For a second, Shabby actually appeared self-conscious. The megaphone swung down at her side, and she caressed her nose, poking at the ring dangling from her septum. Her eyes danced around the crowd, before she hocked up a mouthful of saliva and spat it in Hank’s direction, it landing on the floor near his boot. “Fuck you,” she said petulantly. “Don’t ever speak to me like that.”
“That’s attempted assault,” Hank said, and he was already pulling out his phone as he walked back towards the entrance of the zoo.
Shabby looked around with concern, and then she huddled together with her two associates. I approached as the three of them were discussing something, but as soon as they noticed me, they split and bolted. “What are you doing?” I called out as they ran off in different directions, each heading down a separate pathway into the further expanse of the zoo’s grounds. “Oh for God’s sake,” I pleaded while looking up at the bluey sky. “I literally don’t have time for this.”
The next half hour or spent walking around the zoo while trying to find the idiots. Each time I came across one of them, they’d bolt once more, and I found myself playing some stupid game of cat and mouse. It was only when I eventually cornered Shabby, and chased her back into the square area near the lions’ den that her childish antics came to an end.
Thankfully, Hank had called the police, and Shabby halted her shenanigans as she galloped right up to them. Realising her error, she tried to change direction, only succeeding in knocking over one of our workers that was manning a popcorn cart.
The two police officers looked completely fed up as they strolled up towards the ruckus. “Again?” the one said while shaking his head, and then he looked towards the green-haired girl as she was sat amongst a load of spilled popcorn. “How much more of your time are you going to waste with this nonsense, Shabby?”
“Is this the issue of the week?” the other officer said with a sigh. “Last week it was tying yourself to the front of the incinerator gates, week before it was that burger place, and now you’re back at the zoo.”
“You’re an intelligent girl,” the first officer said while Shabby was looking all sheepish. “I know your father isn’t proud of any of this. Do you realise how much of an embarrassment you’re becoming for him?”
“Don’t bring my father into this,” Shabby said with a grunt while struggling to her feet. “He sold himself out to the man years ago.”
“The man,” the first officer said with a snort while rolling his eyes. “It’s always sticking it to the man with this lot, isn’t it?” He then placed a firm hand on Shabby’s shoulder, miraculously not causing her to flail around the floor for once. “Let’s get you out of here.”
“I haven’t done anything wrong,” Shabby said. “I have a right to protest.”
“You do,” the second officer said. “But not in here, and not while doing that.” He moved his boot and pointed the toe at Shabby’s drying spit. “If I check the DNA of that I’m going to assume it’s yours?”
Shabby didn’t say anything, and instead, for once, she appeared defeated.
As the first officer led the her through the front gates and towards the patrol car, the other stayed near, collecting up the discarded placards as he spoke into his radio. “Yes, we’ve got one in the car now. We’ll round up the other two when we find them. Are they ever going to get sent down for this stuff?” Her huffed before rolling his eyes, before he cut the call.
I took the opportunity to step up. “Is there anything we can do to stop this?” I asked. “I’ve informed the owners and I’ve told security to keep them out, but they always seem to sneak in.”
“Technically, it’s a civil matter,” the officer said with a shrug. “They have the right to protest. It’s written in the law.”
“Peacefully,” I added with impatience. “They have the right to protest peacefully.”
“Yes,” he said. “But what’s the definition of peacefully? That’s why they’re always getting themselves off on a technicality. The law needs tightening, I’ll agree with you on that. I’m only taking her away because she came in here without a ticket. So, I’ll have her written up on trespassing and causing a public nuisance.” He let out a heavy sigh. “I doubt the latter will stick though.”
“Why not?” I asked in surprise. “We have CCTV everywhere.”
The officer stared at me, then looked around, before he leaned in closer. “Between you and me, that one with snot for hair has friends in high places. She’s not the working class, freedom fighter she likes to paint herself as. She even has some posh name. Shabby is some stupid nickname because she dresses like a bum. Why do you think she has so much free time getting up to stuff like this?”
“So, that makes her above the law?”
“Well, of course not. But this is powder puff stuff. This kind of nonsense is never getting to court, is it? Most of the time it’s a slap on the wrist. The prisons are full and there’s no room for a bunch of posh girls trying to rebel against mummy and daddy.”
“But, what? That makes no sense. I saw they locked up those idiots that glued themselves to the road.”
“Why do you think that is? If they’re annoying the politicians or the guys with cash, then yes, justice is swiftly handed out. For places like this”—he waved his hand around—”none of them care, and we barely have the officers to deal with this kind of thing. They only had us out here today because a load of your customers phoned it in too. Thank God they made fools of themselves with so many people watching.”
“But…this isn’t right,” I said while becoming frustrated by the whole thing. “This is like the tenth time they’ve been here now. They’re always driving customers away and it’s like they’re on some ill-thought vendetta. I mean, why do they have such a grudge against us?”
“You think this is bad?” he said. “Think how the poor guy who owns the Madison Building feels.”
“The what?”
“That big block of apartments on the corner of Hudson Park.” He thumbed over his shoulder towards the zoo entrance. “This one and her ilk have completely taken over the penthouse apartment while he was away over the summer. How they got in there I don’t know, but the guy can’t get them out. They know the law and they’re playing him like a fiddle. They’ve been squatting there for about five months now and he’s still no closer to getting them evicted. It’s going through the courts and everything.” He shrugged. “So, like I say, don’t believe that they’re a bunch of bottom dwellers. She may be shabby by name, and shabby by nature, but these are well-educated irritants that have nothing better to do than cause problems for honest people like yourself. They’ll probably move onto some other issue next week. My recommendation would be to up security on the door. Make sure they can’t enter in the first place.”
“We tried that before,” I said. “They just made a scene outside and drove the customers away before they even paid. We’re struggling as it is and we can’t afford the extra security permanently.”
“Can’t do much about that unfortunately,” he said. “Like I said, if it’s in the public domain, then it’s a civil matter, and as long as they’re not committing a major crime, well, our seniors ain’t gonna send us out. Cuts are rampant throughout the country, and the police force isn’t immune.”
“This country is a joke,” I said while sweeping up some of the mess the girls had made. There was no one else around, with most of my employees concentrating on their designated areas, but I still couldn’t help but vent my frustration. “Why the hell does the law protect people like that? They don’t contribute anything worthwhile to society and all they do is cause problems for others.” I looked over towards the bird house, and smiled while seeing the colourful shades of their feathers. They were incredibly well-cared for, nourished and had been breeding successfully over the past year. Out in the wild, their species was at risk due to deforestation, and it was only within the wall of institutions like ours that their numbers had been on the rise. Conservation efforts were working around the globe, and yet, we were being punished for it by a bunch of uninformed bandwagoners.
“Well, best get off,” the officer said.
“What about the other two?” I asked. “They’re still in here somewhere.”
“They’ll give up,” he said confidently. “We’ve got the ringleader, don’t worry. We know who is the brains behind this idiocy.”
I gripped the brush in frustration as he headed to the exit, before I looked around at all of the enclosures. The animals were completely unaware of the imbeciles that had been screeching on their behalf, and they appeared to care little for the apparent jailbreak that Shabby and her moronic buddies had been trying to stir up.
I continued getting the job done for the rest of the day, and I didn’t see the other two girls, assuming they quietly left once Shabby had been taken into custody. Gradually, the atmosphere returned to normal, and everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves without the bothersome interruption of the vegan screamers.
Around closing time, and as the last of the guests were filtering out of the exit, one of the other junior keepers approached me. Colin was a young kid still completing a marine biology degree at the local college. He’d been working with us for the past few months during a year-long placement as a part of his sandwich course, and I’d had him gaining some experience in the aquarium corner of the facility.
“I’ve just spent the last hour cleaning out the turtles,” Colin said as he approached looking rather sweaty. “One of them protestors got in there and poured food colouring in the tank. Turned the whole thing red. We had crying kids thinking we were butchers or something and we’d killed all the terrapins off.”
“Those god-damned hypocrites,” I raged. “They’re constantly yelling about animal rights, and then they come here and contaminate one of the tanks. Are they actually stupid or what?” When he didn’t laugh, I muted my tone. “You should have come to get me, not just cleaned it up yourself. I could have called the police back as that’s an obvious cause of vandalism. Maybe they could actually make something stuck against those muppets for once.”
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