Great, Deana and Rebecca are influencing Gloria, Evan thought, it can’t get any worse than that. His phone beeped again: We’re getting new bikinis. Reb said no excuses; you have to choose. Evan thought about that day in the school parking lot. Did he say something about bikinis? That was two lifetimes ago, before fucking his mother and his sister.
Evan reached for the MP3 player on his nightstand. Thanks to Cindy, he knew what he wanted to hear. After piling Deana’s pillow on top his, Evan laid against them and selected, Pale Sun, Crescent Moon, by the Cowboy Junkies. His cousin never said that was her favorite group, but she listened to them a lot. So did Evan, even though he’d never admit to liking them. Crescent Moon was an album filled with beautiful, happy, sad and meaningful lyrics. He cursed Cindy, knowing he would be more twisted up with conflicting emotions before long.
“Oh, love it’s so hard to explain
It’ll make you forget your name
It’ll turn you upside down
It’ll make you wish that you’d never been found.”
Songs paint a picture of real-life, Evan thought. If anybody was upside down, it was him. Was there any point in trying to turn his life right side up, if that was even possible? Of course, Evan had to figure it out. That was the right thing to do, wasn’t it?
On the way to the mall, Rebecca was riding shotgun; Deana and Gloria were in the back. Rebecca made a fuss, but Deana refused to make Gloria sit up front with Mrs. Stevens. It would have been weird, plus, she didn’t trust her girlfriend. Rebecca would try something right behind her mother just for the fun of it. Deana didn’t trust herself, either, not the way she had been acting lately. She let Evan fuck her after a firm decision had been made. Ten minutes later, she let him do her again. Then, she went to his room, asked him to fuck her again and fell asleep in his bed. How was that being careful?
Deana looked out the side window. In her mind, she was rehearsing her explanation. At the perfect moment, she’d tell Rebecca what happened. Even though Rebecca claimed she wanted it to happen, it still felt like cheating. Why had Deana changed her mind?
Mrs. Stevens pulled up to the curb in front of the mall. Rebecca opened her door and said, “Thanks, Mom.”
“Thanks, Mrs. Stevens,” Deana and Gloria echoed from the back.
“Remember, I’m going to be at Deana’s tonight, Mom.”
“Okay, but give me a call later,” Mrs. Stevens said. “Have fun, girls.” She pulled away.
The three girls entered the mall, and Rebecca whispered, “You have to tell me.”
So much for the perfect moment, Deana thought. “Shh.” She gestured at Gloria in front of them. “Later,” Deana said, hoping Gloria would run into one of her friends and go off with them for a while.
“The mall is dead on Mondays,” Gloria said.
Rebecca agreed, and Deana thought, fat chance we’ll get any alone time.
They stopped at the map in the middle of the main corridor. “Let’s see, we could go here first,” Rebecca said, pointing at number twelve, Victoria Secret.
“Yeah, let’s,” Gloria said. “I bet they have—”
“No,” Deana said. It was stupid being embarrassed in front of Gloria, but her cheeks flushed. “Your mother would kill me if I brought you home with lingerie.”
The odd expression on Rebecca’s face made Deana replay her words. Is that how she saw Candy now, as Gloria’s mother?
“Look,” Rebecca said, pointing behind Deana. “It’s your friend from gym class.”
She turned around. “You mean Evan’s wet dream from Social Studies.”
“Evan’s—” Gloria saw who they were talking about. “That’s Darlene.”
“You know her?” Deana asked.
“Everybody knows her,” Gloria said. “You had gym with her?”
“Twice,” Rebecca said with a smirk.
“How do you know her?” Deana asked.
“Seen her at the ballpark.”
“The ballpark—Whose game was she there for?” Deana asked.
“Not sure. She could have been watching my games, but she never sat in the bleachers. She always stayed off at a distance, walking around. Seen her with Becky, too. They’re friends.”
“She’s waving,” Rebecca said. “Here she comes.”
Deana nodded and watched. Darlene had a unique stride. If Deana didn’t know the redhead always walk that way, even naked in the shower room, she would have thought Darlene was trying to get everybody in the mall to notice her. The girl’s dense, curls bounced on her shoulders, and her chest danced in rhythm with the swish of her hips. Darlene’s pants looked like a two-hundred dollar pair of pre-worn jeans, but they were Levis that had been relentlessly abused by her thick thighs. From the girl’s knees to her groin, threadbare white slices expanded and contracted, revealing pale flesh. Deana knew the back was going to look like Candy’s Lee jeans, and she was already looking forward to seeing Darlene walk away. Why had she become so fascinated with her mother?
Gloria mumbled, “Double Trouble,” and Deana realized her sister was reading the words on Darlene’s shirt.
“Hey, Deedee,” Darlene said as she reached them. “Rebecca, Gloria, hi.”
Deana glanced at Gloria, surprised Darlene knew her name. “Hi. How are you?”
“Great,” Darlene said. “You?”
“Good,” Deana said.
“Evan here?”
“No,” Deana said. “Rebecca’s mom dropped us off.”
“Cool,” Darlene said. “What are ya’ll up to?”
“New bikinis,” Gloria said.
“Yeah, bathing suits,” Deana said.
“Unbelievable, me too,” Darlene said. “That’s crazy.”
“It is,” Rebecca said.
“Where you lookin’,” Darlene asked.
“I want one of those micro thong things,” Rebecca said. “A one-piece, you know, it wraps around here then goes around here, and…”
The girls watched Rebecca’s finger move around her neck, tits, and crotch, then Darlene said, “It’d take me a week to find one of those in here.” She pointed at her rump.
Gloria huffed. “If I go home with a micro, mini, thong anything, I’ll be coming back with Mom tomorrow to return it. Let’s go to rue21 or the Gap.”
“No, they don’t have any string things,” Rebecca said. “I looked online.”
“The two of you can go to the sexy, little butt shop,” Darlene said, “and I’ll go with Gloria where they have BB and B stuff.”
Rebecca cocked her head. “What?”
“Big butts and boobs,” Darlene said.
Deana expected Gloria to reject the suggestion, but she said, “That would be good. I don’t mind. I’ll go with Darlene.”
“That’s great,” Rebecca said.
“I guess,” Deana said.
“Give me your number,” Darlene said. “I’ll text you so we can hook up after.”
The last song on the album was nearing the end. Evan sat on the edge of his bed.
“It’s a fucked up ol’ world, but this ol’ girl
Well, she ain’t giving in”
It was fucked up, Evan thought, but he wasn’t giving in either. His father was in China, so fuck doing the right thing. He had an ample supply of supplements and lived with two women he could potentially have sex with. They had both told him the last time was the last time, but hadn’t he heard that before? Besides, later, the tumbler wanted him to stare at her ass in a bikini. He shivered at the thought of Deana and Rebecca bent over, demanding he judge their butts. Mm, that could turn into Jason’s three favorite words. There wasn’t anything for Evan to be disappointed or discouraged about.
He got up, grabbed a pair of boxers off the floor and pulled them on. After a shower, he’d talk to Candy or his mother, depending on who he found. That was a disturbing thought. When he encountered the sexy, strawberry-blonde, would he have to decide if it was Candy, his lover or Candy his mother? Maybe she would tell him what to do, thus proving he still had a mother. That was cause for concern. He and Deana were equals, so their interaction hadn’t been altered significantly, but Candy had been telling him what to do most of his life, and he had to obey or face the consequences. Things would be weird between them now.
Steam wavered up from the cup of coffee Candy was staring into. She watched it twist, turn and intertwine as it rose toward her face. Inhaling hastened the ascent of the lazy white streamers. She felt the moisture on her nose and the warmth spreading up through her nostrils. The smell made her tongue wet with anticipation. She could see the reflection of her face floating on the black surface. Her touch made the image roll with the waves. It appeared her face was swimming in a tranquil brook.
Candy pursed her lips and released a puff of air. The peaceful, swaying columns of steam crashed into the sides of the mug, circled, and frantically fought to escape the scalding liquid. The ripples distorted her face. The only thing missing was ominous dark clouds overhead. Her thoughts weren’t in a tranquil brook; they were riding a cyclone as Candy tried to figure out how to get what she wanted, and needed, but not what she’d have coming to her if John found out.
The sound of the shower turning on made Candy smile. She sipped her coffee and went to brush her teeth. After that, she would resolve the conflict she had created, once and for all.
As they walked in the opposite direction of Darlene and Gloria, Deana asked Rebecca, “Isn’t that weird? You think I should have sent Gloria with her?”
“Yeah, it’s awesome,” Rebecca said. “Tell me what happened. I can’t believe you haven’t told me already. Why didn’t you call me? I thought you weren’t going to do it? What changed your mind? Was it—”
“Stop!” Deana held up her hand. “If you stop asking questions for a second, and answer me, then I’ll tell you.”
“Sorry, I’m excited…it finally happened for you. This is huge.”
“How did you know?”
Rebecca grinned. “Your face is broadcasting I got fucked. Anybody can see that.”
“Shit, I hope not everybody. Gloria can’t know,” she said. “I was going to tell you as soon as we were alone. I didn’t think it would still be written on my face. Good thing I didn’t see my mother this morning.”
“How was it? Was it good…Did you get off?”
“Shh! You’re doing it again,” Deana said. “Shouldn’t we have stayed with them? Darlene—”
“Darlene is fine. What dah ya think, she knew we were coming here, and she has something planned for your sister?”
“No, of course not, but it is weird that she’s here alone on a Monday…to buy a bathing suit. She was friendly, too, in a strange way, you know, for Darlene.”
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