I'll Do It

One day my bestie, Caroline, and me were hanging out. We spent all day together. Shopping, walking the beach, laying in the sun, ended up in a bar had a few drinks then in another bar had a few more. She had been talking about her bf all day. How popular he is, how nice he is, how he bought her this and that present. To be honest, I didn’t want to hear any more. I was single for way to long. I was jealous of her having a bf. Then after another drink she mentioned that even though he was perfect, he was actually too kinky for her, she hinted that he was demanding and that she could not bring herself to do all the things he wanted in the bedroom. I was curious, suddenly I was curious about my friends limits, now I wanted to hear about her sex life. After another drink I brought the topic back around and probed a bit more. She said that he wanted to dominate her and that she wasn’t into it, he wanted anal sex and she wasn’t into it. She said that they had discussed hiring a prostitute to help blow off some steam and release the pressure. I immediately wished she hadn’t told me that, I wished I hadn’t heard it, but I couldn’t un-hear it. We had another drink, she started talking about other stuff, I wasn’t really listening. The night went on, a few guys tried to hit on us, we laughed at them. We danced, more guys hit on us, we laughed them away and danced more.

At the end of the night we left the bar and were about to say our goodbyes when I blurted out, “I’ll do it.”

“What are you talking about?” she said.

“All the stuff that you don’t want to do. I’ll do it,” I said quickly, I got the words out before I lost my nerve.

“What?” she said confused, not getting the point yet.

“You don’t need a prostitute, just let him do all that stuff to me,” I clarified.

“Really? No. You don’t want that?” She was surprised and shocked.

“You can watch,” I felt my heart rate shooting up. What the fuck was I saying now?

“Really? no?” she was still struggling to process it.

“You can be mean to me while he does it. Tell me I’m a slut while he does what he wants. Or while he does what you want.”

Where the fuck did that come from I thought to myself. Do I really want that?

“What? Really? You are saying you would be my bitch? I could pass your ass out as I like?” she was kind of blown away.

Holy shit that is really hot, I thought to myself. No wait? What? Do I actually want this? Oh fuck, seems like I do actually want it!

“Holy fuck. That is really hot. Would you really let me dominate you like that?” Caroline asked for confirmation.

“Yes,” I said quietly, suddenly I was using my smallest most submissive voice. “Just for you and your bf, like you said. Not just anyone. Not other people. We could try it, just once.”

She was enthusiastic, “I just realize I really want to. That’s why I didn’t want him to dominate me. I want to be in charge! I’ll be nice to you I promise. Well not exactly nice, fair, no, not fair either, lets say strict.” She paused to think about it and then she said what she really felt, “I’m the fucking boss of you now. You will do what I say and you will like it. He will realize that I’m the boss and he’ll do anything for me. I will reward him by letting him have you.”

We said nothing for a long time. What she wanted was what I wanted. Scary. Waiting for a taxi, thinking about backing out, that would be the sensible thing to do, just unwind this shit and run away, several taxis went passed, we didn’t go together or separately or say anything for a long time.

“Are we being serious?” she asked.

I said nothing.

“He is at home right now,” she put it out there.

“OK,” I said.

“TAXI,” she flagged down a car. “If you get in the taxi you are my bitch. At least for tonight,” she threw down the gauntlet.

“OK,” I said, meekly.

“You don’t look the part.”

“Wha…t?” I said confused. After a pause I realized that she was in charge. “Tell me how you want me,” I said.

“A proper whore would loose the underwear,” she instructed.

I felt her power rising, she is serious I thought, I have to admit I liked the mixture of feelings that flowed through me when she took control and called me a whore. A whole lifetime of trying to avoid being called a slut or a whore and now I liked it, at least from her. Complicated, or was it actually simple, who knows. I reached up my skirt and stepped out of my panties.

“And the bra,” she clarified her rule.

I reached up my t-shirt and unhooked my bra. We got in the taxi and drove away leaving my underwear in the dirt on the sidewalk. I was wet.

The truth is, during sex I often thought about other women watching me, talking to me, commenting on me, commenting on my performance, telling me I’m a slut. I had seen that dynamic in porn movies. The idea had taken root. I was open to it. I wanted it. A guy fucking me and a girl telling me what she thought about it, telling him to fuck me harder, telling me how I was doing, what I slut I was. If things got really hot I sometimes progressed to imagining her telling him to put it in my ass. She gave the order that I knew I could never give myself. I imagined her encouraging him to fuck me harder while telling me I could take it, calling me a ‘bad bitch’, not letting me back out, just about soothing me enough so I could just about continue, (which, I think, is the opposite of soothing). The idea of another woman witnessing my degradation was a turn on, in my imagination having her verbalize that usually tipped me over the edge. Often as I came she would comment on my value. I can’t explain that detail, that is just how it is. Being watched and commented on had been in my fantasies for a few years now, but it was only a fantasy, I had never done anything remotely like it. All of this is imaginary, in my mind, till now. I had never thought about the real world steps that might lead to that fantasy scenario. I had just imagined the heat of the moment many many times. I guess this might actually be the real world steps to that scenario. My friend was not my friend any more she was the boss. It was going to happen for real.

On the back seat of the taxi she squeezed my knee and slid her hand up my thigh. I was surprised, I hadn’t thought about her touching me, only about her guy fucking me and her watching and commenting. “Slut,” she whispered in my ear, quiet enough that the driver just about might not have heard. But he reacted, he heard alright. I found myself sitting with my legs open. Fully open. She turned on the light on the ceiling of the taxi. The driver adjusted his rear view mirror. I looked out the window as my friend stroked my thighs, presented my vagina to the gaze of the driver. I couldn’t believe it. She held my chin, kissed me then forced me to make eye contact with the driver in the mirror. He looked through me, consumed the scene as if it was a porn clip, consumed me, I felt it, I was nothing but content to him. I was a whore. in the moment I actually liked it, at least accepted it, let it turn me on. My friend was there. I was doing it for her, no she was making me do it, no, hang on, no one was making me do anything, I want this, I still have free will. “Show him your tits,” she ordered, I lifted my top up above my nipples. Was that actually free will? not exactly. I felt her power. She placed my hands on my knees so I couldn’t cover myself and she adjusted my clothes so my pussy and tits were fully on display. I looked out the window, held the pose that she had arranged me in. She brushed her hands over my legs and tits and pussy. I was submissive and loving it.

“There was no charge,” she said after we got out of the taxi.

I was happy to take in the fresh air.

“He is big,” she said.

“What?” I said.

“My bf. He is big. It isn’t only that I’m too prissy for anal. I also just don’t want to be stretched out that much,” she said.

Oh fuck. I thought. I said nothing. With the taxi peep show and all I had forgotten about her bf for a min.

“Have you had it in the ass before?” it seemed like she went straight for the most invasive question possible.

“Ya. Twice,” and just like that I admitted the most awful secret personal thing ever.

“Two different guys? Or same guy two times?” she pressed for more info.

“My ex once and then a Spanish guy on vacation last year,” I couldn’t believe that I gave up such information so readily. At the time I had reasoned with myself that it was OK to do it as long as no one ever knew about it, but I had betrayed myself and that reasoning now.

“Good little slut,” she said, “Were they big?”

“Just average. I guess.”

“Did it hurt?” she asked.

“Ya. A bit,” I answered her honestly, like no point hiding anything now.

“Did you like it?” she continued her questioning

“Sort of,” I said. “It hurt,” I added.

“Lube only helps with the friction. Getting stretched out is another story, you just got to deal with it,” she said. “It’s a process,” she added, not so helpfully. “Were those guys gentle with you?” she asked.

I didn’t answer her. I was getting slightly overwhelmed. What the fuck am I getting into here.

“Did you cum?” she continued her questioning

I didn’t answer her. That detail was even more secret. I hadn’t cum but on the second time I was soo agonizingly close. I had obsessively thought about it and wished for it since then. I had googled it regularly, I was always clearing my search history. I was secretly just waiting for a chance to try again, but that didn’t change how scary it was.

“Don’t worry. I’ll tell him to be gentle… At first…” she said, “Or more to the point I’ll make sure he is only just about as un-gentle as you can handle.”

Now my friend was describing something very close to my secret fantasy. Part of me was excited part of me was terrified.

She kissed me strongly with open mouth and held it for a long time. The kiss caught me by surprise. She was a good kisser. I felt electricity when our lips were touching. “Bend over,” she ordered. Then she was gone, behind me, touching my ass cheeks. Sliding my skirt up exposing me. I was bent double on her front porch, my hands on my ankles, staring at my toes. She was crouching behind me. I felt her breath on my skin. Yes. Then, I felt her breath on my actual asshole. I had never been rimmed before, those guys had gone straight for the main event. I felt her tongue on my asshole. Oh fuck. Yes. I let her do what she wanted. How does she even know how to do this? I slid my hand up my leg towards my pussy.