“What did she say?” asked Bree, laughing even louder.
“Lois says she can’t believe us crazy bitches,” snickered Ally.
“I guess we’ll have to wait for Sandy to hear the story,” replied Bree. “As soon as she’s done letting those two guys feel her up.”
Ally turned and looked out the back window.
“Hell, my gynecologist doesn’t give me that good an examination,” laughed Ally, trying to control her giggling. “These two are being very thorough. It looks like one of them may be a proctologist.”
Both Ally and Bree had another giggling fit.
“They hid us in the office while the police were looking for us,” said Lois sullenly. “Sandy gave both of them blow jobs by way of saying thank you.”
“Bareback?” asked Ally, sounding concerned.
“Oh, hell no!” replied Lois. “I made them go get condoms from the pharmacy aisle.”
“And you?” asked Ally.
“No fucking way,” spat Lois vehemently. “I let them feel me up a little. That’s all!”
“Did they feel up your COUCHIE?” snickered Bree, trying to constrain her giggling.
“Don’t be vulgar!” snapped Lois, turning to face Bree with an indignant look on her face.
Bree returned Lois’ stare, looking at her questioningly with a raised eyebrow before Lois relented and finally answered the question meekly.
“Oui,” said Lois softly.
“So! How did you get past the police?” asked Ally.
“They gave us these ponchos and walked us down one side of the store while two other managers took the police and the two bitches that filed the complaint down an aisle on the other side of the store and back to the office,” answered Lois. “The first manager Sandy gave a blow job used Sandy’s credit card to check us out so the baskets were waiting up front.”
“Well that was kind of them,” said Ally. “Certainly worth a couple of blow jobs. Don’t you think Bree?”
“Sounds reasonable to me,” agreed Bree, winking at Ally in the rearview mirror. “Especially with a couple of couchie feelies to boot.”
“Fuck both of you bitches!” sulked Lois irritably as she turned and huddled in the corner of the back seat again.
“One of us had better go reel Sandy in,” said Bree as she looked through the rearview mirror. “At the rate she’s going, they’re going to have her bent over the trunk and slipping her the high hard one any moment now.”
“Bree’s right,” agreed Lois, perking up suddenly. “The one that got the condoms bought a twelve pack.”
“Optimistic little horndog isn’t he,” snickered Bree.
“Yeah, you’re both right,” replied Ally. “Get the car running and I’ll round her up before we all end up in jail, including her two new admirers.”
~~~~~
The ride home provided Bree and Ally an opportunity to hear both sides of the sordid tale. Apparently aside from a few nasty looks from some of the women shoppers and the constant leering by the men they encountered, things went reasonably well as they found the juice aisle for the tomato juice. There were only three or four minor shopping cart collisions and one case stack of Gatorade knocked over.
“Cleanup on aisle 13,” was the last thing they heard as they headed toward the produce department to pick up the celery. The coast was clear as they went down the aisle to pick up the celery salt and Lois said she breathed a sigh of relief.
Being the compulsive shopper that she was, Sandy found something on every aisle that she wanted to buy and they had to get a second cart.
Things went south as they passed in front of the meat department. Starving for attention, as Sandy was wont to do, and ever the exhibitionist, Sandy couldn’t resist asking one of the butchers where to find the salami.
“Excuse me!” Sandy had asked the rough looking 50ish butcher. “Where do you keep the big salamis. Us girls are going to play ‘Hide the Salami’ tonight. What kind do you think would work best.”
“You really said that?” asked Bree with an incredulous look on her face as she turned to stare at Sandy in the front seat next to her.
“Well, I figured if anyone would know, it would be him,” replied Sandy, playing coy.
“I think that’s when we drew a crowd,” deadpanned Lois at her most droll from the back seat.
“Yeah, including those two uptight bitches,” added Sandy.
“They’re the ones who called the police?” asked Ally.
“Yeah, I think so,” answered Sandy. “All because we were a little underdressed and having a good time along with the fellas around us.”
“You don’t think calling them a couple of uptight cunts had anything to do with it?” asked Lois from the back seat.
“Well, maybe a little,” replied Sandy, trying to stifle a laugh.
“Was that the only thing you said?” Bree asked Sandy, sensing there was more to it.
“Well, I did tell them that they should both go do something,” said Sandy, pausing for effect. “I seriously doubt that those two ugly bitches hadn’t already been doing it on their own for year anyway―and probably with a vibrator.”
“Telling them to go fuck themselves doesn’t seem that outrageous under the circumstances,” suggested Ally, enjoying this bit of repartee.
“I think it had more to do with Sandy telling them they would have to take the sticks out of their fat asses first,” said Lois, helpfully clarifying the conversation.
“Oh!” exclaimed Bree. “Did they?”
“What? Take the sticks out?” said Sandy, her turn to deadpan. “Or were you asking about their fat asses?”
All four women began giggling uncontrollably.
“Well, we never did see the sticks,” replied Sandy finally. “So I can’t say for sure.”
~~~~~
The good natured banter had continued between the four friends all the way back to the ranch. Bree’s car became a sort of time machine, briefly transporting the women back two years, before the pandemic, to an easier time when their lives centered around sex, shopping, fun and each other.
For the time it took them to drive back to the ranch, the four friends were once again the carefree trophy wives, the sex kittens they had been before Covid―the same oversexed, man hungry sluts who had fucked each other and each other’s husbands for years.
Now they were a couple of years older, and perhaps not any wiser, as they had moved on to fucking their sons and stepsons. It wasn’t anything they wanted to discuss, but they were all aware that they were breaking new, uncharted ground and approached it with a sort of reckless bravado.
~~~~~
Saturday Evening / Day 9
“Jesus, it’s late,” exclaimed Sandy as she got out of the car once they reached the house. “What are we going to do about dinner?”
“The boys are preparing it?” replied Lois calmly as she stepped out of the back seat right behind Sandy. “We’ve been texting back and forth. Barbequed ribeye’s, homemade Caesar salad and garlic bread. We’re keeping it simple. Oh! And leftover brownies and ice cream for dessert.”
“Sounds good to me, Bobby Flay!” replied Sandy, giving Lois a wink.
As the four women reached the front door, Bree turned and smiled wickedly at the other women.
“Are you girls ready to watch their eyeballs bulge out?” asked Bree as she pulled her U-neck cowl open to reveal her breasts and new nipple rings. The other three women followed suit as they stepped through the door, their mesh G-strings peeking out from the bottoms of their short dresses.
As the four women strutted across the great room, they continued to banter with each other, sounding like giddy teenagers. The women giggled even more when they saw four heads swivel around like Linda Blair in the Exorcist, to gawk at them.
“What’s up boys?” taunted Sandy. “See something you like?”
“I think we can already see what’s up,” whispered Bree to Ally as they exchanged wicked smiles.
“Fuck mom!” shouted Mike. “You all look so hot! DAMN!”
“You’re the hottest bitches I’ve ever seen!” boomed Andy, leering at the four mothers.
“Thanks―I think?” replied Bree, giving her son the evil eye.
“I’d offer you a penny for your thoughts,” added Ally. “But I’m afraid you’d tell me. Especially you, Andy―you naughty boy!”
Everyone laughed.
“We’re going to head out to the kitchen and see how the culinary staff are doing,” said Lois as the other three women followed her, making sure to get their breasts and asses swaying in opposite directions for the benefit of their audience.
“By the way, how are we going to divvy up the boys tonight?” whispered Sandy to Ally as she sidled up next to her as they walked.
“Why don’t we discuss it at dinner,” whispered Ally back. “That should make for some interesting conversation.”
“Sounds good to me,” replied Sandy. “Just as long as Bree and I don’t end up with―”
“Oh, don’t worry about that,” reassured Ally before Sandy could complete the thought. “We’ll make sure that’s part of the ground rules, tonight and moving forward.”
“Well, how are my young chefs doing on their own,” said Lois as she stepped into the kitchen. Dan, Nick and Josh’s eyes widened as they saw Lois in her revealing dress for the first time. The three boys’ eyes got even wider when Sandy, Bree and Ally followed Lois into the kitchen, breasts and nipple rings hanging out of their revealing dresses.
“You boys better put your tongues back in your heads,” drawled Sandy with a laugh, “before you accidentally cut them off with one of them there knives.”
They all laughed.
“Jesus mom!” said Dan breathily. “You look totally fucking hot!”
“Thank you, MPD!” squealed Lois with delight. “That’s so sweet of you to say, mon amour.”
“Fuck the brownies for dessert,” blurted Nick as his eyes fixated on Sandy’s ornamented breasts.
“Aren’t you sweet,” gushed Sandy, seeing where Nick’s eyes were laser focused as she basking in the attention. “Would you like some whipped cream on them too?”
“Ahh―yeah,” answered Nick, gulping self-consciously. “And maybe someplace else too.”
“Ummmh! You wicked little boy!” cooed Sandy. “I AM impressed with your culinary choices.”
“I guess we know who’s behind door number one for you tonight,” whispered Ally sarcastically into Sandy’s ear.
“Hush!” hissed Sandy quietly, as she flashed Ally a wicked smile. “Don’t interrupt my flirtin’ with that big hunk of manhood!”
“You all look spectacular,” said Josh, speaking for the first time as he stepped from behind the counter and kissed Ally on the cheek.
“I take it you spent some time at the salon too,” added Josh. “You all look radiant.”
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