As my breathing became ragged, I closed my eyes and placed a second finger inside my sex to increase the sense of stretch and fullness. With my thumb on my bud and my fingers moving rapidly inside my sex, the orgasm washed over me like a tidal wave. My toes were curled and my body shook as I felt my pussy start to spasm. Like ripples on a pond, the pleasure just ebbed and flowed, rose and fell, and kept repeating this cycle for what seemed like an eternity. I hadn’t masturbated in days and I think all my pent up sexual frustration just came to a head and poured out of me like a dam bursting.
When I’d come down enough to get my senses back, I casually slid my hand back towards my hip and put my other hand back under my head as it was before. I opened my eyes to see Ella looking right at me with a huge grin on her face.
“That looked like a good one,” she said, as if this was a perfectly normal situation.
“Oh my God, I’m sorry!” I said and looked away from her gaze. “I didn’t mean to. I don’t know what I was doing. I’m so sorry,” I repeated, just humiliated by what I had just done.
“Hailey, it’s me. Don’t you ever apologize to me for masturbating. I’m your best friend. We all do it, you know. I’m so happy that you feel comfortable enough to do it when you’re with me. Don’t you be embarrassed! You touch yourself anytime you want to when it’s just the two of us around. No secrets, no lies, and no shame. That’s our pact. I’d do it myself right now, but I did it this morning so I’m not really in the mood at the moment,” she laughed. All of a sudden, I didn’t feel ashamed anymore. I just felt love. Love for this person who God blessed me with.
If God was going to make me like this, if he was going to make me look like a boy, why couldn’t he have given me a dick rather than a pussy so I could ask Ella to marry me and we could be happy till the end of time? Why does God play such cruel tricks on us? Why does he make me feel a love that he condemns? Why does he torture me so?
We didn’t talk about masturbation anymore that day. We just carried on like it didn’t happen. Besides, it was time to head home and help make supper.
After supper was cleared up, the whole family sat outside on the porch, sipped coffee, and enjoyed the coolness of the evening. Momma read her bible while Dad whittled a new handle for some broken tool. Eventually, we all went inside to wash up the last cups and headed to our rooms to get ready for bed.
I lay in our bed wearing just my shorts, reading while Ella went to the bathroom to wash her face, brush her teeth, and pee. She was wearing a bathrobe and when she got back to our room, she said, “It’s still too darn hot in here.” She let the robe slip off of her shoulders and fall to the chair, exposing a pair of thin white panties but no bra. “Would you mind brushing my hair?” she asked as she tossed her brush in my direction.
I often brushed Ella’s hair and I relished the closeness and body contact. I found the act to be incredibly intimate, and we both enjoyed it. It gave me an excuse to touch Ella without raising suspicion of my inner longings. I could hold her hair, touch her face, and place my hand on her bare shoulder. My greatest challenge was to not lean in and kiss her neck, as I was so tempted to do.
Sometimes, when I was done, she would turn to me and give me a big hug as a thank you. She was often topless when I brushed her hair so when she hugged me, her naked breasts would press firmly against my own. It was particularly arousing if I was also topless and I could feel her naked flesh press against mine. Sometimes, her hard nipples would press into my chest, and when this happened, I would hold her longer, not wanting to feel the contact broken.
Today, I got that special hug, and it left me breathless. I sometimes don’t know how she didn’t see the lust and longing I felt for her, but to Ella, we were like sisters.
Finally, both ready for sleep, we lay on the bed we shared, trying to stay apart from each other because it was so warm. After a few minutes, we fell asleep. At least, Ella fell asleep. I lay there for an hour thinking about everything that had happened that day and how it made me feel. In the darkness, I slipped my right hand inside my panties and, while I didn’t masturbate to another orgasm, I did take pleasure in gently caressing myself until I finally fell asleep.
My window was open and by the wee hours of the morning, it had cooled off quite a bit. Now it was a little chilly in my room. I was lying on my left side facing away from the window and Ella was spooned up against me. She must have been cold also because she was pulled tight to my body with her right arm wrapped around me and her right leg draped over mine.
I could feel her warm breath on my neck and hear her gentle breathing. I put my arm over hers and pulled her closer. In the movement, her right hand cupped my left breast and I felt an electrifying charge run from my nipple to my pussy. It didn’t happen, but it was as though she had grabbed me with the same lust I felt for her. My imagination started to build on the situation and I gently pressed her hand more firmly onto my breast, squeezing gently but being careful not to wake her.
I pressed my thighs tightly together and moved them back and forth, trying to stimulate my clitoris without moving my hands. I could feel the soft firm flesh of Ella’s breasts pressed against my back and I rocked back and forth as much as I dared, trying to feel her bosom move against the skin of my back. It must have worked, because I was sure I felt the hardness of her nipples graze along my skin as I shifted up and down, left and right.
I wasn’t able to get the satisfaction I needed by pressing my legs together, so I very slowly moved my left arm out from under me so that I could move my hand down to my panties. My right hand still held Ella’s firmly to my breast. Deftly, I started working my panties down and with some effort, got them below my hips. By lifting my right knee slightly, I now had full access to my sex.
For the second time today, my heart was pounding in my chest, so much so that I was amazed my heart alone didn’t wake my sleeping love. I found my clit and the entrance to my womb and massaged both alternately. My nipples were like small rocks and I used Ella’s hand to stimulate the one it grasped.
Like my orgasm from that afternoon, this wasn’t going to be one of those long, drawn out sessions that slowly builds to a climax. This orgasm was coming on like a freight train. I was in bed with my lover, her hand on my boob and my hand on my clit. For so long, I had waited for something like this to happen. In my mind, Ella was whispering in my ear, “Cum for me baby. I love you. Cum for me! Don’t stop!”
“Hailey? Hailey?” I froze. “Hailey, are you OK?” Ella said, shaking off her sleep.
I pulled my hand out from between my legs. Shit, my panties were halfway to my knees. I figured I had only seconds before Ella became fully alert so I rolled towards her moving her hand from my breast to my stomach. On my back now, I quickly lifted my hips, reached down and found my panties, and as best I could, pulled them up to cover my sex.
“Everything’s fine Ella. I just had a bad dream. Go back to sleep,” I whispered, trying to force the adrenaline down and make my voice sound sleepy.
“You sure hun. Anything you want to talk about?” she asked as she propped her head up on her elbow.
“No, I just want to sleep,” and I rolled back to face away from her.
“You’re shaking! It’s a bit chilly in here. I’m going to close the window.” After closing the window, Ella lay back down, covered us both with the sheet, and spooned me again, pressing her soft naked breasts firmly against my back.
I lay there with my eyes closed, but I hadn’t climaxed and now Ella was pressing herself against me once more. I wasn’t going to try masturbating again with Ella so close, so it took me some time to fall asleep.
The next day, it was as if nothing happened the night before. Ella woke up in her usual good mood, we got dressed, and started another day. The heat had returned and the house started warming up again. We left all the windows open and headed for church with the rest of the family. All through the service, all I could think about was Ella and the events of the previous night. I prayed to God to take away my sinful longings to be with another woman, but he didn’t speak to me or offer any relief. If he was there, he was unmoved by my turmoil.
I also prayed for God to forgive me for the evil things I did the day before. I should have confessed my sins to the priest, but I could never tell that 65 year old man that I lusted for another woman. It would be too humiliating and I feared the penance he would assign me. Even worse, I didn’t trust him not to speak to my parents in order to ‘save my soul’, so I prayed in silence and asked God directly for his mercy.
After church, there was a social and a picnic, then chores and housework, dinner and cleanup. Before long, Ella and I were getting ready for bed again. Ella had drawn a bath and washed up. As I walked by, she called me in and suggested that I bathe as the water was still hot. I was reluctant but she opened the bathroom door wrapped in just a towel and pulled me in.
“If I’m sleeping next to you tonight, no body odor please. You need a bath as much as I did.”
With the door closed, she let the towel drop and started to undress me. In a few moments, I was also naked and she laughed, “Don’t touch me until you wash off today’s grime. I just got clean and want to stay that way.”
In the bath, Ella washed and rinsed my hair. She told me to stand and then took the soapy face cloth to my shoulders, back, bum, and the backs of my legs. I imagined just turning to face her and allowing her to wash my front side. I saw her smiling coyly at me, dropping the cloth into the tub, soaping up her hands, and using them to wash my shoulders, breasts, belly, and my sex. I imagined feeling her firm but gentle fingers touching all my most intimate parts, smiling and looking into my eyes as she teased and stimulated me. In my imagination, all this happened, but in real life, I sat back down in the tub and finished washing myself while she went back to the bedroom.
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