I kissed her softly, and slowly. She ran her fingers up into my hair as our tongues moved together, and let out a small moan as I felt a tear roll down her cheek. Oh, now she was crying, I thought to myself.
She broke the kiss and rested her head on my shoulder.
“I think this is my favourite part.” she whispered, “Right after I…after I’ve been punished, or…or fucked. My whole body’s still just buzzing with pain and pleasure, and my mind’s completely clear. We’re both just here, and I’m yours.It’s just so perfect.”
She kissed my cheek again before pulling back and looking me in the eye.
“I mean, that’s not everything I feel for you. I still don’t really understand my feelings for you. But…how could I not love someone who makes me feel like that?” she said softly.
Just at the word love, I felt a familiar twinge of annoyance that I hadn’t even recognised until now. I didn’t like hearing that she loved me. Hearing it had always bothered me. It had been what set me off when I’d snapped at her the day before. I’d been ignoring the discomfort it made me feel, but now it made sense. It bothered me because I didn’t believe it.
Because how could she?
Forget who I was, the parts of me she didn’t know, and the parts of me she used to mock. If you only take into account who I was with her, my newly discovered “Dominant” side; the darkness, the cruelty, the violence…how could she possibly love someone like that? How could she genuinely love someone who treated her like I did?
And the parts of myself that I wasn’t showing her just felt worse. I hurt her so much, and I tried to distance myself from those abusive assholes who beat their wives, by telling myself that she wanted it too…but in the end, I was hurting her because I wanted to. It felt dark, and cruel, and sick, because surely it had to be.
But she loved me. I may not have understood it, but she did. She saw the darkest parts of me, my anger and sadism, and was excited where most people would be disgusted. I almost laughed out loud as a thought struck me; I’d been so worried with hiding my growing affection from her, when it was my violence towards her that I was really ashamed of.
In response, I kissed her again. It started slowly, but got more and more passionate until I grabbed her hips and pulled her body onto mine. She straddled me and wrapped her arms around me, our tongues dancing wildly.
I tried not to shy away from the feelings she gave me. I was finished with that, with ignoring parts of myself because they made me uncomfortable. I still didn’t know exactly what Jessica meant to me, but I knew that it wasn’t all darkness. When this whole thing had started, I’d had no idea how funny she was, how brilliant she was, and how…profoundly alone she was, or how hard she worked. I’d just seen her as this two-dimensional bitch because that was all she’d shown me.
But unfortunately, just because I had a better understanding of why she’d always behaved the way she did, it still didn’t excuse it. That deep seated bitterness, the contempt and hatred of her, was still there somewhere, mixing in with everything else I was feeling.
But I chose to embrace the lighter side this time, rather than the darker.
I rolled her over and kissed her deeply, and smiled as she whimpered softly into me. I ran my fingers into her hair and moved my tongue more forcefully in her mouth, causing it to roll sensually against hers. She whimpered again as her body shivered with pleasure, and I couldn’t help but moan in response.
My cock was already hard, and I quickly lined it up with her pussy. I pushed the tip against her slick pussy lips, but stopped before going any further.
“Please fuck me, Sir.” she begged, smiling, “Please fuck your little…whore.”
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