Emma and Jeff

‘Storm’ was the word that came to mind as I watched her get out of the car – a dark cloud coming up the driveway, signalling heavy weather on the way. There was an aura around her as if lightning could strike at any moment. Suddenly, the thought of her staying with me looked like a bad idea, a very bad idea. She was pretty, petite, and looked about as friendly as a live grenade. She saw me standing at the door and returned my smile with a sullen glare.

“Um, hi, Emma. It’s good to see you. It’s been a while.”

She shrugged and stood at the bottom of the steps, arms folded, looking off into the distance as her parents caught up. I’d never seen my sister and her husband look so utterly exhausted. Nora had that blank look, the soldier’s thousand-yard stare. Greg struggled to offer me a smile.

“Hey, Jeff. It’s good to see you.”

“C’mon in, everyone. You look like you could use a rest after that long trip. We can bring Emma’s stuff in later. Make yourselves comfortable and I’ll get us something to drink. Tea, coffee, soda?”

“Anything stronger?” Greg pleaded.

“Sure, Greg. How about a beer?”

“I’d love one, thanks.”

“Nora, a glass of wine?”

My sister looked up. “Hmm? Oh, I think a glass of red would help. Thanks, Jeff.”

I turned to Emma. She was folded up in my favourite wingchair, hugging her legs, her chin on her knees. “How about you, Emma? Can I get you something?”

She stared at the floor and shook her head, saying nothing.

Nora let out an exasperated sigh. “Emma, could you please be even just a little polite? Uncle Jeff is really going out of his way for you. The least you could do is be civil.”

“Fuck that,” Emma said as she stormed out of the room, heading for the front door.

“Emma!” her mother cried. “For god’s sake!” She turned to me. “I’m so sorry, Jeff. We had no idea she would still be like this. We thought it might be difficult but, my god, three days on the road with that set of claws was almost unbearable. I won’t blame you at all if you change your mind. We can pull the plug on the whole idea and go home.”

“No. Don’t even think that. I said I would. It’s a big house, there’s plenty of room for both of us. She won’t even know I’m here if that’s what she wants. And the campus is literally around the corner. She couldn’t find a better place.”

Greg spoke up. “Thanks, Jeff. I gotta say, you’re going way above and beyond. The tuition back home was steep enough, but this school is on a whole other level. We could never afford residence costs on top of it. We owe you big time.”

“No, you don’t. I don’t want to hear another word about it. I told you my door was open for her. End of. I mean, who knew she’d do so well? This is the only place capable of challenging her, right? This will happen. It must be incredibly difficult to change schools in the middle of a year, but I won’t let you down. I won’t let her down. She stays.”

My sister’s eyes glistened as she came and hugged me tightly. “Thank you so much, dear big brother. You have no idea what this means to me, to us.”

“Hey, we’re family, it’s what we do,” I said, hugging her back. She followed me into the kitchen as I went to pour our drinks. “What happened, Nora? I can understand the challenge she’s in for, but why is she in such a foul mood?”

“In a word? Professors.” Nora sighed as she leaned against the counter. “Or more to the point, one particular professor. Emma accused her advisor of assaulting her when they were alone in her office, but she had no way of proving it. Things got very ugly. It was a ‘she said, she said’ situation that the school wanted to just go away. Nobody believed a female prof would do that to a student. The shit really hit the fan when Emma threatened to go to the police, proof, or no proof. The dean of students called us in and suggested in no uncertain terms that we find Emma another school. It was an impossible situation all round. She thinks we really let her down by going along with the dean’s advice but there’s no way she could have stayed there, not after something like that. I know she’s hurting; she’s built walls around herself a thousand feet high. She doesn’t trust anyone.”

“Ah, I see. I get it now. I thought she wanted to finish her degree at a top-tier school. She certainly has the smarts for it.”

“Well, honestly yes, that is part of the story, and I’m sorry for keeping quiet on this. It’s too bad; that prof was so qualified to guide her. Even if they’d let Emma stay, there was no one else on the faculty who could keep up with her. She was lucky to be accepted here but it’ll be almost like starting over. I really feel for her. She’s under a tremendous amount of pressure.”

I gave my little sister a tight squeeze. “Hey, we’ll get her through this. She’ll come round. I can feel it in my bones. This is all going to work out, no matter how dark it seems right now.”

Nora pulled a loose strand of hair out of her eyes. “I hope you’re right. If she could only see that we just want her to be okay.”

We finished our drinks and headed outside to gather Emma’s luggage from the car. She was sitting on a bench surrounded by the lush greenery of the gardens. My home was an oasis on the edge of the downtown core, set back from the road, private, serene. I was in the right place at the right time when it came on the market so long ago and as time passed, my wife and I had planted and shaped it into a miniature Eden. Emma was just a toddler back then, waddling along the garden paths when Nora and Greg came to visit. Living so far away kept us apart more than we hoped. Emma had grown shocking amounts each time we got together, first a chubby little baby girl, soon a gangly preteen and now an attractive young woman. She was petite like my sister, with those same big, beautiful eyes.

Greg called her over to help with the luggage. Surprisingly, she pitched in right away, struggling with an enormous suitcase that probably weighed as much as she did.

“Can I give you a hand with that, Emma? That thing’s huge.”

Those beautiful eyes fired daggers at me. “I got it.”

I shrugged and watched her fight that suitcase up the porch steps and through the door. Poor thing. She was so determined to be angry, there was nothing to do but let her be. Hopefully, in time…

We brought everything up to my daughter’s old bedroom and left Emma alone. I wondered whether some time spent unpacking and sorting might distract her enough to calm her down. Nora, Greg, and I headed back to the living room.

“After that epic drive, I hope you’ll at least stay the night,” I asked.

Nora looked at Greg, then shook her head. “Thanks, Jeff. Under any other circumstances we would love to, but I think Emma’s had about all she can take of us right now. It’s early enough to start home. I hope that doesn’t sound like we want to cut and run.”

“Not at all. To be honest, it seems you two really need a break. Go on and say your goodbyes. I’ll put a snack and some drinks together for the road.”

I could hear voices overhead as I stood in the kitchen, sometimes getting louder, like waves crashing on a rocky shore. I felt badly for them, to see my own family going through such a rough patch. I was determined to do whatever I could to help them through it.

Nora and Greg came back downstairs, and I met them in the front hall. Nora’s eyes were red, her cheeks wet. I hugged her tightly and kissed her, then gave Greg’s hand a good, firm shake. “It’s gonna be okay, guys. You just need some space. Take a deep breath. It may take the rest of the year, but she’ll come round. I’ll make sure she’s okay, I promise.” I stood on the porch as they circled around onto the street and waved goodbye. I waited until they were out of sight before I went back inside. I started up the stairs to check on my niece but then hesitated. It had been years since my own moody kids had sulked in their rooms. Was I really prepared to face that dragon again? I turned back and headed for the den, poured myself a finger of whiskey and slumped down into the deep sofa facing the television.

I’d been mindlessly surfing the channels for a couple of hours when a girl-shaped shadow appeared at the door. “Emma?” She edged into the room, silent, her eyes lowered. I motioned to the other end of the sofa. “Hey, c’mon in, put your feet up. You must be tired, hmm?” She curled up into a tight ball at the far end of the couch, staring blankly at the screen in front of us. Her eyes were red, swollen. She looked completely worn out. “Can I… can I get you something? You must be hungry by now.” She turned, keeping her eyes down, and nodded.

“Yes, please,” she whispered.

I patted the empty space between us and got up. “I think this is a good night for junk food. And maybe a soda?”

“Thanks, Uncle Jeff,” she said, nodding again.

I came back with a bowlful of chips and a frosty glass of cola. I set the bowl down between us and handed her the glass. As she took it, she looked at the decanter of whiskey on the table beside me, then back at her glass. I thought, what the hell, she’s old enough. Maybe it’ll settle her nerves. “Would you like me to make that a little stronger for you?”

She looked up at me, surprised. “Really?”

“Emma, as far as I’m concerned, you’re an adult and when you’re under my roof you’re going to be treated like one. Give me your glass.” I added a splash to her drink and handed it back to her. “Just take your time with it, okay? You’ve had a tough day. I don’t want you getting buzzed your first night here. Have some chips first.”

I swear that for a split second, I saw the tiniest smile appear.

Baby steps.

I finally settled on a movie I thought she might enjoy, something that didn’t confirm she was now living with an embarrassing dinosaur of an uncle completely out of touch with the here and now. Yes, yes, my kids were grown, I was semi-retired, and for good measure, alone. I’d been on my own for years now, but I sometimes told myself I was still with it, still cool. I’d spent an evening or two at some of the better bars in town, been on the occasional date, but nothing serious ever came of any of it. My heart simply wasn’t in it. I had a small circle of friends, a few pastimes here and there, but for the most part I kept to myself. Having Emma stay with me was the biggest event in quite a while.