Another pause, longer this time. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to say here. But as your brother, I guess I’ll just ask you… Do you like this person you’re becoming?”
Fuck. I had no answer for that. “That concept is a bit too abstract for me to understand at this time,” I laughed. “So… You still coming back next week?”
“You know it. I’ll be bringing Kelly, so you guys will finally get to meet her. And maybe I’ll get to meet this guy you’re seeing?”
“Ha, um… Maybe…” Fuck! It was our brother!
“Alright, well, I got another class starting soon. I’ll see you next week, yeah?”
“Yeah, see you then. Thanks, Hank.”
We ended the call and I let out a deep breath. Did I like this person I was becoming? I liked being Zoey, liked feeling sexy and desired, liked how Keith made me feel whenever he touched me. But I was still a guy, and I think that was the hurdle I was having trouble with. Give up my masculinity, or give up this newfound happiness? Did I have to choose? I couldn’t figure out a middle ground.
I got a ping on my phone and checked the new message that came in, then groaned. Right. Forgot I had more problems.
Ellie: yo hows the cage hanging? wanna come over?
Me: Cage is fine. Sorry, can’t talk today. I’ll come over tmr
Ellie: ill hold you to that 😉
With a sigh, I threw my phone on my bed. Just after breakfast and I was already exhausted. I needed to feel productive. I wandered back out to the kitchen, where mom was still cleaning up.
“Help you with the dishes, mom?”
She looked over in surprise, but smiled genially and assigned me to drying. As we worked in tandem, she casually slipped into conversation. “I noticed you were uncomfortable with the conversation at breakfast,” she murmured. “Is there something bothering you?”
I was quiet for a while before mustering the gall to speak my mind. “Why does dad have to talk about Ellie like that?”
Mom sighed and nodded sympathetically. “I think your father just doesn’t understand. We grew up with the world one way, and now the world is another. You’ll understand when you’re our age, some things take more getting used to.”
“I guess.” We were quiet until we finished the dishes, and she thanked me for the help. Something was still bothering me, this time from last night. I’d told Keith I loved him. We brothers weren’t the type to say that to one another as family. So… had I meant it some other way? I didn’t want to think about it, but… “Mom? How did you know you loved dad?”
She looked surprised for a moment before settling into a wistful smile. “You’ve heard the story a hundred times.”
But never with the mindset I currently had. “Tell me anyway.”
She sighed, gazing out the window, reliving the moment in her head. “I had snuck out to go partying with my friends. Your mother was young once, too, you know. I was on my way back home after parting with my friends when I was stopped by a group of three guys. I don’t like to think about what they’d have done if your father hadn’t shown up. But he did, and he told them to leave me alone. At the time, he was a scrawny little kid, much like you. Did you know that?”
My eyes widened as we moved to sit down at the table. “No, you never told me that.”
Mom chuckled, even as her brow furrowed when she continued. “They beat the stuffing out of him. By the time they were done, somebody else had seen and called the cops, and they ran off. And the first thing your father said to me, as he lay bloody and bruised on the curb… was ask if I was okay. And I just wouldn’t leave him alone after that.”
Mom laughed, and I couldn’t help but smile as well. They seemed so different from now, it was hard to believe. “I’ve only ever heard you tell the story, never dad. Is it ’cause he got beaten up?”
She shook her head, smiling while she combed my hair a bit with her fingers. “It’s because he didn’t do it for glory. He did it because I needed him. Because he’s a good man. He doesn’t boast about those things.” She sighed again, a bit more solemn now. “I know you and your father don’t always get along. But for better or worse, he’s still the same man he was then.” She stood up and kissed me on the forehead. “I hope you find a love like that, sweetie, no matter who it is.”
She thanked me for talking with her and left me to my thoughts, which was a good thing. She thought I was more like dad than I thought, but the truth was all I saw was Keith. Keith was the real man, somebody who would stand up for people who needed him. And… And I was falling just like mom had.
Fuck. Enjoying the feeling of Keith’s cock and cum was one thing. But was I really falling in love with him?
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