Son! Its wrong – Chapter 5

As we lay together in the silence, that beautiful after sex silence, when you’ve shared a spiritual bonding with someone that you love more than anyone else in the world. I held her to me, and she, me to her. Mum was shaking with the emotion of the moment. Silence was all that was needed, words would have been an unwelcome intruder resented by both of us.

When she moved her head and our eyes at last met, she looked so serene. I said to her, “you came with me, it seemed all right, but it wasn’t as good for you as before, I’m sorry.”

“This was your time Alex, you’d done me so completely, like no one else ever has. You needed to receive something from me to be as powerful as what you did for me. It’s ok though, if you’d turned out the light and let me focus totally on what you were doing to me, I probably would have come as hard as before. But then again, I’m not sure that this old body would have been able to take another one like that. It was so very intense, it was a total experience for me.” There was so much love in her as she said, “you will do that every time for me, won’t you, please?”

I nodded, I was feeling pretty good about myself.

“Now,” said Mum, thinking that maybe my guard was down, “who’s this woman that’s taught you to do these things to me, what’s her name?”

I laughed, seeing right through her, “Her name’s Jane.”

“Jane?”

“Jane Clarke.”

“Do I know her?”

“I don’t think so, she lives over in the next street.”

“Will I meet her?”

“Dunno, maybe at some time, but now I have to ask you something.”

“Yes, of course.”

“What’s brought this on, you know, you and I?”

Mum closed her eyes, contemplating her answer for a moment, then said, “a lot’s been happening in my life for a while now. Since I’ve turned forty I’ve found it hard to accept my age. Society makes a woman feel as if her life’s ended at forty, and yet I don’t feel old, even though your Dad keeps telling me that I am. I think he does that because he does feel his age, and he wants to bring my self esteem down. I’ve found it harder and harder lately to say no when other men hit on me, especially when your fathers idea of sex just isn’t what it used to be, and it certainly isn’t what mine is anyway.”

“Mum, if what I’ve heard for the last two times that you’ve had sex is how it’s become, you’ve certainly got something to complain about.”

“Two times, you’ve heard us twice. I knew that you were in the room on Saturday night.” She paused thinking, “so then you must have heard us after you and I came back from the cinema?”

“Yes I did, and I need to know why you let him have you that night, for me it spoiled the evening that we’d just had, that was our night, a very special night, and hearing him having you just shattered me, why did you do it with him?”

“Alex, I wanted to make love with you so, so much that night, but I just couldn’t bring myself to take that huge step then, so I left you my clothes as a sort of consolation prize. But I hadn’t thought it through completely, because of course, when I got into the room, I was naked. I didn’t want to wake him up going into my drawers looking for a nightgown, so when I got into bed and he turned into me, he felt that I was naked, and thought that I wanted sex, so how could I explain it away if I didn’t let him have me?”

“But you enjoyed it?”

“Yes, I always enjoy it to some extent, but you saw tonight just what I can be with some real love and attention applied to me, didn’t you?”

“Yes, there’s a bit for me to work with that’s for sure.”

Mum then looked down, “damn there’s a wet spot,” and then getting out of bed, started walking towards the door.

“Where’re you going?”

“I think that you and I have some unfinished business in the shower from this morning, and then because of that wet spot, we’re just forced to have to sleep in my bed.” She turned smiling, “but only if that’s all right with you?”

“That’s cool ma, in fact I think I’ll like having you in that bed, even more than in mine.”

“I thought you might somehow. Now, when am I going to meet your lady…Jane, right?”

“Yes it’s Jane, but why do you want to meet her?”

“Oh I just thought it might be fun, this is the new me, I’m forty four in two months, and I think it’s about time I had my mid life crisis, you know try some new things. Look for new horizons, that sort of thing, I’m sure you can understand that. But for now it’s time for us to revisit the shower, are you coming lover?”

She stopped as a thought struck her, “Lover, it’s got such a ring to it hasn’t it? My lover my son, my son my lover, yes a very nice ring to it, if I may say so.”

Like every good son, I never argued with my Mum, I just agreed, and of course, my Mother my lover, my lover my Mother, sounded just as good to me.