“You don’t look yourself today,” I comment, making him nod his head. He tells me how he thinks mother left because of him. He’s being too tough on himself.
I take the cookies from the oven, and let them cool down, and make him a drink while he sits in the center island, hands on the dark marble surface. I saw him drinking whisky with dad, with a couple of ice cubes, so I get him just that. At least he’s 21 and can drink, unlike nineteen year old Raphael. Somehow, I’m fixated on his muscles, and his veins, and I trail them with my fingertips, making him shiver.
“Do you think she’ll ever be back?” he asks, drinking it straight. I watch as his throat enlarges, the muscles and the veins, and can’t help but to feel hot. Coming to live with my dad was a mistake, I start to think. I never thought the constant masculine presence would get me into this stage of wanting sex all the time, but after tasting cum things took a wild turn.
“I’m not sure.”
Honesty has a price, and this time was the light of his eyes fading away. I let him rest his head on my shoulder again, and caressed his short hair between my fingers. He’s heavy on me, but I play strong, and let him take as much time as he needs.
“You remind me of her sometimes, you know? I’m sorry if we are such brutes.”
And time seems to stop, as I watch his lips moving slowly, as he say those words. “Its fine, Michael, I’m not a damsel in distress.”
He nods, humming into my neck. “I know you aren’t. You were always one of us, Shorty. I still remember when you broke Danni’s nose.”
His laugh is contagious, and I follow him closely, as the memory takes form in my head. I find myself getting him another glass, and he offers me some, just a taste, just to wet my lips, and I don’t really like it, it’s sour and burns my throat, but I’m happy to have him there, so close. I wonder what Raphael would do if he saw me now, almost flirting with his brother.
And my hand caresses his hair again, and trends down to his neck, in a slow movement as saying “look at me,” and it makes me wonder if Michael sees me the same way his brother does. Do I make him hard the same way? Are men all the same, unable to contain their erections even for family members, or will he be able to set the boundaries? He gives me more to drink and I found myself tipsy already, as the afternoon sun fades in the distance.
And his phone rings, it’s his girlfriend, they talk on the phone while I hold him from behind, letting his head against my chest and allowing my stepbrother to listen to my heart beat.
“It’s Natasha, we are going to the movies. Do you wanna come?” he asks, but I say no, politely, would be very awkward to be in the middle.
We hug, one last time, but when he stands up, the answer to my questions. A tent, right between his legs, is just before my eyes. I notice it, brushing my body against it, and he apologizes.
“Angel, this… I’m really sorry -”
“Don’t be silly, hormones and all. You’re lucky girls don’t show it that way.”
A wink, and another hug, and I let him go. I’m wetter than a lake, and gosh, with all the money from the tips on my fans page, I one hundred percent need to buy a dildo. I need something that resembles a penis to satisfy my curiosity. I cannot wait for father to return in five weeks’ time. That is way too long.
Saturday, 1st of April, 2023, Evening
Dear Diary,
Tomorrow will mark one week since Keira is gone. I wonder where she could be. If Azriel can’t find her (or won’t tell us where she is), I don’t think there’s any point for me to search for her.
Can’t shake the feeling she’s probably living a couple blocks away – need to stop reading weird stories. Let’s call it a night. I have a full day tomorrow, working all fucking day!
Again, what a foul mouth – dad will punish me when he’s back.
Saturday, 1st of April, 2023 – Late Evening
Dear Diary,
I’m shaking right now. I found out who took the key from my door. It was around midnight I heard a loud bang and went to investigate. I knew the twins wouldn’t be at home, neither would Michael, as they texted our group chat, but I didn’t know about Raphael. I tried to call him a few times, but he never replied, so I assumed he was with his friends.
Down there, in the kitchen, I find him a bit tipsy, with a few broken plates on the floor, shattered, and him trying to sort his own mess out. I immediately put my hands on the case, and join him, afraid he might cut himself.
We do it in silence, with myself wanting to tell him off because it’s fucking late, and because I’m mad at him for not saying anything.
“There, all done,” I comment, washing my hands. He’s looking very smart, with a shirt and jeans, and smart shoes, very unlike him. “You went on a date?” I ask, grabbing an apple and taking a bite.
He looks down, and then eyes me, from tits to vag, and a smirk forms between his red lips. “What if I was? Makes you jealous?”
“Don’t be stupid.”
Raphael takes the milk out of the fridge and pours generously into a cup. “You sleep like that?”
It’s like I’m being observed and only now realizing it, which causes me to put the milk away and call it a night. “You didn’t tell me about your date, so I assume it didn’t went well. You need to be less of a brute and start to be more caring if you want girls to like you. And don’t drink milk at this time, for fuck sakes. Go to bed.”
I’m not waiting around to hear what he has to say, and reenter my bed sheets, and the comfort of a well-made bed. I check my only fans account, and things seem pretty stable. I know I should have done a video, but can’t be bothered right now. I have a little more than one hundred people, which is fucking amazing, but in my little head, I would be on the millions by now and living in a mansion somewhere. Nope, not for me.
And then my bedroom door opens.
“Ralph?”
And it closes, while I look for the light switch, but his hand grabs mine before I can reach it.
“It’s only me,” he murmurs. There’s a little light coming from outside, he’s still wearing the same clothes it seems. “I was thinking about what you said.”
“It’s late already. What did I say? About your date?”
“Yes. How did you know?”
I caress his hand, there is a heartbeat near his thumb, and its speed is increasing. “A girl can tell these things. Nothing you could have done differently I’m sure.”
“But you said I need to be nicer.”
I hummed a yes.
“Why? Why did you said that? I was cracking jokes and everything, and she goes to the toilet and never returns.”
“Shit. Did you have to pay the whole thing?”
That made him cackle, lifting the mood a little bit.
“I did. She was skinny, so didn’t order much anyway.”
“Not like me then.”
Raphael let go a loud sigh. “Ah, shorty, if only she had your curves and tremendous appetite, I’d ravish her right there over the table.”
He tries to sit on the bed, but I don’t like street clothes on my heavenly sheets. “Go change, we can talk some more.”
But instead, he just throws his shoes to the corner and drops his jeans. He’s wearing a pair of black briefs that go perfectly around his ass. “Can I stay like this?” he asks, sitting down next to me, and taking my hand into his.
“You were very brute with me, I must say. Women want someone who gives them some romance as well. You can’t be that horny all the time.”
“Shorty, come on, how can I be less horny? It’s all I think about, honestly. We were having dinner and all I could think was if she could jerk me off as well as you did? I had a boner the whole time.”
“Maybe that was the reason she left?”
He squeezes my hand. “She was very trashy.”
“It’s all you attract. Glam trash.”
This makes him laugh. I get near him, my youngest brother, only nineteen. “So does this mean you still a virgin?”
We keep on making fun of one another for an eternity. When it comes to stick his penis inside a vagina, yes, he is a virgin, but he done a lot of other stuff according to him. “Don’t feel pressure with losing your virginity, its fine, all on its own time. Did you really wanted to think forever about this glamorous trashy naughty nasty skinny zombie girl?”
Leave a Reply