We stood waiting under the big, four-faced clock that hangs down in the middle of the station and son heard our names called as Paul appeared. He had made a good effort; smartly dressed, fresh haircut, crevette around his neck hiding the badge of honour supplied to him by Jay and carrying a small bunch of flowers. I was impressed. The old-fashioned gesture of flowers on a first date wasn’t lost on Jay who gave him a big hug after I had shook his hand.
“Is this okay,” he asked, indicating the flowers.
“She’ll love them,” Jay replied looking behind Paul. “and here she is.”
Kylie approached us from a far platform. She looked great. She had a respectable summer dress with matching bag and shoes and wore , what I would describe as a ‘cute,’ summer hat. She looked beautiful.
Jay and I hugged her before introducing her to Paul. “Hi,” they both said, shaking hands before Paul presented her with the flowers saying, “These are for you.”
Kylie took and smelled them before replying with a big smile, “Thank you. They’re lovely.”
We led them to a bar on the upper concourse and found a table by the window. I got a round of drinks in and we all did a ‘cheers,’ before lapsing into an awkward silence. Pauls natural shyness and inexperience with talking to girls was clearly evident and Kylie’s only experience of being with a boy was with one who mistreated her and was probably unsure of how to act or what to say.
I nudged Jay under the table, prompting her to start some form of conversation.
“Paul works in photography,” she told Kylie.
“That’s nice.” She replied saying nothing more. Silence followed so I tried.
“Kylie works in our hotel.” I told Paul.
“Cool.” He replied. He was avoiding looking directly at Kylie.
Silence.
We all looked at each other with polite smiles, the silence slowly killing the atmosphere. Jay started taking regular big sips of her wine and nudged me as if to say, ‘keep trying.’
“Kylie used to live near Dorking.” I told Paul.
Paul looked at Kylie, smiled and nodded then looked away again.
More silence.
“Paul lives in Wimbledon. That’s not far from you, is it?” I asked Kylie.
“No, not far.” She replied smiling at Paul then looking back at her drink.
Jay stood up, an empty glass in her hand.
“Another drink anyone?” she asked looking at our glasses which were still almost full and without waiting for a reply said, “Just me then.” and went to the bar before returning with another large glass of wine.
The silence was killing the atmosphere. Neither Kylie nor Paul were forthcoming in any way. Their only bond at the moment seemed to be their shyness.
Jay wasn’t happy. I could tell by the big sips of her drink that this was not what she had planned. She hoped they would both get on, have some common ground and maybe, just maybe, hook up together.
“How was work today?” I asked Paul.
“We took some pictures of a lady and her dog in the studio and then some of the high street for a local newspaper article.” He replied. Kylie sat listening but no reaction apart from little nods.
“How about you, Kylie?” I asked, hoping she would contribute more and get some sort of conversation going.
“I cleaned rooms then helped on reception,” she answered and the silence returned. I looked over at Jay and her second large glass of wine was disappearing rapidly.
“Back in a min,” Jay said as she got up and made her way to the bar, soon returning with large wine glass number three.
This was dire. Something had to be done. I tried to think of common interests they both might had and the only thing that came to mind was that they had both fucked Jay. I couldn’t use that though.
It was Jay who fixed the situation and completely by accident. Having got her third drink, she started to wipe her shoe on the edge of the table.
“What’s up?” I asked looking down and watching her.
“Some stupid bugger has dropped cheese on the floor and I stepped in it.” She answered, getting agitated as the offending lump was wiped on the table leg.
I jokingly said, “Mmm….cheddar.” as it dropped on the floor.
“I like cheddar,” said Kylie
“So do I,” said Paul. “But I prefer Brie.”
“Oh yes, I love Brie,” said Kylie turning to face Paul. “Do you like camembert? I really love Camembert.”
“I love a baked one so you can dip bread sticks in.”
“Or biscuits.”
“Or crackers. What other cheese do you like?” Paul was now fully facing Kylie and the odd conversation about cheese went on for a while, before moving to Pate’s and the best toppings for toast. Jay and I sat in silence, listening, and watching. They had become so enamoured in the talk of food and savoury treats, that they seemed to have forgotten us.
After a good fifteen minutes, I held my phone out of sight under the table and sent a quick text before placing it on the table next to my now empty pint glass. A minute later it started to vibrate noisily and all eyes fell upon it.
I answered it and made sure that Paul and Kylie could hear my every word.
“Oh dear,” I said to the voice on the other end. “That’s a shame. We would come but we’re out with a couple of friends and we promised we would stay with them.” Jay looked at me with a puzzled look on her face but a quick tap on her foot let her know to play along.
“No, no,” Kylie said, hearing this. “You don’t have to stay on our account. Is it important that you go?”
“It is really,” I said with my hand over the phone. “A couple of friends of us need our help.”
“Then go,” Kylie said smiling. I’ll be okay with Paul.” They both smiled at me and I looked at the two of them. They looked perfect together and I hoped they would get together a made a go of it.
“If you’re sure,” I said and nudged Jay to get up. I asked the voice on the other end of the phone where they were before saying goodbye and hanging up. We both stood and hugged them both. “We’ll see you tomorrow Kylie. Look after her Paul.”
“I will,” he said smiling and shaking my hand. We had only gone a few paces before we looked around and saw they were both back in deep conversation, our presence forgotten.
“That was sneaky,” said Jay as we walked through the station. “Did you text Manus to ring you?”
“Yes, and it worked.” I replied. “We’re going to go and meet them now.”
“Where?” Jay asked as we stood at the taxi rank as a black cab approached
“At a Spa, apparently.” I answered climbing in and giving the driver the address.
“A Spa? In London? Cool. That’s just what I need after the past few days. A bit of relaxation” Jay suddenly grabbed my arm. “Hang on, I haven’t got a bathing costume.”
Fifteen minutes later we were standing on the pavement on a normal looking high street outside a darkened glass fronted building sandwiched between a dry cleaners and a health food shop. The sign above the entrance announced it as the North and South Health Spa. On the glass, written in big bold and colourful letters, was ‘Sauna, Jacuzzi, Steam rooms, Pools, Massage, Sun Garden.’
“Funny place for a Spa,” said Jay leaning up to the glass and covering her face to look through. “I can’t see a thing.” She tried the door and it pushed inwards a few inches before she stopped and looked at me.
“Let’s go.” I said and pushed the door open and we both entered. There was a small reception with tropical scenes painted on the walls. A door was ahead of us next to a closed hatch where a doorbell sat. I pressed the bell and after a moment the hatch slid open to reveal a young attractive woman who seemed to be adjusting the small bikini top she was wearing. Having satisfied it was on properly she looked up at us and said with a big smile,
“Hi. Welcome to the North and South. It’s twenty-five pounds for couples.”
I fished two tenner’s and a fiver out of my wallet and handed it over. The girl pressed an unseen button and with a ‘click,’ the door opened a couple of inches. We walked into a short corridor at the end of which was a big, bright lounge area with sofas, armchairs, movie posters and a big TV mounted on the wall showing EastEnders. Sat in a couple of the armchairs was a rather large older gentleman and another man a bit younger and slimmer, naked apart towels wrapped around their waists. They were watching Ian Beale getting a tongue lashing from Phil Mitchell and looked away briefly from the TV when we entered to stare for a quick moment before turning back to the screen. A counter was at the end selling snacks, drinks, and cupcakes, under a clear cake cloche. The young girl reappeared and straight away took off her bikini top. She had an impressive pair of tits which drew Jay’s eyes straight to them as they were freed.
“Sorry about the delay in answering the bell,” the girl said passing over a couple of white, fluffy towels and a pair of locker keys on an elasticated wrist band. “I can’t open the hatch topless so it’s on then off then on and off, all night long.”
We took the towels and keys from her as she asked,
“Have you been before?” We both shook our heads and she smiled and continued.
“That’s fine. Lockers, toilets and showers are through there,” she pointed to a wide door to the left of the TV wall. She then pointed to the other end of the room. “Through the glass door and straight ahead are the two pools, heated and cold plunge pool and more showers. To the left are the sauna and steam rooms. Up the stairs is the film lounge and private rooms, should you want a quick nap or something, and access to the sun garden terrace. Do you want a massage? It’s twenty pounds for a single massage or thirty for a couple.”
“No thanks,” I said, noticing Jay was shaking her head.
“Do you sell bathing costumes?” Jay asked. This perplexed the girl who shook her head slowly and replied, “No, sorry we don’t. But people don’t normally need them here.”
The penny dropped for me and I asked, “Is this a nudist Spa?”
The girl gave a big smile and stepping back and throwing her arms open she revealed that she was completely naked saying
“It sure is. Ta-Dah!”
Jay dropped her head and said a little too loudly, “Oh fuck.” The girls face dropped as she heard this, possible taking a bit of an offence at Jay’s comment.
“I’m, I’m sorry,” the girl said, now beginning to look guilty. “I assumed you knew. Everyone knows about the North and South. Would you like to leave? I’ll give you a refund.”
Leave a Reply