“And I’m glad you did. I truly am.” Tracie was being sincere. She had always stood by Charlie’s side whenever he needed her. Tracie didn’t always agree with his ideas, but still supported him no matter what.
“I love this girl.” Charlie got a squirmy feeling in his gut. “But I know you think I’ve lost it.”
“No, I think you had a wonderful, life-altering experience earlier, and you’re not thinking logically. You’re lonely, Charlie, and I know still being a virgin at your age weighed you down in recent years. I know it did, but now, you can breathe easy. It’s over and you can move on. Why don’t you come home and seek out a good, clean girl?” Tracie drew a sharp breath. “How do you … do you even know if her real name is Pamela?”
“Yes, it is. She told me it is. I believe her.”
“Girls in her line of work don’t use their real names.”
“I believe her. Pamela wouldn’t lie to me. As for being good and clean, Pamela is that, too, and so much more. She’s the sweetest, most downhome girl I’ve ever met.”
“Charlie, she has sex with random strangers in exchange for money. Think about that for a moment, okay? There is nothing sweet or downhome about selling sex.”
Talking to his sister about this and sharing his plans of losing his virginity before leaving for his vacation wasn’t ideal, however Tracie was the only person Charlie was comfortable trusting with such personal information. Unlike his two younger brothers or colleagues at work, Tracie would never betray his trust and blab to others.
Still, having this discussion was difficult. Tracie didn’t want any specific play-by-play details, of course, but Charlie had no shame speaking to her about losing his virginity. It was therapeutic. Instead, the problem was, at least in his mind, she didn’t understand.
How could she? Tracie had recently celebrated her fortieth birthday, had a husband who worshipped the ground she walked on, and three young children. Her life was the definition of happiness. The exact opposite of mine.
I know Tracie tries her best to understand, but she has no idea what it’s like to walk in my shoes. Whereas she was talkative and outgoing, Charlie was a recluse. Tracie had 345 friends on Facebook. Charlie had four, and she was one of them. I bet she is friends with every single one of them in real life too. While she was the life of the party, Charlie had always been on the outside looking in. She doesn’t know what it’s like to be alone and so depressed that oftentimes you think killing yourself is the only option.
“If I’m wrong, I’m wrong, but I think I’d be making the biggest mistake of my life if I don’t go back and spend time with Pamela again. I love her and believe she can grow to love me too.” Charlie glanced out beyond the gas station and to the dusty sign on the side of the highway.
Flagstone: 121 miles
“I’m going to splurge and stay the whole night with her.”
(End of Chapter Five – to be continued)
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