Suddenly, they were back to the staring contest.
“Like I told you yesterday, the leash, the handcuffs, the abuse, all that unpleasantness could disappear, like that …” he said snapping his fingers again, “if you’d just play along.”
“What about my family?” Jessica demanded, “will the bullets that ripped their bodies apart suddenly disappear? Will they suddenly come back to life, and will I suddenly be home?”
It was Jim’s turn to lose the contest. He lowered his eyes, his head. Silence hung in the air.
“No, Jessica. None of that will happen.” He forced his eyes back up to meet hers. He had a sudden image of her spitting at him, but she only sat staring back at him. Her hazel eyes should have been easy to look into, but the anger and hatred he found in them made it anything but easy to maintain eye contact.
“Look. I can’t change the past, but I can play the guitar again for you. Would you like that?”
This time Jessica broke eye contact and turned her face away from him.
“Maybe next time then.” Jim said. “If you’d like, I can play my guitar for you every time you’re here with me. All I ask is that you stop fighting the name, and you stop fighting the leash. At least with me. Just show me some good will. Okay?”
Silence ensued, but Jessica had momentarily looked at him from the corner of her eye. Well, that was something. He didn’t know what, but something.
“Alright then. Let’s get on with the day. Shower time.” Jim got up and went to his chest of drawers and began searching for fresh clothing both for him and for Jessica. Even though the men weren’t willing to follow Angus’ suggestions of letting Jessica walk around naked, neither were they willing to invest in any clothing for her. She wore the mens’ clothes … all way to large.
Jessica snuck a look at him while his back was to her. The words “good will” echoed through her mind. She really didn’t know what to make of him. Who the hell used words like “good will”, especially in this kind of situation? She couldn’t picture Josh or Scott using them, and certainly not Riley or Angus. Just Jim. He turned and smiled when he saw her watching him. Jessica snapped her head down.
“Let’s go,” he said unlocking her cuffs. When she stood, he hooked the leash onto the harness that remained on her body almost 24 hours a day. He walked away from her until the leash went taut, inches from the bedroom door. He stopped and waited. Not knowing why exactly, Jessica took a step forward. And then another. Jim exhaled, having inadvertently held his breath.
In the bathroom, Jim started the shower. Stepping back from the stall, he held the shower curtain open he said, “Ladies first”. Jessica turned her back to him and began to undress. That was something else. Jim was the only one who let her turn her back to him to undress. Jim was the only one that let her undress herself. In fact, Jim was the only one who let her shower by herself.
She began to skirt him, back to him, on her way to the shower, but as she looked over her shoulder, she noticed that he was looking away. No lurid leering with Jim either. As the hot water fell on her, she recalled the conclusion she’d come to the previous day, about the leash. She wasn’t sure that she could stand to give in to the others, particularly not those bastards, Riley and Angus. But, she could try for Jim.
“Done?” Jim asked after a few minutes. Jessica peeked around the shower curtain. Jim held a towel out to her. She wrapped it around herself and got out of the shower stall. Jim waited for her to dry and dress. He hooked the leash to the bathroom ceiling hook, turned his back on her and undressed. In the shower, he whistled. He was whistling the tune of one of the songs that he’d played the night before on his guitar.
Jessica sat and listened. The songs brought her back to a much happier time. She closed her eyes and listened. All she needed was to get off that damned leash, then she could get away for good. Jim didn’t look out of the shower once. If she were off the leash now, she could just slip out, somehow get to the front door, and run. That’s all she wanted to do. Run.
*****************************************************************************************************************************************************************
Josh paced the small floor space before his bed. Tonight it would be easier to control himself than other nights. Jessica’s bruised and battered body wasn’t as appealing to touch as it was otherwise. He looked at Jessica, lying on his bed, hands cuffed above her head, spread eagle with each foot cuffed to a bed post. She was fully clothed. He found that she got less upset that way. She was staring at the ceiling, holding her breath undoubtedly, her chest wasn’t moving. He dreaded these nights because it took every bit of energy he had to control himself. He winced as he remembered the first night he’d had with her after Riley had told the men to start having sex with her. He hadn’t intended to go all the way. A little petting maybe, but once he’d started, he couldn’t stop. She’d cried.
Josh felt sick to his stomach as he remembered the hysteria with which she’d reacted. It was worse than any break downs she’d had to that point.
Since that night, he’s worked hard to restrain himself and take it slow. He decided to work his way down her body, not moving to the next body part until he could touch the previous one without her crying. He’d promised her not to go all the way until she felt comfortable. It was a difficult promise to keep. Every night ended with him feeling like he’d been kicked in the balls. With a final resolution to restrict himself to touching only, Josh climbed on the bed and lay down beside Jessica.
“Just relax,” he said sliding his hand under her shirt and seeking a breast. “Let yourself enjoy this.” His voice was low, guttural, his breath hot on her cheek, whispering while pulling gently on her nipple.
Jessica didn’t even bother trying to fight. She needed her energy for later. She didn’t know why he bothered with these pretexts every time she was with him. He’d spend half an hour to an hour with these ridiculous games at the beginning of every night.
But then later, once she had fallen asleep, he’d rape her anyway. And no matter how much she fought or cried, he’d continue. The only consolation she had was that unlike Angus, Josh didn’t seem to enjoy inflicting pain on her. He got his rocks off, turned over and went to sleep.
‘Good God.’ Josh thought. He couldn’t take this much longer. Her nipple had become erect, she was obviously enjoying it, but when he cupped her breast Jessica tried to pull away. He had to stop now, or he’d do something he didn’t want to.
“Good night Jessica,” he said turning his back on her, switching off the light. He lay down, closed his eyes and fervently hoped sleep would come quickly.
In the living room the next morning Jessica fought to keep her eyes open. True to form Josh had made it a night of continuous assault. Unlike Angus who seemed to like a good pre-rape fight, Josh staked her out so she couldn’t move. The best she could do was curse him in her mind as she lay helpless.
She felt anger boiling within her. But despite that, she couldn’t fight the fatigue that was coming over her. She exhaled and leaned her head back against the sofa. For the next little while anyway, she was safe. Riley and Angus seemed to be away still. Jim and Josh were out of the house, and the only one left was Scott. He was rummaging around in the kitchen, but even if he weren’t distracted she had little to fear from him in terms of sexual assault. Much like Jim, Scott seemed to have no desire to torture her. He hated her, there was no doubt about that. He’d hurt her plenty over the months she’d been there, but never in that way. Jessica slid down on the sofa as sleep over took her.
Scott stood watching Jessica sleep. He held the tiny birth control pill in his hand. She needed her dose for the day, but it could wait. Especially now that she took it without a fight. Scott shook his head as he remembered the about face she’d done when Riley’d pointed out that if she didn’t take the pill she’d end-up mothering their children.
The look of revulsion on her face had left no doubt as to how much she truly hated them. Even Riley and Angus had been taken aback.
Well, what did they expect? If there was one thing he knew, it was what it took to pleasure a woman. Nothing about their current situation lent itself to a pleasurable experience. The other men obviously had no problems forcing themselves on Jessica, but Scott wanted nothing of it.
He had his share of women in town and within the clan that begged Scott to have sex with them. He smiled as he remembered one such event the previous night. With or without this pill, there was no way Jessica would be mothering his child. And thank God. No child deserved to be hated. He shuddered as he imagined the contempt that Jessica would have for a child of theirs.
Scott fell into the armchair across from the sofa where Jessica slept. She was pretty. Despite the bruises, swollen eye and lip, she was pretty. He was attracted to her, and in another place, another time, he would’ve done his all to pleasure her. And she would’ve wanted it. He was sure of that, as sure as he was that he had a nose on his face. He never met a woman he didn’t please, never met a woman that didn’t want him, until Jessica.
Often he felt a longing to reach out to her, make her happy in ways he knew he could. But then he’d see how she felt toward him and he didn’t know how to react to it. And then other times, like right now, all he felt for her was sympathy and respect.
Sympathy for what her family’s violent demise had done to her and what was now happening to her. Respect because she was the first female prisoner they’d ever taken but yet she seemed to be tougher then the men. They’d had many male prisoners over the years. And they all broke. Not always quickly. The one thing he could say for the clan’s enemies was that they were not wimps. But within days and with torture much less intrusive then rape, they had broken.
Leave a Reply