, Nicole would click buy in seconds, then sort out those problems with more shopping. Nicole did not have a healthy bank account.

Years ago, when she was barely legal, she made one such snap decision and blinkers on to the dangers, went home with a hot guy who picked her up in a bar. It could have all gone tragically wrong, yet miraculously she lost her cherry in a night of wild abandonment and orgasmic conclusion.

She had learned since, that such encounters were a hit-and-miss affair, while one man could ride and skillfully guide you to a mattress-drenching finish, more often than not you left with an apology and a pathetic excuse. Perhaps it was this unpredictability that drew her to the chase, Nicole was always looking to recapture the thrill of her first time.

She never drank alone, so tonight she was meeting up with her old friend Holly. Like Nicole, she was blessed with ample chest but stood close to six foot with long legs that went right up to her flowing red hair that danced like a silk sheet on her back with every step she took.

Two years her senior, she had been a role model in Nicole’s early sexual development. Holly oozed sexual confidence to the point of intimation. She was the type many men struggled to look in the eye and beat the meat to alone at night. A little boldness would have seen many a lonely cock embraced in her warmth.

They had agreed to meet each other at the usual place under the clock tower in the town square. Holly was already waiting when Nicole arrived, she stood up from the wooden bench to greet her.

“Nicole, looking good. Where are we off to first then?”

“Red Lion? I don’t fancy the Tanner’s Arms it’s gone downhill.”

“Yeah, new landlords killed it with the crap music.”

“Attracts the wrong sort of crowd doesn’t it? I’m guessing from that outfit you’re looking to swallow more than a few pints?”

“Bloody right I am.”

Reaching their destination the girls bought a glass of wine each and sat at a small circular table. The secret was to pick one in sight of the bar near the main thoroughfare. That way you got noticed by guys and were easier to approach. A tiny table also hinted that you weren’t waiting for your boyfriends.

“So, didn’t go well last weekend then with that guy? He looked ok though,” asked Holly.

“No qualms about his size, he just couldn’t use it. If he wasn’t 30 I’d swear he was a virgin.”

“Clumsy was he?”

“God it was like being fucked by a table, you know when you do the plank down the gym? Imagine being under a guy doing that.”

“So you didn’t cum then?”

“Only saving grace was he was finished in 5 minutes. Then the cheeky twat asked if I came. Lack of fucking moaning should have been a clue. If he was my first I swear I would have turned into a fucking lesbian.”

“You know what you are? A fucking hero. That guy could have picked up a virgin that night and ruined her first time.”

“Yeah, I deserve a fucking medal.”

“If you think about it how many guys you been with now? A fair few, boyfriends and one-night stands. How many were disappointing in the sack?”

“More than I’d like. I mean sure you can play the odds, pick up on those signs a guy’ll be good but the end of the day it’s still a gamble.”

“It’s like my dad, spends a fortune on fishing tackle, stares for hours at wind charts and tide tables, gets up at 3 am to be right place right time. You know what he catches? Fuck all 90% of the time but he’s happy as a pig in shit when it pays off.”

“You remember that time your mum said he couldn’t go that night, and the next day some guy put a giant fish on Facebook?”

“God he was fucking gutted never stopped whining for weeks it should have been his.”

“He does take some nice sunrise photos though.”

Holly raised her glass, “Well here’s to all three of us catching a big one tonight.”

“You know what they should do? Give cocks sizes as they do with bras. None of this 12.65cm crap, just a nice round number and a letter. 5A is 5 inches and skinny 8D is 8 inches and thick.”

“Nah, guys can’t even understand bras. Keep the number but the letter should reflect his dick skills. 6A, 6 inches excellent in bed, 6D, 6 inches but shit. Wouldn’t be hard if there was an app or something.”

“Fuck yeah, should be compulsory. Link it to face recognition and you’d know if he’s worth fucking with just a click. You could call it Dick Advisor.”

“It’s like when you sleep with a guy after his girlfriend boasts about his dick size. It’s a fucking invite as far as I’m concerned.”

“Exactly, if you don’t want other girls to fuck him don’t advertise it.”

“Look at that guy over there, the one with the woman in black. Opinion?” asked Holly.

“Well, she’s far better looking and that’s obviously a supermarket shirt so he’s not got a good income. Only logical conclusion is he’s got a big cock.”

“Soo, who’s going to fuck him, me or you?”

Nicole laughed, “What about her? don’t think she’ll be too keen.”

“It’s not like I’m going to walk up and fuck him on the table, I’ll wait until he goes to the toilet. I’ve got class me.”

“How do you know he’ll say yes?”

“Cos he’s looked at my tits twice already.”

“Half the pub’s been looking at them. Ok, your turn. That family over there on the corner table, thoughts? ”

Holly looked out of the corner of her eye for a silent moment, “Husband and wife, obviously. The girl’s about 18, got her mother’s looks. But that other guy doesn’t seem to fit in, looks a little awkward too. I’d say he’s the girl’s boyfriend.”

“Come on you can do better than that.”

“Fathers reached that point where he’s having to accept a guy’s going to plough his daughter and he’s not happy it could be this one.”

“Or perhaps he already has?”

“Nah she looks a virgin and he’s sick of beating the meat until she says yes.”

“What about the mother?”

“Nah, don’t think he’s fucked her yet.”

“I mean does she look happy with her daughter’s choice?”

“Hmmm, Think we should go ask? ”

Nicole laughed, Holly downed the last of her drink, raised her eyebrows and stood up. A feeling of dread swept over Nicole, she knew that look. This was one of those moments you wished you could watch through your fingers as the ground swallowed you up. But it was for moments like this she drank with Holly. With a smile, she casually trotted over to the family.

“Excuse me,” asked Holly as she leaned over their table. The woman gave her husband that, ‘get rid of her’ look but he was too busy trying to keep eye contact and not stare at Holly’s noticeable cleavage chasm. The daughter kept one eye on her and a watchful eye on her boyfriend.

“Me and my friend like to play this game where we pick random people and try to deduce things about them. Are we correct that this is your daughter and her boyfriend and not a brother?”

“Yes,” replied a confused-looking mother.

“Thought so,” said Holly as she turned to look at the girl, “My friend says you’re getting nailed by him but I think he’s only getting head, who’s right?”

“I beg your pardon,” snapped the mother, “I think you should leave.”

It was the response Holly expected but the father’s silence said more than the mother’s outburst. Men rarely stand up to women, preferring to hide behind their wives. But it was that quick glance at his daughter’s boyfriend that intrigued Holly, Why him and not his daughter?

“You know if you’re worried about his ability to give her a good time we can test him out for you.”

“There’s nothing wrong with my performance,” barked the boyfriend, suddenly realizing his error as the father glared at him. Holly made good her escape. Nicole knew it was time to find another bar.

“By Jesus fuck, we’ve barely been out half an hour and you’ve destroyed a family,” said Nicole.

“I set the daughter free, no more sneaky cock, worrying about daddy finding out.”

“Yeah, long as he doesn’t kill the poor guy.”

“I was right though, I could see it in his eyes, he was concerned about his daughter’s cherry.”

“Well, up to five minutes ago she was happy enough with him.”

“She got lucky, millions won’t. I’m telling you thousands of parents would pay good money for someone to evaluate their daughter’s first dick.”

“Bollocks, you get some crazy ideas.”

“If I’m right you’re buying the next round,” with that Holly made her over to a middle-aged man coming out of a shop, “Excuse me, dumb question but do you have a daughter?”

He looked taken back for a moment, it had been many a year since he was last approached by an attractive girl. “Erm, yes,” he replied.

“All grown up?”

“Yes 21, do you two know her?” he replied with a confused look on his face.

“No, just assumed with your age you might have one. Thing is, me and my friend have been talking about sex.” His ears pricked up and his cock twitched. “I think most dads worry about their daughter”s first fuck but my friend says they don’t care. So quick question would you pay a girl to test run her boyfriend before he ploughs her to make sure he’s doing it right?”

“I’m sorry I’m a bit confused here,” he replied.

“She only loses her cherry once and it’s a big deal to a girl, so as a father were you worried he’d ruin it by being a two-pump-chump or being too rough? ”

“You hope it goes well but you tend not to think of her doing it?”

“See, told you dads didn’t care,” said Nicole.

“Not sure my daughter would have appreciated me having her boyfriend examined first either. What do I tell her, hey your boyfriends shit in bed you should dump him?”

Holly grinned, “Yeah pretty much. Look at it this way, if she had her heart set on a car because she liked the colour but you knew it was a death trap, would you stop her?”

“Yes, of course.”

“Same thing really, no harm in looking under the bonnet and taking it for a test drive to make sure the wheels don’t fall off.”

“Tell you what, give me a blow job and if you’re any good I’ll recommend your service to my mates.”

The girls weren’t convinced he would keep his word but it would be dumb to turn down the offer, besides after putting him on the spot they kinda felt they owed him one.

“So, which of us do you think you can handle?” asked Holly.

He wondered for a moment if they were just leading him on, but didn’t want to blow his chances. “You’ll do nicely.”

To his relief and surprise, he found himself being led by the arm into an unlit narrow dumpster-filled alleyway. It wasn’t exactly a romantic location but being a dead end the girls knew they weren’t going to be spotted. Nicole hung back a little as a lookout while in the shadows Holly got to work.

Squatting in such places was an art Holly had long mastered. The secret was to wear a skirt short enough that it wouldn’t touch the ground and heels of just the right height they allowed your bottom to perch comfortably on your heels.

He quickly fumbled with his belt and buckle opening up just enough to get his cock out. It was what Holly called a teapot cock in reference to the nursery rhyme I’m a little teapot short and stout. It wasn’t the mouth filler she hoped for but she was a girl of her word.

Holly looked up and in one motion took him entirely. From the tip of his cock that lay in her throat, to the base sealed with her lips, he was instantly in Heaven. She inhaled, clamping down from every angle almost crushing him in her oral embrace. It was her signature opening move that let guys know she was in control.

Good as she was at oral, Holly also enjoyed breathing and released her clasp before gagging. With him under control, it was time for her to get what she came for. He gripped her shoulders as his cock was massaged within, every nod of the head felt different as she expertly directed just the right amount of pressure and flexed her tongue.

He looked down and watched in awe as with each third suck his cock would disappear completely on cue. The view was enriched by the sight of her firm breasts that seemed to frame his cock as it glided between her eager lips. She slid her hand up his thigh and slipped it between his legs cradling his balls gently in her long red fingernails.

A swirl of tongue around the head and a snake-like flicker on the tip made him quiver and thank the gods for his blessing. The taste of precum on her tongue told Holly her fun would soon be over. Once more she took him deep and worked her magic rolling her head side to side as she bobbed and weaved along his ever-stiffening shaft. Sensing the inevitable Holly ceased the nodding and sucked like a staving calf until he erupted like a well-shaken champagne bottle.

“Why are you panting? I’m the one who done all of the work,” joked Holly as she rose to her feet.

“Fucking hell that was twenty times better than the wife.”

Holly giggled handing him her number scrawled on an old receipt, “Don’t forget to tell the wife and your friends.”

The girls soon found themselves in another pub. It was a noisier crowded venue, but the drinks were cheaper, which was always good the last week before payday. Not that the girls had any intention of buying.

At the far end of the bar stood two guys chatting as they waited to be served. Late thirties perhaps early forties they were ideal. The girls both had a thing for older guys, not only was the sex better there was something gratifying about being under the weight of a larger older male. Holly noticed one of them fix his eyes on the tight butt of a passing girl longer than would be considered polite. That ruled out the risk of them being gay but from this distance, they couldn’t see if they had a ring on their finger. It was time to wander over and say hi.

“You’re better off without him,” said Holly in a loud voice. It was an old ruse, nothing twitched a dick faster than hearing a girl was on the rebound.

“You’re right, I need a real man but I’ll settle for a G&T right now.”

The guy’s ears cocked up in textbook fashion, a twitch, a little head turn then the full body swing around. His eyes met Holly’s for a brief second before instinctively glimpsing down at her cleavage. It’s said that it’s impossible not to look at a £50 note held up and the same held true for Holly’s breasts.

He tore his gaze from her chest but the look on her face let him know she saw him look. She smiled to ease the tension and waited his response, it was important to let men think they were in control, especially the older ones.

“Evening Ladies, not seen you in here before.”

Both girls regularly drank there and it wasn’t the first time they’d heard that icebreaker, “We don’t come here much,” lied Holly.

“It’s not bad in here, can we get you a drink or are you waiting for someone?”

It was the classic toe dip response guys used to check if you had a partner, “No we’re both single, just out for a few drinks and a bit of fun,” replied Nicole with a smile and invited them to join them at a table.

Drinks secured for the night, the game was now to determine whether it was worth rewarding their generosity to the fullest extent. Naturally, a blow job was the bare minimum, that was just good manners, but both girls yearned for more. Short of confessing they had tiny cocks and lived in Mum’s basement the guy’s night looked promising.

“So what you into?” asked Holly as they took a table. In truth she didn’t really care if he collected stamps or skydived, the important thing was he avoided the answer ‘I’m into everything.’ It was an answer that pissed her off, no one is into everything. ‘Do you enjoy Polynesian nose flute music? Can I peg you with my fluffy dildo?’ Holly would rip into anyone who dared utter it.

“We’re both into rugby and fishing. I’m Eddie and this is my brother Tom by the way.”

“Fishing?” replied Nicole, “We’ll fix you up with her dad. I’m Nicole and she’s Holly.

“Brothers?” asked Holly, not seeing any family resemblance, “You live together?”

“No, but not far apart, just west of the park.”

Both girls knew when a guy was so specific about his address so early in the evening, what he was gauging was your willingness to go there. It was a way of saying I don’t live far, my place or yours. It was important to respond in a way that suggested you would without sounding like you were ready to go in five minutes.

“So still walkable in after five drinks then?” said Holly with a smile.

“You’ve got your heels on,” replied Nicole, “Best make it just three.”

Three drinks might have been optimistic. By the second round, Holly already had her hand on one guy’s leg and was playfully leaning into him as they chatted. Nicole herself wasn’t being bashful, so when one of the guys eventually plucked up the courage to ask if they were looking for anything else tonight she replied with a nod and a smile.

That third drink never came and the girls parted ways at the corner of Acorn Road each with a guy on their arm. Nicole soon found herself at the door of Eddie’s unremarkable Victorian terraced house typical of the area.

“I’d a feeling you’d be up for it the minute we bumped into each other,” he said.

“What gave it away?” she replied jutting her chest out.

“You want a drink first? I’ve a few beers in the fridge.”

“It’s alright I’ve had enough tonight.”

His bedroom contained a double bed but otherwise had all the hallmarks of a guy without a woman in his life. Clothes were crumpled in the corners or those worn yet not dirty enough to wash draped over the back of a chair. The bed was unmade but otherwise clean with no obvious crispy silvery stains on the sheets.

Derobing wasn’t romantic, each stripped as if they were going to bed as normal, he showed no signs of unease which told Nicole he was experienced in one night stands not just relationship sex. His muscular body had a good layer of fat on it but retained some definition and it was clear he wasn’t concerned about body hair. It was a body you’d expect to see in a 70s porno rather than on Instagram.

Nicole didn’t mind, despite her own polished appearance she quite liked the feeling of a traditional real man pressed against her. She slid her black satin thong off and hung them playfully on his bulging erect cock. He smiled, flung them over his shoulder, pushed her onto the bed and immediately buried his tongue in her snatch.

Some men like to tease and build suspense, others prefer to get straight to the point and make it clear what they want. Nicole’s experience instantly told her she was going to get the pounding she’d been craving all week. Too many guys only went down because they saw it in porn then licked you like your pussy was a habanero chill dropped in cat litter.

He certainly knew where the clitoris was and was making good use of it, like a Maypole dancer his tongue swirled and flitted around it twisting and turning before he delved deep within her contorting and writhing like he was searching for something. Here was a man who enjoyed his work. Nicole softly groaned a “oh god” and pushed his head down as she clenched her buttocks lifting herself into his face.