Truth or Dare with My… Mom? Ch. 01

Literotic asexstories – Truth or Dare with My… Mom? Ch. 01 by BiscuitHammer,BiscuitHammer Disclaimer: All characters engaging in active sexual activity are at least 18 years of age. Reviews and constructive criticisms welcome; flames and critiques of no substance will be snickered at and deleted. Enjoy!

Author’s Note: This is a slow-burn story. Buckle in for a long ride if you intend to read.

***

Well, that Friday night sucked.

My mom was going out on her own date, meaning I would have the place to myself. So I’d invited the girl I was seeing over and was planning on getting inside her, when she called at the last moment and not only cancelled, but said she was seeing someone else and we wouldn’t be dating anymore.

What shocked me was the dude she was tossing me over for- Kevin Layng. He was short, skinny, kinda dorky, and, as I knew from being in the locker room with him in senior year of high school, nothing to brag about in the manhood department. So either she had a thing for controlling wimpy guys, or ol’ Kevin had something on her and she was dating him to keep it hushed.

Whatever. Best of luck to him. I’d just need to reel in and cast out again. There were lots more fish out there in the water, and Gina wasn’t the catch of all catches. I just enjoyed that she had a speech impediment- she couldn’t say ‘no’.

The smug satisfaction of thinking about that li’l train wreck of a relationship was soon soured by remembering that my evening had been scuttled. It was getting on to too late to call anyone else, and frankly, I was rather bent out of shape, meaning I’d be less than perfect company for any gal I went out with. Guess I’m stuck at home.

I’d invited Gina over because I was horny, but now I was just grumpy. I sat at the kitchen coffee table, staring sullenly at the far wall and nursing a beer. I wasn’t quite of legal drinking age yet, but I knew mom didn’t care, as long as I didn’t get into the hard stuff and didn’t get smashed, leaving a mess for her to clean up. It wasn’t even good beer, just Molson domestic.

So here I had the place to myself, and no girl to get laid with. What would I do? Sure, I could go upstairs and watch porn on my desktop, but that seemed like small consolation after getting dumped. Did I watch a DVD or some subscription porn on the big TV in the entertainment room? Only mildly better, really, not to mention that if I paid for a title, I was stuck watching it, even if it turned out to be a dud.

Go and blow shit up on my computer with my friends in some co-op game? That was a viable means of getting my annoyance out. I’d just have to endure being razzed about slinking back to play after blowing them all off to go on a date. And to be honest, I’d deserve it, because I would’ve razzed any of them. That’s the kind of friends we were.

My musings were brought to an end when I heard the front door open and then slam.

Mom back already? I frowned and looked down at my phone, sitting on the table. It was just after nine. Had something gone wrong?

Mom came almost stomping into the kitchen, looking very sullen, and she didn’t notice me at first. She was muttering to herself as she futzed around at one of the counters, trying not to smack things she took out of her purse down on the surface. I couldn’t help but notice how she was dressed, and had to admit, she was a fine woman for someone who was not even forty, with lush, dark hair, brown eyes, and a great figure. Her outfit was decidedly not one she’d wearing to her teaching job. On anyone who wasn’t my mother, that definitely would have been a ‘fuck me’ outfit for me.

But this was on my mother, and it was still a ‘fuck me’ outfit. The skirt was snug and rather short. Her blouse was silky and sexy, rather unusually tight across her chest, reminding me that she sported some generous tits. Her long legs were encase in dark stockings.

Yep, definitely a ‘fuck me’ outfit, even though it was on my mom. My friends who kept making comments about her MILF status weren’t wrong, I admit. I’d seen her in bathing suits and bikinis before, and objectively she was hot, but I made sure I was always assessing her through my ‘son’ glasses, I guess. My friends probably had a more honest perspective than I did. To me, she was mom, the kindergarten and grade school teacher.

“Asshole…” she grumbled, slapping her car keys down on the surface. “I shaved my cunt and didn’t wear panties for this?”

My eyebrow was only just rising at overhearing that sentiment. Wasn’t very often I heard her swear, and I don’t recall ever hearing ‘cunt’ from her before. Mom turned around and then yelped when she saw me sitting at the little coffee table in the other corner of the kitchen. She fell back against the counter, holding her chest, her eyes wide and starting to breathe loudly.

“Jesus, Aaron!” she gasped, almost clasping her throat as she tried to control herself. “What the Hell?!”

“I was wondering the same thing about you too, mom,” I said somewhat dully. “I take it your date night didn’t work out either?”

Her eyes darkened at the query and she seemed to be overtaken by grumpy again, forgetting her shock. She scowled and folded her arms, looking off at some indeterminate point on a wall. Despite the scowl on her face, I couldn’t help noticing how pretty she was. Even if she was pretty pissed off.

“Mild understatement,” she muttered. “Suffice to say that Ted and I are through.”

“Holla,” I said, holding up my beer. “I got the heave-ho tonight as well, before my evening began.”

“Gina dumped you?” she asked, her eyes widening for a moment and then concern coming into them, her mothering instinct taking over. “What happened, baby?”

I shrugged somewhat dully. “She decided to go out with Kevin Layng instead of me.”

Mom seemed very confused. “Kevin Layng? But he’s skinny, dorky, and has a little dick.”

My eyes widened at her. “Why do you know that?”

She shrugged. “Moms talk. But why him? Does he have something on her?”

“I was wondering that too,” I sighed, taking another swig of my beer. “That, or she has a fetish for wimpy guys she can control.”

“Either way, you can do better than a slag like her, baby,” mom announced, turning back to the counter and resuming arranging the contents of her purse. I had a view of her from the side now, and I had to admit again, my friends weren’t wrong. Mom kept herself in good shape, clearly, since she had a tight butt under that skirt, and her tits were definitely nothing to scoff at. Even in her blouse, you knew they were good stuff. Her dark hair was silky and thick, made for pulling on when you fucked her from be-

Wait, what the Hell was I thinking?!

“So I got cancelled on by my bitch ex,” I sighed, shaking my head. “What about you?”

“I don’t think you need to know, Aaron,” she said as she futzed with the contents of the clutch. “Not the sort of thing moms discuss with their sons.”

“You would if I was your daughter,” I pointed out. “Mom, I’m nearly nineteen, and I care,” I said, still watching her. “I wanna know if I need to go and kick the crap out of Ted. Because I totally could, you know.”

She paused and turned to look at me for a moment, observing me. “You could, couldn’t you?” she mused. “No, he didn’t do anything to disgrace me, if that’s what you’re asking, but he was something of a…”

“Douche?” I offered.

“Well, yes,” she relented. “He was a douche. We had just started our date over drinks when he began talking about the need for a threesome to happen. He didn’t mind whether it was me and another woman with him, or me with him and another guy, but he wanted to make it happen. And, conveniently, he just happened to have the numbers of a man or a woman who would no doubt be game.”

She folded her arms again and scowled at her point on the wall. “Needless to say, our date ended promptly. He even had the nerve to ask if I could drive him home afterward. Douche…”

“Yeah, not the best date to have gone to the trouble of shaving for, mom,” I laughed before catching myself and shutting up tight. Mom’s eyes widened and she blushed rather furiously.

“You heard that, hm?” she mumbled, looking at the floor now.

“I… yeah…” I admitted, feeling like an idiot now. “Seriously, though, it’s not a big deal, mom. I know you’re not out dating to find a new life partner, which kinda narrows down the reasoning. I mean, I’m not dating to find the right girl for the rest of my life, am I?”

“Well, of course not, but you’re a horny teenage boy, you’re supposed to be out trying to get laid,” she sighed, gesturing somewhat helplessly with one hand. “What’s my excuse?”

“You’re a human being and a pretty woman with needs who likes the dopamine rush of getting laid,” I reasoned. “You’re not a nun, mom. Dad’s been outta the picture for a long time now, and good riddance. Am I supposed to expect you to act like some uptight old spinster?”

She sighed and her posture sagged a little. “Well, no, but it’s hard to admit in front of your own son that you’re out there trying to get a little action. I don’t want you thinking less of me.”

“I wouldn’t mom; I’d think there was something wrong if you weren’t,” I said simply. “And I’m sorry Ted turned out to be yet another douche.”

“Seems to be my luck,” she moped, ripple-tapping her fingers against her arm while she gazed at our floor. “So we both lost out big tonight. I’m sorry, baby. Yours didn’t even get off the ground, and the choice was made for you.”

“Probably for the best,” I said, shrugging with both hands on my beer. “Since you were gonna be out, I’d invited Gina back here. Was planning on taking advantage of the big screen.”

“Naughty boy,” mom laughed. “Maybe it’s just as well she cancelled, since my date was a dud, and I would’ve come back to see my son horizontal and superimposed with some little slag on my good carpet.”

“Mom!” I laughed, shaking my head while she giggled. “Yeah, might’ve been awkward.”

“Not to mention the hasty retreat I’d have to beat upstairs and stay locked in my bedroom until you finished,” she added. “I would’ve already been frustrated, and knowing that two horny teens were having hot jungle-monkey sex in my living room might’ve made things… worse.”

“Worse?” I asked.

Mom blushed again. “I date so that I don’t keep killing off my battery-operated toys,” she mumbled. “I have needs, you know, always had ’em.”

I knew mom was rather adventurous back years ago when she met dad, but this was a weird conversation to be having a Friday night, but we were both feeling pretty raw and rather resentful, clearly. Venting was what we wanted.

So why not?

“It’s gettin’ on to too late for either of us to salvage the evening by going out, so we can just sit here at the table and complain,” I suggested. “It’s what we both wanna do, after all, shred our exes.”

“But you’re my son, I can’t vent about that with you,” she said rather uncertainly. “I mean, you don’t need to know those things about me.”

“Mom, I already know you shaved and didn’t wear underwear tonight,” I pointed out. “It beats thinkin’ you’re repressed somehow.”

“I most certainly am not, young man,” she huffed, looking somewhat indignant at the inference. “It’s just a weird situation to ponder.”

“Look, you can sit here and bitch about how much people suck with me, or you can go to your room and murder another toy,” I pointed out. “Now at the end of the day, which is actually more therapeutic?”

She considered for a moment. “Honey, I have a lot of bitching to do. Tonight wasn’t the first night Ted pissed me off. And I may start ranting about other guys as well.”

“Well, just don’t start crapping on me for the crime of being a guy, and it sounds like we have a good evening planned,” I said with a shrug. “Come sit, I’ll get you a beer, and we’ll warm up some pizza.”

“Pizza, beer, and complaining,” she muttered, relenting and coming over to the table finally, sitting down across from me. “It’s like university all over again.”

“That’s the spirit,” I said as cheerfully as I could as I stood up and went to the fridge to get the beer I’d offered her along with leftover pizza. “Sounds like we both need it.”

Half an hour later…

Mom was still grumbling, and I listened intently. She took another pull on her beer, made a face and scowled at it. “Ugh, domestic…”

I shrugged. “Y’want wine, that’s something you do with girlfriends while you complain about how much men suck. We can switch to that later. I’m your son, and I offered beer.”

“Fine,” she said, pointing the lip of her bottle at me. “But after a few of these, you do at least one bottle of wine with me.”

“Okay, fair,” I said. Wine wasn’t my preference, but I was perfectly capable of drinking it when called upon. “You were saying about Ted?”

“Oh right,” she remembered, her countenance darkening for a moment before starting in again. “He wasn’t keen on giving oral, thought it made him look effeminate. He was more than happy to receive it, mind. And the few times I did manage to get it from him? Hardly worth the effort.”

“Three outta ten, would not recommend?” I chuckled.

“Let some other dumb bitch find out he’s got the tongue skills of a chimp on Thorazine,” she grumbled before taking another pull, and then shoving a piece of pizza into her mouth. She waved the back of her hand at me to indicate it was once again my turn. “Teh muff abouf Gifa.”

“Well…” I began, considering what exactly to tell her. She was still my mom, the schoolteacher, after all, but this had been my idea, so holding back seemed unfair. “Like I said, it was easy enough to get her to skin off her panties, so there’s that.”

“Did you use protection, or was she on some form of birth control?” mom asked after she swallowed her pizza.

“She was on birth control, seemingly, but I always had condoms handy in case she’d had one of her flighty days and had forgotten to take the pill. I used to make her time it so that I could watch her take them at school during lunch. That way I knew she remembered.”

“And then it was rawdog city?” she snickered. “Not that I blame you, Aaron, it does feel so much better without a condom in the way.”

“I’ll take ‘things I never expect to hear from my mom’ for a million, Alex,” I chuckled.

“This was your idea, young man,” she pointed out. “And I am indeed venting and getting things off my chest. It’s not like I’ve started fussing over you.”

“And for that I am thankful, mom,” I said, raising my beer in salute.

“Besides…” she almost murmured, looking a tad awkward and blushing, “I’m a woman, and I like the feeling of a guy busting a nut inside me.”

“Make that two million, Alex,” I sighed, shaking my head and smirking.

We talked and vented, and I was on my fourth beer while mom was on her third. We’d killed off the leftover pizza and now I was heating up junky Chinese food. Sometimes, it was exactly what you needed, and this was one of those moments.

Mom sighed as she stirred around the noodles in her bowl with her chopsticks. “Aaron, how often do you get laid?” she asked rather quietly. “I just wanna know, because if you’re the teenage average, then I wanna see how far behind the curve I am. I used to not be, after all.”

I shrugged, not really bothered by the question at this point. “I mean, if I’m honest, I probably get laid a little more often than your average teen, mom, because Gina was always good to go. And what do we mean by ‘getting laid’ specifically? Do I need to be inside her? Does getting oral from her count in a dark classroom at school?”

Mom giggled. “Questions I’ve tried to never ponder about my son. Well, okay, not true, I have spent time thinking about your sex life.”

“You’re my mom, so that doesn’t surprise or bother me,” I said. “It just means you care.”

“I do,” she confirmed. “But back to my question. How often do you get laid? Let’s define it broadly as another person giving you an orgasm directly.”

I had to think about it. Finally I answered. “Well, including getting blown, then about four times a week.”

“Definitely more than me, but nowhere near as big a gap as I expected,” she said.

“Well, I’m kinda busy, you know,” I reasoned. “And it’s not like it’s one-and-done orgasms, sometimes there’s marathon sessions with many orgasms. But I’m lumping those all together as one ‘getting laid’ event.”

“Oh,” she murmured, blushing a little. “You must hardly ever need to take care of yourself.”

I guess I was feeling unusually honest. “That’s a twice-a-day thing at least for me, mom, unless I got laid, in case maybe once.”

Her eyes widened at me and then she began giggling and blushing more. “I’m sorry, I forgot about how horny and virile young men can be.”

“So get yourself a young man to see to your needs,” I reasoned, although I never would’ve believed I was saying it to my mother outside of this context. “Not like I’m gonna judge you.”

Mom was still giggling and blushing. “You think your old mom oughta be a cougar and go out to get fucked by a young man?”

“I mean, don’t bring him home or I’ll wanna beat the shit outta him,” I qualified. “I know young men, after all. But it would be nice to know you’re getting your needs met.”

“Have you ever been with an older woman?” she asked out of the blue.

That question caught me off-guard. “What?”

“C’mon, boy,” she urged, smirking. “Have you ever had sex with a cougar?”

My turn to blush.

“Oh my goodness, you have,” she breathed, her eyes dancing with excitement. She leaned forward on the table and put her chin on her hands. “Tell me. No, wait!”

She drained her beer and then got up and wiggled quickly over to her wine cabinet, grabbing a bottle of red and two glasses. “This is a wine conversation, so finish your beer by the time I get back. Go go go!”

I sighed and gulped my beer, knowing there was no point in protesting. Mom was back only a moment later, uncorking the bottle and pouring into the two glasses, making them rather full. This was serious business, apparently. She pushed mine across to me.

“Now, continue,” she said, taking a sip and resting her chin on her hand again. “Tell me about my little boy’s trip to MILFland.”

“Only if you promise to never say that again,” I muttered, making her snicker. Mom thought she was the funniest person on the planet. Always had. “Fine. It was… Mrs. Marshall.”

“The history teacher?!” mom gasped, looking shocked. “You fucked your history teacher?!”

“I… yeah…” I admitted, now blushing.

She regarded me curiously for a moment. “Was that the semester you were failing History and all of a sudden your grade in the class jumped for no particular reason?” she asked.

I didn’t answer quickly enough, clearly, because she burst out laughing, almost spilling her wine. I’d seen my mom laugh countless times before, but not very often like this, losing control to her mirth entirely. It was quite the insight, along with everything else I was finding out about her.

“Ohhhhh, my horny and sneaky little boy,” she almost wheezed, her eyes shining, almost glistening with tears of mirth. “You fucked your way to an A? I’m so proud of you, Aaron!”

I waited while mom kept snickering, not feeling irked so much as slightly needled. “Well, didn’t you ever fuck someone to get what you needed?” I asked rather pointedly.

Mom finally arrested her laughter and stared at me, trying to decide if she could tell me. “Well, yes,” she admitted finally. “More than a few times when I was younger, and mayyyyybe sometimes since then, possibly once or twice at work to nick a project or outcome I wanted.”

She blushed a little. “Not ashamed of me for that, are you?”

“Hell no,” I replied, shaking my head. “You get shit done, mom. It’s just sex, right?”

“How many times did you have to boff Mrs. Marshall to get that A, baby?” she asked, going back to smirking.

“Well, three times,” I copped. “Once might’ve done it, but I was enjoying it, gotta admit.”

“And with a married woman, too,” mom breathed, fanning herself. “My slutty li’l boy.”

“Thanks, mom,” I muttered. “You ever been the other woman?”

The air went dead as she heard the question. Had I gone too far?

“Yes,” she said finally. “Well, maybe, depends on how you define ‘the other woman’, really. I’ve had no-strings sex with a married person or two, but I was never involved in some torrid affair that would destroy a marriage. What your father did hits too close to home for that to happen.”

“Sorry,” I said, shaking my head. “You know I resent the Hell outta him too, mom. If I could give him a kidney boulder in his dick, I would.”

“Well, that’s more merciful than the leprosy I’ve wished on his dick,” she said simply, waving it off. “But yes, I’ve had the occasional sexual interaction with a married person behind the scenes. Not necessarily proud of it, but to the best of my knowledge, no harm done.”

“Well that’s good,” I said, nodding. “And now I don’t… married person, mom?”

Mom said nothing.

“Married men, you mean,” I ventured.

Mom stayed tight-lipped.

It was some seconds before I spoke again, calculating and permutating. “Mom, are… are you bi?”

Mom finally sighed and sagged, nodding. “Yes, Aaron, and I guess I always have been. I was having sex with girls before I’d been with a guy, in fact.”

“Huh, cool,” I mused, nodding.

Mom raised an eyebrow. “Cool?”

“Well, yeah,” I replied, shrugging now. “My mom’s bisexual.”

“Is this some sort of bragging right in the locker room?” she asked levelly. I could tell her tone was getting dangerous, which wasn’t unusual for her, but was no doubt ramped by the beer, wine, and the confessional of the past hour.

I shook my head. “No, mom, nothing like that,” I assured her. “I just meant that I really don’t care if you’re straight, gay, or bi. Fact of the matter is, you being bi increases your chances of getting laid, which is good, and if you’re having sex with other women, then I don’t need to worry about guys getting my mom dirty.”

“Aaron,” she said in a chiding mutter, blushing furiously. “I can look after myself, you know.”

“I know, but I’m a guy, and since you’re related to me, I’m still kinda possessive of you,” I reasoned. “I don’t want slimy guys or boys getting their creep on with you.”

“But it’s okay if girls do it,” she said rather flatly. It was a dare to answer.

“Mom, we’re not dating or married, you’re not getting me in an inescapable trap like this, that’s strictly for husbands and boyfriends,” I laughed.

“Sorry,” she mumbled before looking at me. “So you wouldn’t blink if I went out with women? Women tend to be a little more complicated, more prone to finding relationships instead of just no-commitment sex.”

I shrugged again. “So forget women and find girls my age, they would be in it just for the orgasm.”

“Here we go with the cougar thing again,” she sighed, shaking her head before looking at me. “Are you bi, Aaron?”

“No,” I said, shaking my head now, almost leaping at the answer in order to defend my masculinity, but refraining. I just answered, sensing she wouldn’t care if I was, just like I didn’t care if she liked women too. “Straight as the day is long, not that it matters. I think a few of my buddies are bi or bi-curious. I told them whatever, I support you, just don’t give me the gory deets.”

Mom giggled now. “Such a man. At least you’re accepting of other people, though. Have you ever had a side girl?”

I paused awkwardly. “Yeah. Well, even when I was with Gina, I might’ve gotten some action from another girl.”

“Oh? Who?” she asked, her mouth forming a cute little ‘o’. Mom had great dick-sucking lips, I realized. And now that I was finding out about her sexual history, maybe I had no business being surprised.

“Annie Clement,” I admitted. “Remember her?”

“But she comes from that really uptight religious family,” mom said, clearly more than a little surprised. “How on earth did you get her to have sex with you?”

“Well, getting her to wasn’t difficult, and mostly wasn’t my idea,” I answered. “Have you heard the rumour that her parents had her clipped when she was becoming a teen?”

Mom nodded. “Heard it, heard worse. Some of the moms kept whispering that they had her sewn shut to keep her chaste.”

“The clipped part is true, she’s had a tubal ligation,” I continued. “The other part defo isn’t true. Privately, she was outraged that they’d done that to her, and one day she saw me getting changed in an unused classroom. She wanted me to take her, just to defy her parents, which I did. Kinda repeatedly after that, until they moved away.”

“Good on her and good on you,” mom mused, nodding. “Horrible thing to do to a girl. They probably screwed her hormones up for life. Did Gina ever find out?”

I shook my head. “Maybe she wouldn’t’ve cared, I dunno. But she never did, and Annie wasn’t in a position to get into a relationship, so keeping everything on the DL was what she wanted in any event.”

“That’s fair,” mom said, smiling. “I guess we’ve both had our secrets, hm?”

I nodded. “As sucky as this night began, I think it turned out pretty good, mom. I know you better now, and I’m kinda happy about it.”

“Me too, baby,” mom sighed, letting out a satisfied sigh-squeak, stretching her arms over her head, which had the effect of thrusting her tits forward inside her silk blouse,. I guess she didn’t remember I was there, and I stopped staring a microsecond before she opened her eyes. “All the wine and food has made me really sleepy, and the conversation kinda randy. I think I’ll go upstairs and take care of something before bed.”

I nodded and came around to pull out her chair for her. She smiled at me warmly and gave me a close hug, her face buried in my shoulder. My hands were on her back, and I hoped she couldn’t feel the swelling beginning in my pants. That’d be bad.

“Thank you, baby,” she whispered. “What are you going to do now?”

“Probably watch TV,” I answered, not sure I was being all that truthful.

She looked up at me now, a bit of a smirk on her face. “What, no urges to see to after a dud date earlier tonight?”

“Oh, that’s just me being a teenage boy, mom,” I chuckled. “My whole left arm could be lopped off, but as long as I have my right hand, nothing’s gonna stop that.”

Mom giggled and patted the flats of her hands against my chest gently, almost as if patting on a drum. “Naughty. I love you, Aaron, I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Love you too, mom,” I said, nodding. “See you in the morning.”

She kissed me on the cheek close to my mouth and then made her way out of the kitchen toward the stairs. She paused in the doorway and turned her head. “It’s Saturday tomorrow, no work for me. Have you got anything planned?”

I shook my head. “Nope. Maybe casual gaming, but nothing solid or exciting.”

She considered. “Then maybe we’ll spend some more time together and I’ll find out more about what kind of a perv my li’l studmuffin boy has been.”

“I’ll bring the beer, you bring the wine,” I said, grinning.

Mom nodded and continued out, a bit of a wiggle in her walk. I leaned back against the coffee table for a moment and sighed heavily. I shook my head to try and clear it of the alcohol haze and reflect back on the past two hours. I sure as Hell hadn’t expected any of that, although I wasn’t displeased, either. I loved my mom, and knowing more about her just made me feel like things were okay.

Mom liking women and having extramarital sex were eye-openers, and I guess I was relieved that she didn’t kill me for admitting I’d fucked my married History teacher. My sex habits seemed to be of no concern to her, as long as I was careful, so there was another plus. I’d never thought my mom was a prude, of course, I’d heard her telling naughty jokes for years. But how sexual she actually was came as a bit of a surprise. Maybe after what dad did, she sort of buried her former life and history away from me.

Did she really want to continue this conversation with me? It seemed weird, at first, since she had female friends she could have gripe-sessions with, probably to better effect. And I sure as Hell never had bitch sessions with my buddies about this sort of thing. No guy did that.

So why was I looking forward to possibly doing this again with my own mother?

I shook my head again and went into the entertainment room, turning on the television. I kept the volume down, since mom was likely to be trying to sleep, after she finished, well… what she needed to take care of. I stretched out on the chesterfield and began watching some mindless Baywatch rerun, when I heard the slight rattle of pipes in the ceiling.

Mom was in her bathroom, taking a shower.

I tried to concentrate on the TV, even searching for a different show that might hold my interest, but I was finding myself increasingly distracted. And admitting why was proving difficult.

No. Don’t do it.

“Dammit…” I muttered quietly as I put down the remote and got up. I took my shoes off and headed upstairs as quietly as possible, hoping I couldn’t be heard.

Mom’s bedroom had its own en suite bathroom. I approached her room and took a quick peek around the corner, hoping I was being sneaky. The room was dark, except for two small lamps providing a warm glow, and she had two scented candles burning, smelling like… I dunno, roses or patchouli or some shit.

The important thing was, the room was empty, and she’d left the door to her bathroom mostly open. I could hear the shower now, the water beating down. I heard her sigh, meaning she was in the shower, and it was safe for me to get closer. I slipped into the bedroom and got close to the bathroom door, listening as I hid around the corner.

Mom’s sighs of contentment from being under the water soon changed to other sounds, such as prolonged moans.

Holy shit, mom was masturbating in there? I know she’d said she might take care of things, but for her to actually do it after telling me…

I guess I didn’t blame her, after her date failed so hard, and I remember she’d been complaining when she got home about shaving her pussy and not wearing panties for the event. The thought of my mom’s pussy being shaved gave me a stir I wasn’t expecting. I listened quietly as she began working herself, her breathing getting louder, punctuated by the occasional gasp.

I was flattened against the wall beside her door, looking out at her bedroom, but I was wanting to see more. Could I possibly get a look in without her noticing?

Mom’s shower doors were lightly frosted glass, so nothing was clearly visible except silhouettes, I knew this already. Across from the shower stall was her big sink and the long vanity mirror. I might be able to see in that reflection. The frosting would keep her from seeing me in the mirror (I hoped).

I turned my head and glanced around the corner, looking at the mirror.

Sure enough, I could see mom’s form behind the glass. It was almost as if were was a mosaic, like one of those censored Japanese porn clips. I could see she was almost writhing now, what I assumed was an arm moving across her chest (and no doubt her breasts), while the other was moving back and forth between her legs. Mom was sighing and moaning quietly.

Wow, lookit her go. Damn, mom.

Then she stopped, and I panicked that maybe she’d seen or sensed me, but I was making no noise, and my logical brain reminded me that there was no way in Hell she could see me in her mirror. I steeled myself and kept watching, perhaps leaning in a little more to get a fuller view.

I saw mom turn around in the space, facing away from the shower jets now, toward the back wall.

“Well, hello, there…” she lilted, followed by a giggle.

I frowned, knowing she had nobody in there with her. Who the Hell was she talking to? I looked harder, trying to see by her. The mirror was not proving much help, and I finally took a chance and darted silently across the door to the other side, which allowed me to look directly at the shower. As long as my face stayed in the dark and wasn’t illuminated by her bathroom lights, I’d be fine.

Mom got down on her knees, and that’s when I noticed something that was rather dark on the back wall. It was hard to discern, seeming little more than a discoloured lump to me, at around her hip level.

Mom leaned in and with some moans began kissing something.

Fuck, mom, is that a suction cup dildo?!

The kissing morphed into something else, and I could just see the shape of her head begin bobbing back and forth, punctuated by her moans as she pleasured her toy. I was spellbound as I watched, mom blissfully unaware of my presence. I could make out the shape of her back and her toned ass somewhat, sitting on her heels while she made oral love to the dildo. I guess mom’s dick-sucking lips were getting plenty of practice.

I darted back a bit as she stood and turned around again, but kept watching her. She then took hold of the chrome support bar she had in the shower and unlatched it, pulling it across the space to latch against the opposite wall. She now leaned forward on it, bracing herself before wiggling backward and groaning, clearly taking the dildo inside herself.

Mom, really?! I thought you had those bars installed for grandma’s safety when she visited! That’s what you always told me!

I guess they were dual-purpose. Gran only visited maybe twice a year, so the bar apparatus was clearly not left to languish the rest of the time.

Mom wasted no time in beginning to pump back and forth, leaning over to an almost ninety-degree angle while she braced herself against the bar. More panting and gasping now, and I could make out the vague shapes of her tits swinging and wobbling below her.

My cock was swelling in my pants, and there was no denying why. I gripped it and gave it a squeeze as I watched, almost hypnotized by what I was seeing. Mom kept pumping against her toy, hissing and whispering to herself, words I could only barely hear.

“Gn! Yes! Ahhhh, right there… fuuuuuck…”

I kept squeezing myself, knowing I didn’t dare whip if it out and stroke, but once I was back in the privacy of my room, I knew I was going to town on the ol’ hog.

I did myself one better and pulled out my phone, carefully angling it to catch everything happening with the camera and hitting ‘Record’. I resolved to feel guilty sometime later.

“Gnnnnnnnnn!” mom strained as I recorded her. “Fuck me! Fuck me! Make me cum!”

While it never occurred to me that mom didn’t swear, hearing her do it in the throes of private passion was new. I watched in a trance as she arched her spine and pushed back as hard as she could, making a keening sound before shuddering and sagging against the sturdy chrome bars that kept her from collapsing to the shower floor. I could hear her panting, her lovely body in profile and on display.

I kept watching and finally she move forward, shivering and gasping as the dildo popped out of her. I could see its vague form wobble as it left her. Mom leaned on her bar, composing herself, her face on her forearms. Finally, though, she reached under herself, and I thought she intended to stroke and massage her pussy to bring herself down.

Wrong…

She reached past herself and took hold of the dildo. Then she wiggled around, moving back, and I noticed a bit of a knee bend on her part. She was still holding the dildo when she began pushing, and a tiny grunt escaped her, followed by a squeak.

No way…

“Ohhhhhhhhh…” she hissed as she pushed back until her ass cheeks were flattened against the back wall. “Yesssssssssss…”

My mom had just taken her dildo into her ass.

I was… stunned.

She began by flexing her knees up and down slightly, still braced on her bar. Then she began a slow squirming and grinding motion, letting out another moan. Finally, she was moving back and forth again, having adjusted to the invader. And now the show began in earnest.

Mom was grunting and panting now, mumbling to herself. Her blurred form was swaying almost rhythmically, her opulent breasts moving with her.

“Fuck… fuck…” she panted, lifting one foot and resting it on the side of the stall. I wished I’d had an uncensored view. “Ohhhhh, fuck that’s good… fuck me hard…”

I don’t know if she was imagining anyone, but I couldn’t help imagining myself behind her, plowing in and out of that toned, tight ass. I squeezed my dick, which was a raging hard-on by now, uncomfortable inside the confines of my jeans. I wanted to set it free, but I was still recording and didn’t dare in any event. I’d simply have to wait until the show was over.

Mom kept pumping and fucking the dildo, getting louder with her pants and moans. Before long, I would’ve been able to hear her in the hallway, since she’d left her door open. She was moving faster, fucking like a champ, better than any slut teen girl I’d ever been with. This was completely unreal, and she was getting more vocal.

Then she seized up again, clapping one of her hands over her mouth tight and shrieking into it as she was rocked by yet another orgasm. The phone was almost shaking in my hands as I tried to compose myself, almost cumming in my pants.

Mom sank to her knees finally, the dildo popping out of her ass loudly enough for me to hear and to make her gasp. She was breathing heavily, like she’d just run a marathon, her face on her forearms again. She was whispering and mumbling to herself, but I wasn’t close enough to hear anything. Whatever it was, I’d never know, I guess.

She finally pushed herself to her feet and with a sigh, turned around and looked down at her toy.

“See what you’re missing out on, Ted, you prick?” she announced in a rather self-satisfied voice before she gave the dildo a punitive swat, making it wobble back and forth. I restrained a chuckle and watched as mom stretched again, letting out a satisfied sigh-squeak, as she apparently was wont to do. Then she moved the bar back to its original position and wiggled up to turn off the shower. That was my cue to leave.

I made it no farther than the hallway, stopping to listen as she got out of her shower. I heard her humming to herself, as she stepped out.

“Oh, fucking Hell,” I heard her say to herself. “I left the damn door open. Poor Aaron, I hope he didn’t hear me…”

I thought about it and then quietly hurried back downstairs to the chesterfield, where I stretched out and began watching TV again. Another mindless show was on, and I zoned out, trying to pacify the steel bar in my jeans. I heard the padding of feet on the stairs and shifted one leg slightly, concealing the predicament in my pants. This proved damned uncomfortable and I was at a loss for what to do.

I just went for broke and turned onto my back and pretended to be asleep, my head turned to the side. Yes, mom’d see my huge boner in my jeans, but with any luck, she’d think I was having a sexy dream. I was committed now, so I’d just have to wait and see what happened.

Mom came quietly into the entertainment room and looked down at me. I couldn’t see her, since my eyes were closed, but I knew she was staring at me.

“Goodness, baby,” she mused in a soft voice, her voice tinged with amusement. “What kind of a dream are you having?”

I heard her kneel and then it was quiet again.

“Lucky girls, whoever they are,” she lilted. Then she took the remote from beside my head and turned off the television. She found a blanket and put it over me before leaning in and kissing my forehead so very gently.

“Goodnight, my li’l prince,” she whispered before standing up and making her way out of the room. I heard her head back upstairs and then all was silent again. I opened my eyes and sighed heavily. Eventually, I’d need to go to my room, because all my jerking off supplies were in there, and I wasn’t about to risk getting spooge on mom’s carpet if I got too eager.

I pulled out my phone and found the video, popping in my earbuds and then hitting ‘Play’.

“Gnnnnnnnnn! Fuck me! Fuck me! Make me cum!”

Daaaaaaaamn…

Yes, the image of my mom was blurry, but I already knew what she looked like, and interposing her over the blur was easy enough in my mind. Mom rocking back and forth, her eyes closed as she fucked herself on that wall-mounted dildo. My hard-on was straining almost painfully. If I went upstairs and jacked off, there was no way in Hell she wouldn’t hear me.

I got up and went down to the basement, where there was plenty of room and the laundry machines. No sooner was I downstairs than I had almost ripped off my jeans and taken down my boxers. I moved over to the sink that was next to the washer and began jacking off almost feverishly, images of my mom getting herself off already in my head before I stared at my phone and hit ‘Play’.

“Fuck… fuck… Ohhhhh, fuck that’s good… fuck me hard…”

I’m not sure I’ve ever cum so fast in my recent adult life, or that hard. I thought I was going to rip my dick off as I jerked, feeling the cum shoot up my shaft and explode into the sink in front of me as I desperately attempted to aim while keeping my eyes glued to my phone screen.

My mom started coming down in the video about the same time as I did, and I almost dropped to my knees the way she had. My hand had finally milked me of cum, and I leaned against the sink, breathing heavily. Holy shit, that was something.

I watched the video until the end and then found the energy to clean myself up. I washed out the sink of all my jizz, hoping I didn’t miss any spots. I felt, tired, spent, and very satisfied. Masturbating while watching blurred video of my mom getting herself off was one of the best orgasms I’d ever experienced.

I wearily went back upstairs and folded the blanket she’d put me under back in its place on the chesterfield. I managed to clean up our debris in the kitchen, not leaving it for the morning (that was inconsiderate to mom), then plodded up to my room, mostly closing the door behind me. I almost collapsed onto my bed, still buck naked and rolled onto my back. I stared at the ceiling of my dark room and felt myself fading from consciousness.

I slept the sleep of the well-sated, if not the damned for what I’d done.

***

Saturday morning…

I woke up to the smell of coffee, eggs, and bacon downstairs, and I smiled. The spring sun was straming through my window, and I stretched my long frame, realizing I was naked on top of my covers.

Oh, right, last night…

I had to make sure I hadn’t dreamed that whole thing, especially the bit with my mom getting her rocks off in her bathroom. I found my phone near my pillow and made sure to turn down the volume before going to my galley, finding the video, and hitting ‘Play’…

Yep, there it was in all its silhouetted glory. And damned if my cock didn’t stir and begin getting stiff immediately.

I was tempted to toss one out, but the coffee and food was smelling so good that I decided to forgo my morning ritual and go downstairs instead. I got up and put on some boxer shorts, followed by a white shirt. Then I went across the hall to splash cold water on my face and then run my hands under it, hoping to get rid of my hard-on. Once it finally disappeared, I drained the lizard and headed downstairs, ready to meet the day.

“Morning, mom,” I said as I headed into the kitchen. She was facing away from me, at the stove, clearly on a roll making breakfast. She was wearing her favourite robe, a silky dark blue thing that cinched at the waist and showed off all her curves. She paused and turned around to face me, and I had to try hard to keep my eyes from bugging out of my head when she smiled at me. The top of her robe was somewhat loose, opened to show the valley between her lovely breasts. One of her long, shapely legs was showing from the opening below the belt.

“Hello, baby,” she sighed, sounding so very happy to see me. She put down her spatula as I approached and pulled me into a warm hug. Body to body like this, separated only by her robe (and anything underneath) and my t-shirt and boxers, I really hoped the beast didn’t stir to life, because there was no way in Hell she wouldn’t feel it. “Mmmmm, you smell like a young man who just woke up, I love it.”

“Glad you like whatever that is,” I said, holding her in the hug. She smelled lovely too, and she was so soft. I ended the hug before I popped a boner on her and smiled down at her. “So what’s with the grand slam breakfast this morning?”

“We just haven’t done it in a while,” she answered, turning back to her bacon and pancakes now. “And I woke up feeling exceptionally refreshed and lively this morning, so after my exercise, I thought I’d put it to good use.”

“Well I ain’t objecting, for sure,” I said, getting the plates and glasses ready while she cooked. “I’m glad you’re in such a good mood. Did you make up for your sucky date?”

“Naughty of you to ask,” she lilted, not denying my assertion. “I’ll be honest, at one point, I was worried you might hear me.”

“Sorry,” I laughed, dodging her inference by not answering directly. “You know, I sleep like the dead.”

“I know, and I came down to check on you in the living room where you fell asleep,” she cooed, smiling at me. “I’m glad you eventually went to bed, though, more comfy for a growing boy.”

“I guess that’s true,” I said, nodding as I set the table for this breakfast feast she had planned. “Sorry if I left my door wide open.”

“Oh, I just ducked my head in to see if you’d made it upstairs, baby,” she said casually, but with a bit of a smirk. “Do you always sleep above your sheets?”

“Oh, uh, no, not always,” I answered, blushing and rubbing the back of my head. “Sorry if you… saw anything.”

“It’s not a problem, honey,” she said in her soothing voice. “I looked in on you, after all, you can be in your own room in any state of undress you like.”

She looked over her shoulder and winked. “For the record, though, Gina is a total idiot.”

“Thanks,” I laughed, relieved by how surprisingly easy this morning was. I came up behind her and hugged her. Mom seemed to sigh and almost snuggled back against me, my hands on the knotted silk belt of her robe. “Thanks for this, mom. And for last night, I feel a lot better this morning because of it.”

“Oh, I understand completely, Aaron,” mom cooed, reaching up one hand to stroke my cheek gently. It almost felt like I was holding a lover, not just my mom. “I probably would’ve been pretty grumpy all weekend too, but you made it better. Thank you, baby.”

I hugged her tight for a moment and then let go to get the juice and pour coffee. The beast was threatening to stir again, so I thought it best to keep moving before she noticed. Once she was done with the food, I pulled her away from the stove and made her sit, pulling her seat out for her.

“Such a gentleman,” she said as she sat down. “I take it you’re serving?”

“You did all the hard work, I’ll do my part,” I pointed out. Once she was seated, I poured coffee and juice for her and then brought over the food, setting it down between us, along with butter, maple syrup, cream, and sugar. “Dig in, mom.”

“Don’t mind if I do,” she said, nodding and helping herself to some pancakes. “To be honest, I’m starving.”

“Real workout last night?” I quipped, grinning at her.

Mom blushed but them smirked back. “Cheeky. But since we were being so honest last night, yes, I guess I did do an excellent job taking care of business, and maybe that helps account for my appetite this morning. What about you? Any extra appetite because of late-night recreational activities, or is this just a ravenous teenage boy who eats everything in sight that I see before me?”

“Y’sound like Gina, mom,” I said, making her jolt slightly and almost do a spit-take with her orange juice before putting it down and giggling.

“Aaron, you are so bad,” she said through her laughter. “Saying things like that to your mother. Like I need to know about my little boy’s culinary habits when he’s dining out on teenage girls.”

“Just bein’ honest,” I said with a shrug. “Kind of a relief, really, because otherwise it’s just locker room talk with my buddies, and that can get pretty stupid and crass.”

She nodded thoughtfully. “It’s not much different with the other ladies in the locker room at the gym, I admit. Maybe it’s just so refreshing to have you to be honest with.”

“You know you don’t have to if it makes you uncomfortable, right, mom?” I offered. I wanted her to stay comfortable, of course, but I wasn’t going to keep pressing and force it on her.

“Oh, I know,” she said, nodding as she put some paprika on her eggs before getting into them. “Trust me, if you said anything I didn’t like, you’d have a warm bottom so quickly, young man. You’ll never be too old that I can’t take you over my knee.”

“Noted,” I laughed, enjoying our banter and hoping it would continue. She looked at her orange juice again thoughtfully. “Baby, thank you for the juice, but I have an idea for something even better. Are you game?”

I shrugged and nodded. Mom got up from the table and wiggled over to her wine rack. She bent over as she seemed to count her way down the bottles, and not staring at her ass under that robe was absolutely impossible. Did she even realize she was showing it to me?

Her butt perked up for a moment as she found whatever she was looking for, and she turned and wiggled back to the table holding a bottle and two glass champagne flutes. “Do you know what a mimosa is, Aaron?”

“Uhhhh, isn’t it champagne and OJ?” I posited.

Mom nodded. “Right, champagne or sparkling wine, at least. But it’s a drink that’s meant to go with a lavish breakfast, it gets served a lot on Mother’s Day.”

I nodded. “I remember them serving it to you complimentary when we went to that nice restaurant for breakfast on Mother’s Day a few years ago. Is it good?”

“It’s delicious, in fact,” she said, opening the bottle and then pouring orange juice into the flutes before topping them with the bubbly. “Let’s celebrate being rid of assholes in our lives with some morning drinking, okay?”

“Well, if you say so,” I said, taking the drink from her as she pushed it to me.

“Hey, it’s champagne, so it’s classy,” she pointed out, now holding out her glass. “To life without douchebags and slags.”

“To my mom, who’s been a real eye-opener for the last twelve hours,” I laughed, clinking my glass gently against hers and then sipping. Mom just knocked hers back like a pro.

“We’ll only get about three glasses each out of this, so no point in holding back,” she said as she refilled her glass.

I chuckled and drained mine, letting her refill it. We then attacked our food, since we were both very hungry. Mom ate about as readily as I did, and I had to admit, I was surprised. Those orgasms must’ve really fired up her metabolism.

“God, I’m gonna have to run a marathon to keep all this food from going to my waist and my bum,” she said, but she kept eating. “Does all the lacrosse, hockey, and pickup basketball really help you burn off all those carbs you take in?”

“Seems to,” I said easily, chewing on some bacon. “It sure ain’t from sitting in my chair playing Call of Duty with the guys.”

“Call it a hunch,” mom agreed. “Speaking of, are you going to be online all day?”

I thought about that. “Mom, only if I’m not spending the day with you, because I’d rather do that.”

Mom’s turn to think about what I’d said. “You would?”

I nodded. “Mom, I enjoyed last night, and before you came home, I was really pissed off and grumpy. We made each other feel better. If I go and play my games, I’m just hiding. Last night, I got to vent and complain and tell off my bitch of an ex, at least to you. And I’m guessing you felt the same.”

I looked at her levelly. “I would much rather continue where we left off last night and get it out of my system than just avoid thinking about it. I don’t care if it takes today and tomorrow. If you’re game for it, I am too.”

“I guess I can’t believe you’d wanna spend time with your tired old mom,” she said.

“Tired old mom?” I almost blurted. “The woman who made this feast this morning? The same woman who I just found out is bisexual and not above extramarital sex and prefers to not use condoms? Who the Hell is this ‘tired old mom’ you’re talking about? Because I don’t see her anywhere.”

Mom blushed. “Thank you, baby,” she said quietly. “That’s very kind of you to say. I guess… I guess last night’s little debacle with Ted rattled my self-confidence, you know?”

“Mom, pardon my French, but Ted’s a fucking moron,” I said firmly. “It’s good that he dumped you, and I’m betting he only suggested that threesome thing as a diversion. He couldn’t keep up with you in bed, could he?”

Mom blushed again. “Well, seemingly not.”

“Then you’re better off without him,” I announced.

“Just like you’re better off without Gina?” she asked, looking for parity.

I nodded. “I’ll find some other girl who doesn’t mind getting naked for me.”

“That should take you all of fifteen minutes,” mom quipped, winking at me. “You’re such a charmer, after all.”

We continued eating, and sure enough, we each got three drinks out of the champagne bottle. Three mimosas is nowhere near enough to get either mom or I drunk, or even buzzed, but the mood was certainly as light as the fizzy drink itself. Once we’d eaten our fill, I cleaned the table quickly and then got ready to do the dishes.

“Let’s do them together,” mom suggested. “Been forever since we’ve done that.”

I nodded and made room for her at the sink, but I insisted on washing while she rinsed and dried. We kept bantering and talking about silly things, and toward the end of the chore, mom reached up a suds-covered hand and wiped it across my lower face, giving me a bubbly goatee. I retaliated by turning the small sink hose on her and gave her a quick blast of warm water. Mom squealed and danced away while I laughed.

She turned and mock-glared at me, her eyes dancing with mirth. The front of her robe was soaked and clung to her curvaceous body enticingly, although I’m not sure she noticed.

“You little brat,” she giggled. “Finish up while I go change into something dry…”

I chuckled to myself as I finished putting everything away and then waited by the sink. I didn’t know if I was supposed to go get changed as well, but since mom hadn’t said anything, I simply waited in my boxers and t-shirt, which was very often my weekend attire, at least in the morning. It never bothered mom that I walked around like a teenage slob boy, as long as I didn’t smell bad.

She was back soon enough, having changed into another robe, this one kind of scarlet, and rather shorter than the first. She seemed to have tied the top a little tighter this time. More of her long legs were on display, not that I had a problem with this. Little Aaron didn’t mind either, once I felt him stir.

“Okay, before I get any closer to you, back away from the sink jet, sir,” mom said in a mock-stern tone, but with a smirk on her pretty face and pointing at me. I chuckled and stepped forward away from the sink, and mom came and wrapped me up in another hug, not noticing (or maybe not caring) that the hug around my shoulders raised the hem of her robe and now her panties were pressing against my boxers.

“I can’t believe you want to spend the day with me,” she murmured, her face next to mine. “All moms want to hear that occasionally from their sons.”

I kept holding her, risking the awakening of the python. “I suppose as long as we don’t spend all our time painting our toenails and eating away our feelings with Ben and Jerry’s.”

Mom giggled before pulling back slightly from the hug to poke me in the nose, another smirk on her pretty face. “After that breakfast, I don’t know when I’ll even want to eat again before Monday. But if we’re not painting our nails and crying over boys, what are we doing? Let me hear your pitch, darling.”

I already had my answer. “I wanna spend the whole day drinking beer or wine or whatever, and talk shit about our exes, and whoever else pisses us off.”

“Baby, you’re only eighteen, how many people can possibly have pissed you off yet?” mom asked.

“Well, okay, narrowing it down to girls who have wronged me, don’t worry about the thirteen-year-old boys who piss me off on CoD,” I qualified.

Mom giggled. “You should teach me to be a good player and then I’ll tell them they all got their asses kicked by a mom. Still, are there that many girls who’ve hurt you?”

I shrugged. “Susie Langston in Grade Three promised to kiss me and then never did, I was mad about that.”

Mom snickered. “That little hussy. But if we use this yardstick, chances are I’m gonna be the one doing most of the venting. I have more exes than you do, by two decades and change.”

“I promise to keep it even,” I assured her. “Now, did you find my suggestion acceptable? Any riders you wanna add?”

Mom did some thinking. “Well, if we’re gonna be at this most of the day, we’ll need to switch up the location to keep it from being boring.”

I tilted my head. “Locations like what?”

Mom shrugged. “We started at the little coffee table last night, so we move on from there, of course. There’s the dining table, the living room, the hot tub…”

“You wanna talk shit about our exes in the hot tub?” I asked in amazement.

“That’s the best place to do it,” mom reasoned. “You’re luxuriating in a hot tub and drinking champagne, and they’re somewhere not with you, which sucks for them.”

“Well, not like I’ve never shared the hot tub with you before,” I concluded with a shrug. “Okay, mom, lead on. You’re the expert at this for the day.”

Mom nodded and took me by the hand, leading me into the entertainment room. She gestured for me to sit on the chesterfield and smiled down at me. “We’ve had champagne, morning calls for beer, right? Is it too early for beer?”

“Mom, I’m an eighteen-year-old boy who’s not quite nineteen yet,” I laughed. “Pretty sure I’m never gonna turn down beer, no matter what time of day it is. Besides, it’s happy hour somewhere, right?”

“Point,” she said, nodding at me. “I’ve done more than my fair share of day drinking since your sucking chest wound of a father left me.”

“Left us,” I corrected. “I resent the Hell out of him too, mom, never doubt that.”

Mom knelt down on the chesterfield and wrapped me up in a hug, trembling. “I know, baby,” she whispered. “I’ll try not to vent too much about him today, okay?”

“It’s okay, mom,” I assured her, hugging her back and trying to ignore the feel of her tits squashed down onto my chest. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Aaron,” she said, kissing me on the cheek and then getting back up, smiling again. “Let me go get some beer, but this time, craft. No domestic crap like Molson or Labatt.”

“Okay, but no IPAs either,” I called after her. “I don’t have a man bun or own a Shih Tzu, after all.”

I could hear mom giggling as she rummaged around in the cold storage, where we actually kept decent brews. I hadn’t made it into that unit last night because I was in a foul enough mood that I just grabbed the closest bottle available, which happened to be Molson. Soon enough, mom returned with an eight-pack of Creemore.

“Lager, nice,” I mused as mom handed me a bottle. Normally you needed a bottle opener, but I simply twisted mine off.

“Ooh, do it again,” mom said, passing me her bottle. Pity you’ve got a shirt on, I could see your pecs flexing under the material as you did that.”

I laughed and pulled off my shirt long enough to make a show of flexing my pecs and my core while twisting the cap off mom’s bottle and then handing it to her.

“When did you get so ripped?” she asked, looking at me curiously. “And how did I not notice?”

I shrugged and put my shirt back on. “Mom glasses, I guess.”

“Apparently,” she sighed. “My little boy’s grown up, that’s for damn sure. And Ted isn’t the only fucking moron around recently, because Gina was a retarded bitch to give that up for Skimbo, the Wonder Twink.”

I burst out laughing while mom smiled and winked at me while taking a big pull from her beer.

Half an hour and three beers each in…

“I’m not kidding!” mom almost hissed while I was roaring with laughter. She was holding up her thumb and index finger, maybe just over four inches apart. “And while I don’t fault him one way or another for having a tiny package, that isn’t his fault, the fact that he’d strut around and look like he’d done me the world’s biggest favour annoyed the shit out of me!”

“Did he ever get you off even once, mom?” I asked between laughs.

“Well, yes, I could get off when I fucked him, but that was mostly my hard work, no thanks to him,” she griped. “He just kept pumping away like he was some kind of oil derrick, and I had to maneuver beneath him to make sure he hit certain spots, you know? The least he could’ve done was actively help.”

“Did changing position help at all?” I queried. Mom didn’t seem to mind answering technical questions like this, and if she asked them, I would honestly. I was enjoying this exchange of information.

She shrugged. “I mean, nothing was a guarantee, but some positions were easier to get myself off with than others. Doggie and reverse cowgirl were good for that. He just apparently didn’t notice or didn’t think he needed to do anything except pump mechanically. Boring.”

“So why were you with him at all?” I queried.

Mom sighed. “He was another teacher working with me on a curriculum project, and fucking him kept him motivated to stick at it. We completed the project with flying colours and then I celebrated like crazy when he got his sideways promotion to another school.”

I was laughing again. “S’okay, mom, I did the exact same thing with a science project and some girl in my group. She agreed to do her share of the work if I kept giving her orgasms.”

“Tough life for you,” mom teased, smirking. “Did she do anything for you, like at least blow you?”

“Nuh-uh,” I said, shaking my head. “Not with those teeth. We called her Donna the Piranha for a reason.”

Mom almost did another spit-take, bunching herself up on the couch and giggling, kicking her heels rapidly against the cushion of the chesterfield. She looked at me in mirth.

“Warn me when you’re gonna do that, you little bugger,” she snickered. “I don’t wanna spew all over the chesterfield or my rug.”

I shrugged. “Since I don’t know what’s gonna set you off, I’ll just try to not talk while you’re taking a drink, I guess. So are there any women on your grudge list, mom?”

“Oh, now my little boy wants to hear about mommy’s lezzie action?” she teased, turning her torso to face me and resting her hand against her temple. She was clearly mellow and even buzzed after the three beers and the three mimosas earlier. She must not have thought about how she was sitting, because she had one knee cocked up and her foot on the cushion while her other leg was curled beneath her. If I dared to look down, I was getting a great view of her spare black panties. But there was no way she wouldn’t notice me looking, so I willed myself to not glance down.

“It sounds funnier when you put it that way, admittedly,” I said. “But I wasn’t asking for details about your scissoring habits.”

“Your loss,” she said airily, taking another swig.

“I was just asking if there were any women out there who did my amazing mom wrong,” I pointed out.

Mom sighed. “A few, maybe. One really pissed me off. We had a good sex thing going and then she went frigid bitch. Never found out why. She was really nasty to me after that.”

“Sorry to hear it,” I said honestly.

“It’s okay, I got my revenge,” mom replied.

“What, did you put itching powder in her tampons?” I asked, smirking.

“Ooh, gotta remember that one, but no,” she said, giving me an evil smile. “I fucked her mom.”

Now it was my turn to almost do a spit-take. I recovered and looked at her in shock. “Her mom? How the Hell old were you two?”

“Never you mind, young man,” she said dismissively. “I’m nowhere near buzzed enough to tell you that. In any event, after she’d broken up with me and turned into a megabitch, she was coming home one day and saw me leaving her house with a very smug look on my face. She dashed in her front door and the whole neighbourhood heard the screaming match they had. I just kept walking.”

“Mom, you are the mistress of cold revenge,” I said, holding up my bottle to salute her. “Remind me to never get on your bad side, since you may steal my girlfriend.”

“Based on what slags and bitches they’re turning out to be, not bloody likely,” she quipped, winking at me as she took another pull. I was laughing while she frowned, turning the bottle upside-down and giving it a bit of a shake. Not a drop came out, she’d drained it dry.

“Poo,” she mumbled, setting the bottle aside. “I’ve got room for one more, so I…”

Mom paused in talking, looking down her body and frowning.

“Aaron,” she said, looking at me again. “How long’ve I been sitting like this?”

I swallowed. “Like what?”

“Like this,” she said, gesturing down at herself, still in her position from earlier. “Sitting here with my crotch on display to my son.”

“I… don’t rightly know,” I said, sounding uncertain.

“Let’s say for a moment that’s true,” she ventured in a quieter voice. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

Now this felt dangerous, and I had to be honest, but also careful. “Truth?”

She nodded levelly, her eyes never leaving mine as she leaned closer.

I took a breath. “I knew you were doin’ it, and I willed myself to not look. But I was afraid that if I told you that you’d get super embarrassed and then we’d stop sitting here talking. I’ve been enjoying myself so much and didn’t wanna ruin it. Looking down wasn’t worth that.”

Mom studied me for a moment and there was a sense of wonder in her eyes. “You’re telling the truth, aren’t you? I never even once saw you glancing down, and I would’ve noticed if you had.”

She sat back and shrugged mildly. “Well, this is very comfy for me, so I have no intention yet of changing position just because my panties are on display. So go ahead and look as you please, just don’t make it creepy by staring dumbly, okay?”

“Thanks, mom,” I sighed, pulling at my shirt to air out my chest, since she’d had me sweating. “Y’had me scared there.”

“I don’t know whether I would’ve been embarrassed or not, but thank you, Aaron, for considering that aspect, it’s strangely polite of you,” she said, handing me a beer she wanted me to open. “And take off your shirt when you open this one.”

I complied and mom giggled as my muscles flexed while I removed the cap from the bottle.

“Leave the shirt off,” she instructed, taking the bottle from me. “After all, you have something to look at, why shouldn’t I?”

“First, I went to the trouble of not looking,” I pointed out. “Second, I’m already sitting here in my underwear, you know.”

“Oh, that doesn’t count,” mom said dismissively, waving my assertion off. “Guys in boxers don’t count. A sculpted chest does.”

“If you say so, mom,” I sighed, opening my own bottle while she continued snickering. Truth be told, I was happy for the shirt coming off, since I was warm, between the drinking and the nervous sweating I’d been doing. I was cooler already.

“And at least you’re polite enough to not insist on something stupid like I should take something off since you already had to,” mom sniffed. “That’s a loser argument, reserved for dumb boys who can’t get a woman out of her clothes otherwise.”

“You’re my mom and I love and respect you too much for that,” I said readily, meaning it.

“Am I to understand you don’t want to see your old mom in her underwear?” she teased, smirking again.

“I’ve seen you in a bikini, mom, which was at least as small as any bras and panties you wear, so what’s the difference?” I reasoned, trying to sound dutiful. This was a very strange situation, mind.

“Fair, but there’s something more intimate about seeing someone in their unmentionables, I figure,” mom mused.

“Except for guys in their boxers,” I reminded her, tilting the lip of my bottle toward her.

“Fiiiiine,” she sighed before looking at me. “Would it make us even if I took my robe off?”

I was given pause by her query. “I… wasn’t aware this needed addressing, mom. We’re here to vent to one another. I don’t need you to undress for me, no matter how gorgeous you a-”

I stopped talking for a moment, realizing what I was saying. I might not have been drunk, but three Creemores and three mimosas seemed to have removed the governor from my tongue, or at least relaxed it.

“Go on…” mom prompted, biting her lip and smirking.

I sighed, hanging my head for a moment. “C’mon, mom. All my friends think you’re a total MILF, and for once, they’re not wrong. Yes, I’d be an idiot to not at least objectively understand how hot you are. I swear I didn’t look at your panties when you were sitting that way, but I was fighting it every damn second. For real.”

Mom looked at me quietly, as if assessing me. It wasn’t an unkind look, and finally she smiled warmly.

“I don’t think I’ve heard a full-grown man give a better or more honest answer,” she breathed, standing up now in front of the chesterfield. “You win, Aaron. Here you go…”

I gaped as mom undid the belt on her little scarlet robe and then shrugged the garment off. She stood in front of me now, clad only in her lacy black bra and the practically thong panties she’d been wearing. She had one knee slightly cocked in front of the other, and her hands on her hips, giving me a sultry look.

“Soooo…” she almost purred, still giving me a smirk. “Not bad for an old lady, hm?”

I was, quite literally, too stunned to get a hard-on. Which I probably should have been thankful for, had I been capable of higher brain functions at that moment.

“I know I said earlier that I didn’t want you staring stupidly, but I guess it’s okay right now,” she lilted, pivoting her torso left and right a little big to give me slightly different views. My eyes somehow widened further as she slowly turned her back to me, showing off her tight ass. The material of her panties disappeared between her cheeks. She looked over her shoulder at me and winked. “Whaddya think, big boy?”

I swallowed loudly. “I hope you understand what I mean when I say this, but… I really wish you weren’t my mother right now, mom.”

Mom giggled and turned around to face me again, pleased with my response. She gave a little dance-jiggle of excitement, making her boobs bounce in the bra that could barely contain them. It seemed almost a size too small, so why had she even put that one on?

She grabbed her phone from the table beside the chesterfield and then almost collapsed down onto the cushion, stretching out and resting back on me. My eyes remained wide as her practically naked back pressed against my torso.

“Smile, baby,” she called, giving the camera one of her dazzling smiles while she took a picture of us from above. She sat up a bit and then checked the picture eagerly. When she saw it, she frowned slightly.

“What’s with that look?” she asked, holding her phone up and showing me the pic she’d taken. She looked great. I, on the other hand, looked shocked and maybe mildly panicked, like someone had just shoved razor weasels down my boxers. This hadn’t been my intent, mind. “Am I that repulsive to be pressed up against?”

“Mom, no!” I protested instantly, shaking my head. “You just caught me off-guard. I was still trying to wrap my poor little brain around you standing there in your lingerie, and then alluva sudden we were taking a mostly nude selfie together. You may’ve been ready, but I wasn’t. I’ll… I’ll do better for the next one.”

“I’m holding you to that,” she assured me, nodding. She picked up here beer and looked around. “Time for a new venue, I think. Let’s move this party to another location.”

“Uh, sure, sounds good,” I agreed, standing up, thankful that I wasn’t sporting a hard-on at the moment. “Lemme just get my shirt and-”

“Uh-uh,” mom said, holding up a finger. “Leave it off. If I’m staying like this, you’re staying as is too, pal.”

“Oh, uh, okay,” I said, shrugging. “I didn’t know you were staying like that, but if you’re comfortable…”

“I am, and I am,” she confirmed with a nod. “Follow me, my son.”

I did as instructed, walking behind her. Mom seemed to be putting extra wiggle in her walk, so I figured I was meant to be checking out her ass.

Which I did. Happily. And with no small amount of awe.

It was one great ass, and I knew girls my age who would be insanely jealous of it. I was pretty sure you could bounce a quarter off it if mom was lying down on her stomach.

“We’re heading to the hot tub, so grab some more bubbly while I turn it on, will you, dear?” she called back to me while she opened the door to our back yard.

“Oh, uh… bubbly?” I asked rather dumbly, still staring at her ass.

“Champagne and hot tubs were made for each other, honey, trust me,” she said, now standing in front of the hot tub that sat on our deck. She made a shooing motion at me with her hand. “One of my friends turned me on to it, and it’s been an indulgence of mine for years. C’mon now. Scoot!”

I shook myself out of my stupor that she’d put me in and went to the chiller. I found another bottle of sparkling wine and grabbed two more champagne flutes. I could hear mom humming pleasantly to herself, followed by the low drone and rumble of the hot tub starting up. We’d had it up and running only recently, and I already wasn’t using it as often as I could have. I know mom sometimes did when she was hosting a guest, so to speak.

“Ah, thank you, baby,” she said to me cheerfully as she clambered into the tub and settled in. I guessed at this point that looking at her body in her underwear was fair game, since she was making no attempt to conceal herself with her posture.

“You’re not getting into a bathing suit or bikini?” I asked, still dumb.

Mom made a face. “Why would I? This may be sexy lingerie, but it’s not expensive. It washes just fine, so why would I get a whole different set of clothing wet? Not to mention having to take the time to change.”

I shrugged. Sound logic to me. “I guess my boxers are good enough, then. Not really different from anything I’d wear getting in.”

“Precisely,” mom agreed. She was sitting so that the top of her breasts were visible, the cups of the shelf bra submerged. The only thing I could really see what the black straps going over her shoulders and the lacy border of the cups. And a lot of cleavage. “Now get in here and hand me some bubbly, please.”

I clambered in and mom watched me intently, smirking. She raised her arms and rested them on the edge of the tub, lifting still more of her expansive cleavage into view. And she knew I could see it all. She didn’t seem to mind if I looked, or even stared. I fumbled out opening the bubbly, pouring each of us a glass.

“Thank you, baby,” she said softly as she hers from me. I sat down across from her, settling in. I had to admit, the churning hot water felt very nice. And if I happened to pop a boner, she wouldn’t know.

I hoped.

“So,” she began, after taking a sip of her fizzy beverage. “Where were we?”

I thought about that. “That’s kinda subjective, mom. Where were we prior to what?”

She pondered that for a moment, her eyes roving and her head bobbling a little. It was amazing how cute she could be if I really paid attention. Finally, she answered. “Where were we before I realized I was showing off my gitch to you?”

I thought back. “I’d asked you how old you were when you got revenge on that girl by sexing up her mom, and you told me none of my business. I think that’s where we left off.”

“Ah, yes,” she said nodding. “We were discussing my lezzie activity, right?”

“Indirectly, maybe,” I allowed. “I’m just having a great time finding out about you.”

“Bet you are,” she said, smirking again. She pointed out me with her champagne flute. “Your turn. ‘fess up to something.”

“Like what?” I queried. “I told you, never done anything with another guy, so I can’t match your lesbian antics.”

Mom made a face. “Never done anything? Never stood in a corner and shown one another your pee-pees?”

I screwed up my face and shook my head. “Not that I remember, mom. For real.”

“Wow, I thought all young guys did that,” she mused. “Sorta like how all young girls compare boobs and practice kissing.”

“Sorry to burst the bubble,” I said simply, shrugging.

“Okay, lemme try again,” she said. “Ummmmm… oh! Have you even been in a threesome or foursome?”

My eyes widened slightly. I can’t believe my mom asked me that. “What is this, truth or dare?”

“If that’s what it takes to get an answer out of you,” she replied. “Either answer truthfully, or I’m gonna give you a dare.”

I swallowed again. Looked like I owed her an answer. After a deep breath, I replied. “Yeah. I’ve done the threesome.”

Mom actually seemed surprised. “Really? My little boy’s been in a threesome?”

“Few of them, actually,” I admitted, trying to not blush. Thankfully the water was hot, so I could hopefully pass it off as my skin reacting to the water. “I think… four of them? Yeah, four.”

“Goodness,” mom said, fanning herself for effect. “Did not expect that. Then again, turns out you’re a hardbody who doesn’t mind fucking his history teacher, so maybe I’ve got no business being surprised. Got any details you might wanna share?”

“Isn’t that a different question and a different truth?” I asked.

Mom sighed. “Yeah, technically, but chances are we might get a bit shitfaced, Aaron, and then we might not even remember to ask the question. So the rule is, if we’re answering a truth, we have to follow up with some sort of satisfactory explanation, okay?”

“Well, okay,” I agreed uncertainly. “I’ll try, but… what do you wanna know?”

“Just the basics,” she said simply. “Where were you, who was involved…”

“Ah, well,” I said, nodding and trying to answer her. “I was at a party for one of them. Me and two girls I met, we found a bathroom nobody seemed to be using and we kinda went at it.”

Mom nodded. “Just the two of them concentrating on you, or were they also lezzing out?”

I chuckled, still unable to believe I was having this conversation with my own mother. “They were goin’ to town on one another too. But we kept it pretty even, I like to think. It was a good time, for my first threesome. So, your turn, mom. Truth or dare?”

“Oh, well,” mom breathed, blushing a little herself now. “I want a few more drinks in me before I accept any dares. So truth.”

I was about to ask my question but she stopped me by pointing with her champagne glass. “And no copycat questions. You can’t just ask me if I’ve ever had a threesome now. That’s cheap. Make sure you try harder.”

“Okay,” I allowed, recalibrating. “Ummmmm… okay, what’s the most number of people you’ve had sex with at once?”

Now mom actually blushed, furiously. “Oh, God,” she mumbled, turning her head and looking down at the water. “Why would you ask me that?”

“I thought that was the game,” I reasoned. “So either answer truthfully, or accept a dare.”

Mom closed her eyes for some time before answering. “I… do you know about that sex club downtown?”

“Shangri-La? Yeah,” I replied. “Never been to it, but I know of it. Always wondered.”

“Well, I’m a member there,” she confessed, a statement that raised my eyebrow. “And I have indeed gone on DTF Fridays. I… I can’t be certain, since sometimes there’s piles of people on those nights, but I think the most I’ve fucked around with at any one moment is… five?”

“Wow, mom, a six-way?” I asked, impressed. “Go you. Was it all men, or were there women in the mix? You said we owed one another satisfactory deets after.”

“I know, don’t remind me,” she grumbled, not looking at me. She sighed, clearly trying to remember the event. “It was three girls, one of which was me, and three guys.”

“That’s awesome,” I said nodding.

She seemed skeptical of my statement. “You’re not disgusted?”

“No, why would I be?”

“What if I told you that I took all three men at once?” she challenged, determined to find the line where I’d break down and judge her. “What if I had one in each hole all at the same time?”

“It means I won’t have to waste a Truth asking whether you like anal,” I laughed. I already knew she liked it in the ass, mind, since I’d seen her little show the night before in the shower.

Mom blushed again. “Aaron,” she muttered, but she also giggled. “That’s no way to speak about your mother.”

I was getting the sense that she didn’t mean the chidings, she was just helping herself through these moments by saying these things. She didn’t seem terribly intent on stopping me from asking them. I knew my mom, if you’d crossed the line, she’d tell you, quite directly.

I smiled at her now. “Mom, let me tell you God’s honest truth… I don’t give a damn if you were spit-roasted by three guys. For real. If you were enjoying it, awesome. I’m not gonna condemn you for it.”

“It’s beginning to sound like you couldn’t condemn me for anything,” she almost grumbled. Whatever was going on, I needed to even her out.

So I played a card that would shake her.

“If you want me to negatively judge you mom, there’s one thing you could do,” I said levelly. “Get back together with dad.”

Mom went completely silent for some time.

“Aaron, I could never…” she whispered.

“I know, mom,” I said in my most reassuring tone. “I absolutely know. So when I tell you that I’m not gonna judge you for things like getting fucked by three guys in a six-way, I really mean it. You just need to accept that about me.”

Mom didn’t say anything yet.

“Every single thing you tell me just makes you more amazing in my eyes,” I continued. “You were already the best mom out there, and now I’m finding out about this libertine side of you. It makes me feel better about myself, really.”

She blinked and looked up at me. “Why, baby?”

I smiled. “Because sometimes I wondered if I got my crazy libido and my… uninhibitedness from my shitball of a dad. Now it turns out my awesome mom is who I get to thank for it. I feel great hearing these things from you.”

Mom bit her lip as she smiled and her eyes seemed to glisten. Finally, she got hold of herself and gave me one of her smirks. “Fine, Mister Smartypants… truth or dare?”

“Truth,” I said readily. I wanted to see where my comfort zone ended, confessing all these perverted things to my mom.

Mom tapped her cheek, her eyes darting back and forth as she made a show of thinking. “Okie-dokes… what’s your biggest or most secret kink or fetish?”

“Oh, jeez, mom,” I said, shaking my head. “I’m just a horny teenager, all my answers are gonna be vanilla.”

“I want to know,” she said, looking at me. “I’m not judging.”

I shrugged somewhat helplessly. “I mean, what guy doesn’t love anal, or multiple girls… I love those things, of course.”

“Okay, try fetish,” she pressed. She was going to get an answer out of me. “What genre or kink of porn takes up the most room on your hard drive?”

I didn’t ever have to think about it. “Honest? Tribadism.”

Mom hadn’t been expecting that. “Scissoring? Why?”

“It fascinates me as a man, because it’s the one sexual thing I cannot do or even adequately simulate,” I explained. “So it’s my fetish. I have tons of trib videos on my desktop. I can’t believe I just told you that.”

Mom snickered. “I’d be worried if you didn’t have terabytes of porn on your computer, baby. And oddly, that answer makes complete sense when you explain it that way. Your turn, I guess.”

“Alrighty,” I said, watching as she sipped her champagne, looking at me over the glass, her head angled away from me slightly. “Truth or dare?”

“Truth,” mom said readily, smirking at me. While some people might think it was the safe thing to do, mom and I were both enjoying the confessional aspect of telling each other these things, spurred on by the rules of the game.

I didn’t wait a heartbeat before asking me question. “Do you enjoy scissoring?”

Mom’s eyes widened for a moment before she began giggling. “Ohhhh,” she sighed, letting her head fall back until she was looking at the canopy above us. “Yes, baby, it is, without question, my favourite thing to do with a woman. I’m sorry, I can’t really tell you more without getting into details you don’t wanna hear.”

“Mom, we’ve been over this, I’m obsessed with tribadism,” I pointed out. “Hearing about my insanely hot mom doing it won’t kill the subject for me, you know. And the rules you laid out specified an ‘adequate explanation’. Saying you love it doesn’t really qualify, you gotta admit.”

Mom’s face was flushed, and once again, I couldn’t tell why. Embarrassment? The hot water? All the morning drinking we were doing? All three?

She relented. “Yes, mommy loves scissoring with girls. I love how my…”

Mom squeezed her eyes shut for a moment as she wrestled with this. “my pussylips feel slithering around with another woman’s, and when our clits are brushing and touching. It makes me cum so hard.”

She almost sagged. “And I can’t believe I just confessed to that. To my son. Last night pissed me off more than I thought.”

“Don’t sweat it, mom,” I said. “I’m glad Ted the Douche is gone for your life. Not just because it led to us doing this and getting closer, but because you deserve more than that. You’re a rockstar in the sex department, clearly. I just didn’t know I had one living under our roof with me.”

Mom blushed and giggled, splashing a little bit of water at me. “Charmer. No wonder the girls skin their panties off so fast for you.”

“And I’m kinda pleased that my mom and I share a scissoring kink,” I added. “I’ve had other girls tell me that it feels so amazing, like nothing else.”

“They’re right, smart little sluts,” mom agreed, nodding. “The only thing that’s better is a variant of it.”

I ticked up an eyebrow. “I know it’s technically not my turn to ask, but you’ve gotta tell me, mom.”

“Uh-uh,” mom said, smiling slyly. “Your turn to confess to something, baby. After that, you can ask me about it.”

“Fine,” I said, nodding. “Dare.”

This caught mom flat. “Not a truth?”

“This isn’t Truth or Truth, it’s Truth or Dare,” I pointed out. “So, let’s have it. What’s my dare?”

Mom lapsed into thought for some time, sipping at her champagne absently. I took another sip of mine and had to admit, this stuff was awesome while sitting in a hot tub. I hoped we did this a lot more often.

“Okay,” she said finally. “Lose your boxers. And they stay off until we get out.”

I hadn’t been expecting that, but I had dug my own grave, hadn’t I? Besides, the water was almost at my chest and was churning around and foaming, so it wasn’t like she could see anything, right? I nodded and pulled the boxers off, holding them up as if to prove I’d done it, and then tossed them aside. Mom giggled and clapped happily when she saw them. They landed on the desk with a loud, wet ‘splat’ that almost made me wince, reminding me I was now completely naked in a hot tub while my mom was with me.

“Happy?” I asked, settling back down on the seat.

“I guess,” she lilted. “Comfy?”

“The bubbles feel kinda weird,” I confessed.

“It’s the best thing on earth if you’re a girl, trust me,” she giggled naughtily. “Well, you completed our first dare. You gonna follow up on your question?”

I nodded. “Tell me what feels better than tribadism for you, mom.”

She smiled wickedly, as if she looked forward to telling me. It made me wonder what kind of conversations she had with other women when they were feeling randy or raunchy. “The only thing that’s better is if we’re also using a short double dildo, baby. Something that gets completely swallowed up by the two of us, and still allows us to push and slide our pussylips and clits together while still being full of cock. Nothing could ever make a girl cum like that does.”

“What if you also had a double dildo in your butts?” I asked.

Mom’s eyes widened to the size of dinner plates before she seemed to squirm under the water as she thought about my suggestion.

“I guess you’ve got something new to try the next time you’re with a girl,” I laughed. “You’re welcome.”

“I had no idea I was raising such a brilliantly perverted little sex fiend,” mom almost giggled. “But you’re right, something new to try. For that, I’ll give you another round. Go ahead, baby. But make it a dare this time.”

What did I want her to do? Stand up and shake her tits? Show me her lovely ass again? Those might seem too gratuitous.

“Okay, lose the bra, mom,” I said finally. “That makes us even and you can still protect your modesty with the water.”

“Predictable male,” she sighed, smirking and shaking her head. “Not that I blame you…”

She was wearing a bra that hooked in the front, so she fiddled with it under the water for a moment before shrugging the straps off. Mirroring my presentation earlier, she dangled the waterlogged garment on the end of her finger for me, still smirking, before casually tossing it aside. The bra landed on top of my boxers.

Good aim, mom.

She then rested back, her arms on the edge of the tub, giving me a sly smile. More of her incredible breasts were exposed, creamy mounds of skin, but her nipples were still below the churning waterline, no doubt calculated by her precisely. “Happy?”

“I’m always happy with you, mom,” I said, giving a universal yet honest answer that she couldn’t gripe about. “I told you, today is awesome.”

Mom sighed and muttered something under her breath. She smiled at me. “Okay, then. My turn?”

I nodded, somewhat wary of the glint in her eyes. Mom drained her glass and then filled it back up. She looked at me over the rim of her glass, as if considering me.

“Truth or Dare?”

I’d already done one dare, and mom’s look was almost… predatory. I played it safe. “Truth.”

Maybe that played into her hands, because the smile she gave me was a wicked one. “What, my son, is the naughtiest or kinkiest thing you’ve ever done?”

“Wow,” I breathed, having to sit back and think. “I… gimme a sec.”

Mom laughed. “My eighteen-year-old son has done so many depraved things that he has to think about it?”

“Well, no,” I admitted. “I just have to think about it because I’m not sure anything I’ve done is gonna hold up in the kinky department, not by your standards, mom.”

“Oh, baby,” she cooed, smiling warmly now. “I’m not putting you on the spot or grading you…”

Her smile became a smirk again. “Because you told me what you’ve done to get good grades…”

She burst out snickering and laughing at her own joke. I blushed but waited patiently while she slowly calmed herself. Mom finally settled back into her seat and cleared her throat. “Sorry. As I was saying, this is about getting to know one another, right? I’m not judging. You haven’t judged me.”

“You know I’m gonna ask you the same thing eventually, right?” I pointed out.

“I know, and I’m already thinking on it,” she said simply. “You chose truth, so go ahead and tell me, baby.”

I lapsed back into thought while mom watched me, still sipping her champagne. I concentrated on finding an answer, rather than thinking about how incredibly awkward and downright strange this whole situation was. Think, Aaron, think…

“I’ve played Anal Roulette,” I offered.

Mom blinked. “I don’t know if I know that one. Tell me.”

I took a deep breath. “You line up some girls, or guys, I guess, if that’s your thing. In my case, girls. So you have them line up, and they present their butts to you. You start with one, fucking her ass for a certain time frame, two minutes or something. If she doesn’t make you cum, you shuffle next door and fuck the next girl’s ass for the same time frame. It goes on until one of them makes the guy cum.”

“Oh my gosh,” mom almost whispered, putting her fingers to her lips as she thought about what I was saying. “That’s so perverted and nasty and sexy… you don’t even clean off your dick before you’re inside the next girl?”

I shook my head. “I guess the girls have to trust one another, or at least be pervy enough to not care. I don’t make the rules.”

“God, I really wanna try that some time,” mom breathed, fanning herself. “Maybe down at the club. Well, Aaron, you actually did something kinky before your mom did.”

“Pretty sure I’ve nutted in more girls that you, too,” I added, smiling.

This got a giggle from her. “I’ve always wondered what it felt like to cum inside a girl. Kinda like how you wanna know what scissoring feels like. I’ve wanted to know that my whole sexual life, I thought it must be amazing.”

“I have no complaints about it,” I assured her, finishing my glass of bubbly. Mom held up the bottle and I let her refill me, smirking as my eyes went to her tits when she leaned forward.

“Sorry, junior,” she chided with a wink. “You’ll have to try harder than that to see the girls. Mom’s older, but not stupid.”

“The thought never crossed my mind that you were, mom,” I said, nodding my thanks and taking another sip. Knowing we were gonna be in the hot tub, I brought a bigger bottle of champagne that wouldn’t empty so quickly. “Whose turn is it?”

Mom thought for a moment. “Ummmm… you told me a truth, so I guess it’s my turn. What’s it gonna be? Am I daring to tell you about the kinkiest thing I’ve ever done?”

“That sounds like it’d be entertaining,” I said, settling back and grinning.

“Well the problem is, I’ve done some pretty damn kinky things, Aaron,” mom said hesitantly. “And while I’m holding you to your word that you wouldn’t judge me, the simple fact of the matter is that… well, I don’t know which one takes top spot.”

“Oh,” I said, seeing the predicament. “Ummmm… I hope this isn’t cheating, but… what if you tell me the three things you consider kinkiest, and then I’ll let you know which one I pick?”

Mom smiled in amusement. “Confess my three best depraved moments to my little boy and then let him decide which is perviest? I had no clue my weekend was going to end up this way.”

“We have Ted the Douche and Gina the Slag to thank for that,” I quipped, holding up my glass in a toast. “To douches and slags, may they forever bring us closer together.”

“Douches and slags,” mom agreed, holding up her own glass before draining it. She sighed and then rested her head back, just relaxing and settling lower in the water. “Mmmmm, give mommy a few to think on this conundrum, baby. Not to mention enjoy my little alcohol spinnies.”

“No problem, mom,” I said easily. “Want me to rub your feet while you think?”

Mom giggled and I watched her sink a little lower and wiggle around. Eventually, her feet found my shins. I gently lifted her feet until they were sitting on my knees, which I kept together, not only to use as a perch for them, but also to keep her from discovering my hardening member.

“Is it okay here, honey?” she asked, relaxing. “This spot is really comfy.”

“Should be okay, just don’t slide forward or you’re gonna jam your heels into my dick,” I told her, holding her feet in my hands beneath the water.

“Wouldn’t be anywhere near the first foot job I’ve given a guy,” she snickered, her eyes still closed. “Go ahead, baby.”

“And no falling asleep,” I instructed in a stern voice. “You owe me answers, after all.”

“Mmm, I promise, I won’t fall asleep,” she purred as I began kneading and massaging her feet. “I’m enjoying this day way too much to waste it sleeping, after all…”

I let mom simply enjoy herself and think while I massaged her feet under the water. I heard her sighing and maybe even moaning a little. I’d rubbed her feet before, but these circumstances were decidedly different. Nude in a hot tub with my half-naked mom, playing Truth or Dare while we got shitfaced?

“Mmmmmm,” mom hummed, wiggling a little as I worked on her toes. “I’d forgotten what a good li’l foot rubber you are, Aaron. How many girls have you gotten out of their panties with one of these?”

“I dunno if it was just a foot rub that got them out of their panties, but it sure helped set the stage,” I replied. “Pretty sure the butt massages got me even closer.”

“Ooh,” mom giggled, smiling. “Been a while since I had one of those…”

I kept gently rubbing and massaging, and mom was clearly enjoying herself. Finally, she sat up, pulling her feet out of my lap.

“Thank you, honey, that was exquisite,” she sighed, and she did indeed look rather refreshed. Maybe that should’ve worried me? “Ready to hear mommy’s three biggest kinks or perviest moments?”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but yeah,” I answered, bracing myself. “If being triple-penetrated didn’t crack the list, I gotta wonder.”

“Hush, child,” she giggled. “Here’s some honourable mentions… I’ve had two cocks in my pussy at once… I’ve had two cocks in my mouth at once…”

I smirked. “Nice. What about your butt?”

“I haven’t tried that kick yet, it kinda frightens me,” she said in a rather husky tone. “Now shush and let me continue before I lose my nerve.”

I nodded and waited for her to spill the beans.

“I’ve indulged in minor watersports,” she continued. “Annnnd I’ve pegged men if they wanted it.”

“Cool,” I said, nodding. “Are those the honourable mentions?”

“Yup,” mom said, seeming to claps her hands in her lap. “Ready for the big three?”

“Lay it on me, mom,” I said, nodding. “I’m listening and evaluating.”

“Oh, goodie,” she sighed. “Ummm… well, I’ve been in an amateur porn movie.”

“Whaaaaaat?” I asked, my eyes widening.

“Don’t worry, we were all wearing little masks that concealed at least our upper faces, and I had a bright pink wig on. Even I can’t tell it’s me.”

“My mom was in a porn movie,” I mumbled, trying to keep the grin off my face.

“Not really a porn movie, it was just a li’l orgy that got filmed and is probably somewhere online across the planet now,” mom said with a shrug. “It was quite a few years ago, and I got fucked a lot that day.”

“Was that six-way you were in part of that?” I asked. “How old were you, anyway?”

Mom blushed. “Still not drunk enough to tell you that, baby.”

“Okay, you made amateur porn and got mega-fucked. Next up?” I offered.

She really blushed now. “Oh, God… I had a pretty long stretch of sex with a brother and sister.”

I blinked and shook my head. “Mom, you were fucking siblings who were doing the incest thing?”

She was almost crimson. “I… yeah. Pretty awful, hm?”

“Mom, c’mon, Game of Thrones made incest sexy. As long as the people involved are hot, it’s practically pop culture. I’ve fucked sisters who were lovers, just didn’t fuck them together. I totally would, though.”

Mom seemed stunned for a moment. “Baby, you’ve been with incest sisters?”

“Twins,” I confirmed, nodding. “Just not together, like I said. One would swap in for the other if we went out and the intended sister couldn’t make it for some reason. Wincest.”

She almost sank back in her seat, still lost in wonder. “Aaron, you’ve got to hit those two at the same time.”

I laughed. Less than twenty-four hours ago, I couldn’t imagine my mother not being shocked and maybe horrified if she found out I was trying to make it with twin sisters. Now, I wasn’t surprised she was pushing me to complete. This was awesome. “Believe me, mom, with Gina out of the picture, I’m going to think on how to make it happen. But tell me more.”

Mom shrugged. “I guess, but clearly me fucking a brother and sister isn’t the shocker I thought it was, so it won’t take top spot. I carried on with them for a few months, and I fucked them as a pair, as well as individually.”

“I still can’t get over my mom being bi,” I said, shaking my head. “That is so cool.”

“And I find it strangely validating that you think so,” mom added. “As long as your dopey, horny friends don’t find out.”

“I already keep them away from you, mom, now I’ll be keeping them away harder than ever,” I chuckled. “Trust me on this. So what happened to end the tryst?”

Mom shrugged. “He got her pregnant. The parents found out and the twins hit the road before it all blew up. Never heard from or saw them again. My involvement remained unnoticed.”

“Close call, but wow,” I said. “That’s way hot, mom, but you’ll need to have something kinkier. Tee it up.”

“Thank you, Mister Nicolaus,” she sighed. “Trying to out-perv my son. What kind of mother am I?”

“The awesomest.” I said simply.

“I know,” she quipped, winking at me. “Next up…

This made mom draw in her breath again. A blush followed, and then she looked at me and crooked her index finger, beckoning me closer. Intrigued, I scooted around the tub and got close enough to her that she could lean in to me.

She whispered something in my ear.

I didn’t move, just listening. Finally, she pulled back and sat still, looking at the water.

My head slowly pivoted toward her, my eyes wide with wonder. “For real?”

She nodded, looking very embarrassed.

I nodded and smiled. “Okay, mom, that one wins.”

She looked up at me. “You sure that’s a win?”

I nodded. “That’s peak kink, mom. And before you begin blubbering, no, I don’t judge you for it one bit.”

“Are you being honest, baby?” she asked, her eyes shining with an earnest need.

I nodded again. “Mom, listen to me. I’m not judging, horrified, disgusted, outraged, or anything else you might be worried about. I kinda wanna laugh and congratulate you.”

Mom exhaled. “Then give me a sec, because I’m gonna purge any negative feelings about it from my system and never look back with regret…”

I moved back to my side of the tub to give her space. Her eyes were closed. I just watched her with a sense of awe and wonder. How many moms get exponentially cooler in their son’s eyes as they get older, after all?

When she opened them, she was smiling. “So? That takes the pervy crown?”

“Yep, you made good on your promise to tell me,” I said with a nod. “And if I’m honest, its probably only scratching the surface of kinky and depraved, mom. You’re hardly Linda Lovelace.”

“I didn’t know you knew any old porn stars,” she mused, giving me a funny look.

“I’ve got a huge crush on Nina Hartley and Traci Lords,” I copped. “And quite a few others. The only thing that I prefer nowadays to back then is the shaved look. I prefer it to natural, I admit.”

“Oh, I know, right?” mom said, making a face. “When her hair gets in your teeth when you’re going down on her? Ugh. Ruins the moment. At the very least, trim if you’re not gonna clear-cut.”

I laughed heartily. What a conversation to be having with your mom on a weekend. I filled our glasses again, and mom sipped hers before giving me a sly smile. “It’s my turn to ask you, baby. Truth or Dare?”

The day was young, and I was still enjoying our mutual honesty. “Truth.”

“Are you hard right now?” she asked, still smirking.

That made me pause, because that was an incredibly direct question. If my face wasn’t crimson instantly, I’d be amazed. How on earth do I answer her without making it sound like my mom is turning me on? I mean, she was, but still…

We were being honest. That was the deal. She’d been unbelievably honest with me about things I never should have known about her. I’d been honest up to this point.

I gave her a small nod. Mom just kept looking at me levelly, perhaps one eyebrow raising slightly.

What? I answered her question, I was honest. I- oh, shit…

I remembered the rider to our game. We had to demonstrate the veracity of our answers when possible. She wasn’t required to take my word for it. I had to show her.

“Aw, c’mon,” I laughed, trying to ease my nerves. “That’s cheating, you get to see my dick without daring me.”

“I don’t make the rules,” she said with a shrug.

“Actually, you did make that rule,” I countered.

“And you agreed to it,” she said, smiling wickedly. “Would it be any different if you’d asked me if my nipples were hard? I’d have to show you my tits to prove my nips were hard, and there’d be no dare about showing you my tits.”

“Are your nipples hard?” I asked.

“I’m not the one who needs to back up their truth, hotshot,” she stated. “If you welch on this, I get to think of a punishment.”

I shivered. Mom was very inventive with punishments if you lost a bet to her. Showing her my hardon was infinitely preferable to whatever she might have in mind. I’d once lost a bet to her and spent the week walking around with little plastic baggies in my pocket, because I’d been required to clean up any random dog poop we came across around the neighbourhood. Never again. Mom was evil.

I slowly stood, water cascading off my body and my heart pounding. It was still early enough that the sun was getting under the canopy, and the water glistened as I exposed myself to my mother.

My erection was pointing directly at her.

“Well, you sure didn’t get that from your dad, wherever the shitball is,” she mused before whistling. “What is it when erect? Six? Seven?”

“Seven and a half,” I mumbled, still blushing furiously. Any uppity confidence I normally had when presenting girls with my cock was certainly out the window as my mom assessed me.

“Nice and thick around too,” she observed. “I’ll bet you love to scare the girls with that.”

I couldn’t even nod. I just stood there.

“Okay, baby, sit down,” she said, smiling warmly.

I tried to control myself and not plunge back down in the water hastily, still beet-red. Mom gave me time to recover, but before long, her smirking gave way to giggling. I must have looked irked, because she finally explained herself.

“I’m just laughing at how insane this all is, honey,” she said easily. “You’ve made me admit to things that I wouldn’t even admit to my closest girlfriends, and now I’ve seen your really nice erection. Do what I did with my kink confession and put it behind you. If you’re embarrassed like this for the rest of the day, we’ll never finish our therapy weekend, will we?”

She had a point, and me being self-conscious was pretty dumb, given what she’d copped to. I nodded. “You’re right, mom. I’m fine.”

“So to speak,” she quipped, winking. “It’s a very, very nice dick, baby. No wonder you get all the girls, even if it scares them at first. It scared me this morning when it was soft.”

“So you did open my door and look in on me,” I laughed, and now mom blushed.

She nodded. “I didn’t expect to see you lying naked on top of your covers like that, so I couldn’t exactly not look. Thank God you’re a shower, because if you were a grower, you’d be up on murder charges.”

We both laughed, the tension broken and my embarrassment bleeding from me. Mom had that effect on me. It probably helped that we were both drinking early in the morning.

“Your turn, slugger,” she said. I couldn’t help notice her turn of phrase.

“Truth or dare?” I asked, taking another drink.

Mom smiled. “Truth.” She knew I wouldn’t try something cheap like ask if her nips were hard so I could see her tits. She was safe from that. I had to escalate, after a fashion.

“D’you keep any porn of yourself?” I asked. “Not just naughty selfies, I mean do you keep videos and stuff you’ve made over the years?”

Mom pursed her lips for a moment, then nodded. “I do. A lot of it, actually.”

“Don’t worry, I’m not asking you to prove it,” I assured her. “I believe you.”

Mom sighed and smiled. “I keep a lot of it. The amateur orgy video? Got it. The video of me getting skewered three ways? Got it. I’ve even got video of the event you gave me my kink crown for.”

“Wow,” I laughed. “That one must be in the encrypted folder from Hell.”

Mom nodded and looked serious for a moment. “I took a course on encryption just to make sure that video and a few others were locked up tighter than Trump’s tax records. I can’t wait for quantum cryptography to become a real thing, so I can make those folders uncrackable. I just couldn’t bring myself to part with them. No matter how kinky and shameless, they’re part of me.”

“Mom, you are who you are because of them in a sense, and you’re the most amazing person I know. Not despite them. You’re you, I can’t imagine not celebrating that.”

“Thank you, baby,” she breathed, relief on her face. “And thank you for not asking for proof.”

“Why, because you’d be super-embarrassed to show me you getting spit-roasted?” I quipped.

“No, because they’re a bitch to reach on my computer, ’cause each of the encrypted passwords is half a mile long,” she explained, shaking her head.

I laughed heartily and filled my mom’s glass again.

Half an hour later…

I turned the champagne bottle over, demonstrating that we’d bled it dry. Mom made a face, indicating her displeasure. We were both buzzed, but still lucid, since we were taking it slow. It was a great feeling, and I was so happy to be doing this with my mom.

“Is it my turn to go?” I asked before she concentrated on the problem.

“Oh, uh, yes,” she said, nodding. “Go ahead. And make it a dare to break the truth things up.”

I don’t know what she was thinking, but I got an evil grin on my face. “As you wish. I dare you to go get more champagne for us. And some beer while you’re at it.”

Mom was stuck on ‘Pause’ for a moment or two, and she knew she was caught.

“You little perv,” she said finally, smiling and then nodding. “Very well, young man. You got me…”

Mom simply stood, the water cascading off her body, and her hand came up and covered the front of her breasts, concealing her nipples with palm and forearm. I could still see her large breasts squashing around her arm, which was great. Her tiny black panties were nearly see-through, and as advertised the night before, mom was denuded of foliage, I could tell. Her pussylips clung wetly to the thong. She saw me looking and smirked.

She gracefully clambered out of the tub using one hand, and I got a great view of her magnificent ass, the string that made up the back of her panties not at all visible except above, and she must have known I was staring, because she gave me plenty of time to look. That was the game and the dare, after all.

“Be right back,” she said, wiggling back toward the house and disappearing inside. I watched her the whole way, as I supposed to.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Thank God I’d thought of that dare before she did, since I was completely naked and still sporting a hardon. Walking back and forth with that thing pointing the way would have possibly killed me.

I heard her humming to herself finally and turned my head to look as she came back out. My eyes probably bugged out of my head as she appeared.

Mom was walking back, carrying a six-pack of beer in one hand, and a bottle of large champagne in the other, meaning no hands were concealing her breasts. Her large breasts jiggled in full view as she came closer, her pink nipples looking right at me. The tiny front of her thong panties still clung to her from being soaked by the tub, concealing little.

I gaped as she wiggled around the hot tub and set the drinks down on the table beside us. She was at an angle to me now as she bent slightly, her incredible tits dangling below, one of her nipples somewhat visible still. Before I was ready, and with the deft grace of an illusionist, her one hand was back over her breasts as she turned and clambered back into the tub. No sooner had her nipples gone below the surface of the churning water than she removed her hand and rested her arms back on the edge of the tub, where they had been originally.

“So,” she said with a smug smile. “How’d I do?”

I was clearly still too stunned to answer and mom giggled. “Wow, honey. You have your way with women no problem, but one glimpse of mommy’s tits and you go mute? That’s a helluva compliment for me, no lie.”

I had tried to troll her, make her blush by being the one to get out of the tub, but she’d totally turned it back on me. She’d teased me with the hand bra, making me expect less, and then she’d shown the goods, blowing me away and leaving me bereft of words like a young man who saw boobies in his first nudie magazine.

“Wow, mom,” was all I managed to say.

“Thank you, baby,” she said airily, still smiling. “My turn?”

“Oh, uh, yeah…” I said somewhat distractedly. “Yeah, go for it.”

“I dare you to get us each a beer,” she said, smirking again.

Another pause for me. I looked over at the table where she’d put down the beverages. The little minx had moved it away slightly! In order to get the drinks for us, I’d need to stand up and reach! I had to laugh at her revenge.

“Touché, mom,” I said, and she nodded her head a little in response. Welp, nothing for it. I simply stood, knowing mom was looking at my hardon as I shuffled forward slightly toward her and off to the side. I bent forward and reached for two bottles of beer, Moosehead this time.

“Nice butt, too,” mom mused, reaching up and cupping one of my butt cheeks for a second before patting it. “You’ve got a total package, baby.”

“Thanks, mom,” I said, simply turning toward her as I twisted off the cap and handed her the beer she’d asked for. My dick was now waving around maybe a foot in front of her lovely face. She tried not to stare, but seemed to lose that battle. “That means something coming from you.”

I went back to my place and sat down again. Mom took a swig of her beer and sighed before looking at me. “You okay, Aaron?”

Naturally, I smiled and nodded. “For real, mom. I am. Even if we keep catching one another off-guard. You don’t need to worry or keep asking.”

“It’s my motherly instinct to, but I’ll try to minimize the number of times I do it,” she said. “I just can’t imagine trying to ever explain this to anyone.”

“I know I’m never gonna,” I chuckled. “None of their business.”

“True enough,” she said. “Your turn.”

“Truth or dare?”

Mom reeled us back in to truth for a bit. Probably a good idea. “Truth.”

“Ever get an STD?” I asked.

Mom pulled the bottle she’d been about to drink from away from her mouth and looked at me, giggling. “You’re supposed to tell me before you do that, Aaron!”

“Sorry, I forgot, somewhere between your tits and my dick in your face. Now answer.”

Mom sat back. “Ohhhhhh… yes, I got the clap back in high school once. That was fun, my mom gave me absolute Hell, because she didn’t know I was sexually active before that. Not only did she take me to get the cure, she took my by the ear and put me on birth control. Not that I objected, since I hated condoms.”

“Fun,” I said, picturing my grandmother dragging my mom around, berating her about her promiscuity.

“I also got crabs from a girl,” she admitted. “Courtesy of your scissoring. I was furious. Got my revenge, shaved my pussy, and kept it that way ever s- feel free to stop laughing whenever is convenient, your lordship.”

It’s true, I was laughing. It didn’t bother me at all that mom got chlamydia or crabs when she was younger. That was just bad luck, it wasn’t like she caught herpes or anything.

“Sorry, sorry,” I said, shaking my head. “I asked, I shouldn’t laugh. I guess just the tribadism thing giving you crabs set me off.”

Mom was snickering too. “I guess it is pretty funny. The kiss only women can share, and I got crabs from it. I hated that girl for what she knowingly did.”

“And what terrifying revenge did you enact on her?” I asked merrily. “Fuck her mom and pass the crabs on?”

“Ooh, no, but I wish I’d thought of that,” mom said, snapping her fingers. “That’s downright evil, Aaron. You really are my son. I didn’t fuck and infect her mom, but I smeared my period blood all over her church clothes when she wasn’t looking. She missed it and actually wore them to a service.”

“Ouch,” I laughed. “Evil.”

“She gave me crabs, she got off lucky,” mom grumbled, remembering something not fondly. Not that I blamed her. “How about you, honey? Any scares? No claims showed up on my insurance for you.”

“Just my friends being jerks,” I sighed. “Told me a girl was HIV-positive, after I’d dicked her. She wasn’t.”

“Boys,” mom snickered, shaking her head. “So immature. My turn. Truth or Dare?”

I’d made her dare me last time, so I switched it up. “Truth.”

“Do you keep any porn movies you’ve made with girls?” she asked, smirking before talking a sip of her beer.

I nodded. “Just stuff on our phones, you know. Quick movies and so on. Gonzo shots and videos. I tend to transfer them to my desktop pretty quickly and not keep them on my phone.”

Which reminded me to get that video of mom doing herself off my phone as soon as possible. If she ever saw that…

“Good policy, baby,” she nodded. “A few? A dozen? A few dozen?”

I laughed. “Maybe a dozen, slightly more, but hardly a library. Most of them are with Gina.”

“Guess you’d better get to work creating some new video memories, stud,” she said, winking. “Your turn.”

“Truth or Dare, mom?”

She made a show of thinking and then another wicked smile. “Dare.”

My turn to smile. “Show me how far down you can go on that bottle.”

Mom’s eyes widened. “You… you mean…”

“Your mouth, mom,” I laughed. “I’m challenging you to deep-throat your beer bottle. Can you, or can’t you?”

Once she visibly relaxed from the shock of what she thought I was asking her, I could see her expression harden and a glint of determination in her brown eyes.

“Okay, buster,” she said, nodding. “You asked for it…”

Mom tilted the bottle back, draining it of beer completely before exhaling and then giving it a look, as if measuring and calculating. She held up the bottle in front of her face, eyeing it, apparently bracing herself.

“Just trying to figure it out,” she said as she continued. “Okay…”

She stood now, water cascading off her lovely bod, and I tried not to gape at the sight of her tits, glistening wetly in the daylight. She was on a mission, and clearly didn’t care about her exposure. Half her ass cheeks were out of the water as well, looking incredibly enticing. She put the bottle on the edge of the tub, holding it in place, still studying.

“Bottles are harder than dicks,” she said, although I’m not sure if she was speaking to me or to the universe at large. “Shaped differently. This may take a sec.”

A few more seconds, and then she bent down, her tits hanging beneath her as she brought her lips to the green bottle. She pushed her mouth down, sliding the opening and then a great deal of the glass neck into her throat easily. My eyes widened as she somehow opened her jaw and reached the fat part of the bottle.

She pulled back, making a small choking sound. “Nope,” she breathed as she came up. “I did that wrong. Hold on…”

Mom settled back into the water and I thought for a moment she’d given up. But then she took the bottle and glared at it for a moment before simply tilting her head up and opening her mouth wide. I watched in utter amazement as mom kept a tight grip on the bottom of the bottle with her fingers and thumb pad. She tilted the bottle upside down and began pushing it into her mouth and down her throat.